Dragon Ball Z : the Cactus Juice Saga
by M0b1uz
Summary: Alone, wandering through the cosmos, the last of his kind, the warrior who was once a great prince find's himself marooned on a foreign planet rather similar to the one he had abandoned. Unfortunately, his anguish has only begun. Post-Perfect Cell arc. Beginning of Book 2
1. The Landing

**It has come to my attention that my this fanfic is not as nearly as popular as the ones right next it. That being said, I know exactly where I effed up, and have quickly resolved to undo this controversy...**

 **To anyone whom stops reading by the first chapter, I need to refute some first impressions that you readers are clearly having: Vegeta's powers are not gone; this story is not about a powerless Vegeta pasted onto a reenactment of Avatar. I made them appear to be gone in the first two chapters so that Vegeta does not immediately kill everyone. I am perfectly aware that unlike Superman, Saiyans are naturally super strong and durable with or without ki; I've been into DBZ since 2007 for Beerus' sake. Yes, the first two chapters have him without flying or ki, but his Saiyan body is still practically invulnerable; he just feels pain, that's it. And by the beginning of the third chapter, Vegeta steadily regains his ki over time. By the time he meets Toph, he'll be flying and blowing shit up like always. this is not going to be a simple reenactment of Avatar with** **another** **nerfed DBZ character pasted onto it; this story is about Vegeta, the comical hardships he will face, and how his character is influenced by the Avatar world.**

 **That being said, on with the story...**

* * *

The night sky filled the quiet forest with a shade of content-full blue. Aang, Sokka, and Katara found a nice empty spot in the forestry to land Appa in and set up camp, and were now preparing to dowse the fire and receive some sleep for whatever tomorrow had for them.

As Katara unfurled her sleeping bag, she noticed her young airbending friend reclining atop his own bag, staring up into the stars with wondrous eyes. "Is something bothering you, Aang?" Katara asked. Aang's innocent eyes never left the sky."Do you think that we're alone in the universe'?" he inquired.

"'Course not," Sokka replied, quenching the camp fire with a bowl of water,"there're are plenty of other kids fighting the Fire Nation; that's where people get their inspiration from," he explained.

"No, what I mean is: do you think that, somewhere out there, beyond our world, beyond the stars, that there's...something else?" the Avatar asked, turning to the warrior.

"You mean like, another world?" Katara queried,"huh...I guess it could be possible..." the waterbender speculated, huddling in her arms, as winter wasn't quite through yet.

The team skeptic naturally rolled his eyes as he prepared his own sleeping bag."Com'on; everyone knows there's nothing out there except stars and more stars," he declared.

"But how do we know?" the Avatar inquired,"It's not like anyone ever tried to check..."

"That's because it's impossible," Sokka explained, almost surprised by his friend's naivety," ifs been proven there's no air in space; and if we could never survive up there, well, there you go..." the warrior finished, scooting into his bag and expecting to hear nothing more on the subject. But of course, his sister was far to optimistic to let it die.

"...What if there's a world where the Water Tribe is trying to take over..." the waterbender mused, causing one of her brother's eyelids to shoot open in annoyance.

"Or what if there's a world where there's no war or conflict at all?" Aang continued,"I'd love to see a place that..."

"And you will," Sokka began,"as soon as you master all four elements and defeat the Fire Lord; now stop daydreaming and go to sleep!" he nagged.

"Hang on," Katara teased,"how can Aang be daydreaming if it's night time? Wouldn't he just be dreaming regularly?"

"whatever..." the warrior groaned, squirming deeper into the sac.

The satisfied waterbender removed her shoes and descended into her bag."Goodnight, Aang, Sokka, Appa, and Momo."

"Goodnight."

" _goodnight_..."The area rumbled with the bellow of a fully-grown sky bison, waking up the already asleep lemur.

The young nomad allowed his eyes to regress closed... seconds later having to open them again his lids were irritated by a sudden orange glow. The Avatar looked up to see a truly unexpected sight for anyone about to hit the hay."Oh my GOSH!

"What? Is it a spider?" Sokka rose, frantically searching for the dastardly arachnid.

"Bigger," Aang replied, pointing up to the giant fire ball that zoomed overhead, a heart stopping boom resonating seconds later.

"What was that?" Katara wondered.

"Well, obviously, it was a fallen star," Sokka explained.

"I'm gonna go see," Aang announced, hopping out of his pouch and dashing in the direction of the sound. Katara followed.

"And once again, we're running _toward_ the potentially bad thing," Sokka complained, getting up and following as well.

* * *

The kids stopped before a wide lake, with the enormous blazing orb halfway in. "Okay, we saw the meteorite; can we go to bed now?" Sokka hoped. Aang took a good look at the object, noticing a few details that normal boulders didn't have, such as what appeared to be broken windows, and...was that a door? "It's a ship!" he announced.

"A ship?" Sokka inquired,"That fell from the sky?"

"You don't think that..." broached Katara.

"There's only one way to find out," Aang replied, bravely leaping into the sky and zipping down through the entrance, creating an air shield to plow through the flames.

The Avatar looked around within the teetering, burning vessel, occasionally met with a spark or plum that he instantly blew out. "Hello?" he called,"Is anyone here? I'm here to save you!" The Avatar's call was answered: a subtle grunt penetrating the boy's eardrums. The boy snapped to his left to see a gloved hand reaching beyond the smoke, which soon went limp.

"Don't worry! I'm the Avatar, I've got you!" Aang reassured, running to the arm and pulling out of the smoke a grown man covered in burnt marks. He strenuously dragged the unconscious body closer to the exit, eventually able to lean his head outside.

"Katara! He's too heavy! Make an ice bridge!" He commanded.

The girl nodded, assuming a stance, taking a deep breath, and exhaling a cloud of mist over the lake, creating a narrow path between them and the apparent ship.

The orb started to descend quicker than before, causing the airbender to briefly lose balance."Hurry! It's gaining water!"

"Okay, you reinforce the bridge while I help Aang carry the guy out," Sokka dictated. "Alright," his sister replied. The Water Tribe teen preceded to hastily but carefully cross the temporary bridge, while Katara widened it.

The Avatar managed to pull the man off the sinking vessel. Sokka made it to the struggling boy, who went around the body to pick up his legs while Sokka assumed the upper half. The two got out of the hot-zone just in time before the whole thing collapsed beneath the water, chipping off of the bridge. It was when the boys passed over the dirt that an explosion erupted out of the lake.

Sokka sighed with satisfaction."Ahh, I knew this day was missing something..." he remarked.

* * *

The next morning, the trio, lemur, and flying bison were airborne once more, resuming their journey to Omashu, though this time carrying along some...extra cargo...

"So, how is he?" Aang asked

Sokka turned around to check for any signs of consciousness - there was none."Nope, still asleep."

"Oh, I can't wait till he wakes up!" Katara beamed,"Then we can talk about what life is like on another world..."

The optimist's brother rubbed the bridge between his eyes."Not this again. Just because a guy fell from the sky doesn't mean he's from another planet"

"Then how do you explain the big, round thing I found him in?" the Avatar inquired.

"Well, it was probably some kind of flying machine. It's not impossible; Teo's dad invented one," Sokka explained.

"That was a balloon, what we saw last night was a ship," Katara rctorted,"Can you believe it? A ship that travels through space?"

"Or rather, crashes through space..."Sokka corrected.

"Whatever; are you at least keeping an eye on him?" the waterbender inquired.

The warrior crossed his arms, offended."I think my instincts would let me know if a body's about to roll off..." he replied, resting his hand on said body...which he soon found out was no longer there.

"Maybe if you actually had instincts..." Katara muttered.

The sky was alive with the sound of a half-awake, blood-curdling scream; which was eventually cut off by Appa catching the man on his back and soaring back to his previous altitude in dramatic fashion.

"Well, atleast he's awake now..." Sokka reviewed.

"Was the backflip necessary?" Katara inquired after almost falling off the bison herself.

"Just trying to make sure we stay in the right direction," the Air Nomad excused himself, shrugging. Another grumble permeated the children's ears.

The four (including Momo) huddled up curiously mound the mysterious person. It was a grown man who looked somewhere in his mid-thirties, wearing some strange skin-tight blue suit that enveloped his entire body, with the exception of white gloves and boots, as well as his torso, which was covered in an extra layer of white armor with yellow breastplates; the front and back portion seemed to be held together by a pair of golden segmented straps within each shoulder-though he was saved from a fire just last night, the clothing didn't appear to bear any damage save for the burnt marks (Katara could easily wash those out later). His hair was long and clumped into sharp stalks. The man slowly turned over on his back, showing his face to them while grunting all the way. His eyelids cracked open.

"Hello, do you speak the human language?" Katara slowly asked.

The man seemed to ignore her as his attention reverted to the bald individual hanging above him. "N...Nappa?"

"Don't worry, we have one..." Aang replied, moving away for a moment.

The man sluggishly rose to a sitting position."...Wha...What happened? Where am I?" he struggled, still dazed. Although the man was now sitting upright, his hair stayed in the same position as when he lie down, sticking straight up.

"Your spaceship was destroyed in the crash; but we managed to save you," Katara explained, unknowingly earning a face-palm from her brother (that is, he face-palmed himself).

Aang came back, raising a vegetable to the man. He stared at it for a moment."...What's this for?" he inquired, a bit more edge to his tone.

"It's a cabbage," the smiling Avatar replied," you asked for a napa..." The fully conscious man seemed to glare at the boy like he was retarded.

"Not napa-nappa, you idiot, Nappa-nappa!" he exclaimed in anger, his voice deep and raspy.

Silence...

"grr, Nevermind..." he dismissed, getting up to his feet and literally jumping off the saddle.

The trio shared horrified glances before the Avatar dashed back to the reigns and perform the same stunt as before, making the flying bison loopty-loop in the air, divebomb, and stylishly catching the screaming man as the bison sailed back to slandered bison-flying level.

"I guess you just didn't know you were on a flying bison!" Aang cried over the wind as the man struggled to push himself backup; as expected, his face wore a very confused expression.

"What? Why didn't I...wait, flying what?" he strenuously asked, then crawling to edge of the saddle, getting a good view of the creature's legs and matinee-like tail, now fully aware he was currently in the saddle of the huge bison, soaring through the clouds in much the same way that real bison do not.

"Yep, last one in existence," added Sokka.

"well that's a new one..." he mumbled, unimpressed, though he seemed to pause in confusion a moment later."Wait a second..." he vocalized, taking another peak down,"Green flora? Blue sky? I-I can't still be on Earth, can I!?"he cried a bit dramatically.

"'On earth?" the Sokka repeated, unfamiliar with the term.

"That's impossible! I was out of this solar system at least two space-weeks ago!" he continued as if he were talking to the three.

The waterbender gasped with excitement "So you _are_ from another planet! Ooh, this so amazing! We can exchange cultures, history, traditions..."

The young warrior stared at his sister as if she were from another planet. "Katara, can you hear yourself? Just because we find some weird guy with weird clothes and a bad case of bed-head who crashes in a quote-on-quote 'flying ship' doesn't mean he totally just jumped off Appa again, didn't he...?" Sokka trailed off, realizing the man was no longer with them, prompting the Avatar to anxiously repeat the same maneuver a third time to save the once-more screaming man from peril.

Unfortunately, this time Aang could not catch the man in time, his screaming person slamming into the the trees and ground, a shock wave whipping through the forest before Appa could even land.

Katara shrieked in horror."NO! What have you done!?" she yelled in Sokka's face.

"HOW IS THIS _MY_ FAULT!? HE JUMPED!"

"...ooooowwww..."

The three were silenced by the feint moan behind the kicked up dust. They hopped off of Appa, hurried past the brown fog, past the snapped tree trunks, and in the center of the destruction was a small crater, in which lay the still clearly alive - but even more so clearly in pain - alien man.

"Huh..." Sokka blinked,"I guess he's an earthbender..."

"How could he be an earthbender if he's not from the the earth?" questioned Aang.

"He's not not from earth..." deadpanned Sokka.

The groaning man pushed his face out of the dirt."What the...again!? Why did I fall!?" he wondered aloud, clearly frustrated for some reason.

"Um, maybe because you jumped?" Sokka observed.

The disgruntled man then lept off the ground and again fell on his face; then he jumped and fell again, and jumped and fell again, and attempted so on again, until Sokka latched on to his shoulder."Wait! What're you trying to do, get up and fly on your own!?" Sokka demanded.

"YES!" the man roared out of pure anger, smacking Sokka's hand out of his face

More silence...

"...Urm, so are you, like, an airbender...Do you have airbenders on your planet?" Aang wondered.

The man blinked in confusion."er...w-well yes, I suppose that's a word for it...der...Will you brats shut up before I fry you to crisps!?" he snapped back.

"Wouldn't you have to be a firebender to do that? You just said you were an airbender," Sokka reminded.

The man arose. "I'm not any kind of bender, dammit! I'm a Saiyan!"

Even more silence...

"Yeah, that's right! And just as it happens, I'm the PRINCE of Saiyans!" he continued.

Sokka face-palmed again."Oh, of course, how could I have not known that?" he inquired sarcastically,"Oh right! It could be due to the fact that I have no idea what that is!"

"So you _must_ be from another world..." Katara misinterpreted her brother.

"Well, I'm _certainly_ not from this plan-" the Saiyan shook his head."Nevermind! Why the hell can't I fly!?"

"Because you're an earthbender, not an airbender; seriously, man, pick an element..." Sokka snarked.

"That's it, you little bastard!" the fed up man raised his palm in Sokka's direction."BIG BANG ATTACK!"

 _Poof._

A tiny puff of blue luminescent smoke permeated from the palm of the man...

The kids sat silently, waiting for something else to happen... it didn't...

"...are you...trying to attack us?" Aang vocalized.

The man seemed just as perplexed."...what the...C'mon Big-Bang Attack, Big-Bang Attack!" he kept trying, repeatedly shoving his palm towards Sokka a second time, once again producing a blue puff of smoke. He started forcing his hands in several different weird positions, shouting more random, flamboyant phrases that were neither clever nor catchy all resulting in various small smoke puffs of different size and colors. He then looked at his hands for a short while, his face illustrating a great deal of shock and inner horror, the kind of horror one had when they realized they were blind or deaf, making a series of weird exhaling noises.

Katara snapped her fingers."Oh I get it! You're telling Sokka to 'talk to the hand'!"

"YOU!" the man roared, throwing his finger at the kids,"What did you do to me!? What happened to my ki!?"

"Whoa, wait a minute!" Aang responded, his hands raised defensively; he then paused."Wait, your what?" he inquired.

"My ki! What's wrong with it!?" the man replied.

"Well, I'm sorry, we didn't find a key on you when we saved you; maybe it came off when you fell off of Appa..." Katara began.

"Not that kind of key! Ki! My energy! My life-force! It should be screaming out of my body!"

Aang pondered this for a moment, then snapped his fingers."Oh, you mean your chi! Was that how you were trying to destroy Sokka?"

"Well of course! Keh, typical Earthlings..." he mumbled, looking away and crossing his arms.

"But, the monks always taught me that if any human being ever had that much chi inside of them, they'd explode..." Aang explained.

"Oh, but didn't you hear, Aang? He's a _Saaiiyaann_..." Sokka continued to mock, enjoying this far more than he would usually.

"You dare make fun of my race!?" the man lurched forward, about to seize the teen by the throat.

The Avatar stopped in front of the two."Hey, wait, everybody calm down! Look, Sir, maybe you're just really shaken from the crash and you can't bend yet. Trust me, it's hard to airbend when you're tired."

"Aang has a point, you hit your head pretty hard just now," added Katara,"so hard in fact that no _normal human_ could've survived that fall..." she leered into Sokka's face.

"...except of course for an _earthbender..."_ leered Sokka even harder.

"ENOUGH LEERING!" thundered the man."I am a Saiyan! Not a human! So if what the bald child says is true, then I demand you take me to the nearest civilization where I can recuperate..." the man replied smugly, his arms crossed.

"Oh, well what a coincidence!" Katara beamed,"We're on our way to Omashu: one of the biggest and oldest cities in the history of our world," she explained.

"Yeah, we're going so I can learn earthbending from my hundred year old friend; see, I'm the Avat-"

"Whatever! Hurry up and take me there already! I need to recover my power!" the man replied.

"Alright, Space-man, no need to get any asteroids caught in your pants..." Sokka jokingly settled.

"Condescend to me any further and you will pay dearly, boy..." he warned.

* * *

The three, now a group of four, sat in Appa's saddle while Aang hopped onto the bisons head "Okay, it's still a long trip; better get comfortable while you can..." Aang explained, before he snapped the reigns."Yip Yip!"

Appa slammed his wide tail against the ground and took off back into the sky.

"By the way, I'm Aang," the last airbender began."This is Katara, and her brother Sokka."

"Pleased to meet you, " the young waterbender greeted.

Sokka waved indifferently.

"So, we didn't catch your name..." Aang reminded

The man snorted, lying at the back of the saddle, his arms folded and eyes closed."It's Vegeta: don't forget it".

The sky bison flew off into the horizon, carrying its passengers who lives will be changed for ever, especially Vegeta's.


	2. The Cave of Annoying Musical Hippies

The twenty-four hours following the introduction were exceedingly uneventful; they had camped near a river somewhere in the mountainous region, and so far managing to avoid the subject of other-worldly beings or "mountainbending". The morning after proved to be especially disturbing; that is, the only person disturbed was Vegeta.

Even after taking the time to rest and do nothing per the bald child's advice, the Saiyan prince had yet to show any signs of recovery; his body was just fine, just as strong and resilient as always. Of course, perhaps "strong" wasn't the right word: he was currently attempting to lift a huge boulder off the ground, but no matter how much effort he put into it - and we're speaking of planet-destoying degrees of effort - the rock wouldn't budge. There was nothing wrong with his Saiyan muscles, he would have noticed, but he still was unable to utilize or atleast feel the unrivaled power flowing throughout his body (unrivaled on this planet, that is; had the half-breed accompanied him, that would not have been the case...).

Vegeta ran out of breath trying to move the rock; after a few seconds, he tried lifting it again. It was such an alien feeling to him; he couldn't even fly or lift objects more than twice his own size - something he was able to do literally since birth, and he meant literally: as a boy, he would listen to accounts of doctors and nurses of a Saiyian infant firing out of his mother's vagina like a living baby cannonball, at such a velocity that they didn't even have to severe the umbilical cord, smashing the doctor's rib cage inward and rendering him a paraplegic for life. Whenever Vegeta walked, it was only to look imposing in front of others; he never once in his wildest dreams believe it to become...necessary.

He learned quickly not to threaten his new "escorts" - his only guidance to civilization, seeing as he wasn't quite sure how strong he was without his ki; frankly, experience has taught the warrior not to flaunt whatever advantage he had until he knew for sure his opponents weren't holding back a reserved power, and by "experience", he meant "Freiza", or "Cell"...or "Brolly" or...or basically anyone he met succeeding his battle with Kakarot; he didn't care how degrading it was, the Saiyan was not taking any chances with these human children. You can call him paranoid, but only after you get _your_ tail chopped off by an obese samurai...

"So you're not an earthbender after all, huh?" inquired a shrill voice.

Vegeta's concentration broken, he whipped around to see the teenager known as "Sokka", wearing nothing but a white cloth wrapped around his loins to pass off as underwear, his arms crossed.

He sighed, glaring at the boy."Is there something I can help you with?" Vegeta demanded as he layed his bare back against the boulder. The "waterbender" had strenuously persuaded him to remove his suit and armor so that she could attempt to scub off the burn stains; they were currently drying on Appa's horn, so at the moment, he, like Sokka, was stripped down to a pair of flexible black boxer shorts, and he didn't need to reopen his eye to tell that the boy felt emasculated by the Saiyan's physique.

"Actually, yes. I don't know what life is like on 'your planet', but on this world, when people from a group and are on a journey, the work is evenly divided. I don't care how close we are to Omashu, you better start contributing to the group, or you might as well leave now..." Sokka asserted. Vegeta snorted, and the next thing Sokka knew, Vegeta jammed a good-sized rock into his mouth, effectively silencing him save for the muffled grunts and skwaks as he struggled to pull it out.

"There, that contributing enough?" The Saiyan smirked. At the very least, he could still put ninety-pound weaklings in their place...

Despite the violent gesture, the other children giggled at this as they continued their supposed training, which looked more like textbook seduction from where he was reclining."Guess that crosses 'Shut Sokka Up' off the daily to-do list..." the girl joked.

"Or for the morning atleast..." the unknowingly seduced bald child added."By the way, Vegeta, you still haven't told us anything about where you came from. I mean, are there any different kinds of benders?"

Sokka would of course had made a another skeptical comment, but he was to busy with the rock in his mouth.

The Saiyan just crossed his arms and looked away,"I already told you: there's nothing special about the planet I left; that's why I left it," Vegeta dismissed irritably; he had a feeling if told of the fate of his true home world, it would be too much for these naive youths. Besides, that was his business,"Just take me to this 'Omashu', and I'll be out of your hair."

"Out of our hair? Why would ever want that?" the girl interjected, walking onto dry land,"This is easily the most influential event in world history! Two worlds, two races converging for the first time; I know you probably do plenty of space travel yourself, but for us? It's like, a turning point in the development of mankind! It could potentially end the conflict that's engulfed our people!"

Vegata felt the bridge between his eyes: If he had a space-soda for every time he'd heard this speech, he would have some serious gas problems.

"Besides," the boy beamed, walking over to the Saiyan,"I've made it a point to make friends with everyone I meet. And if you really are the prince of another world, that means I can make friends across the universe!" he explained, holding Vegeta's hand.

The space warrior immediately jerked his hand away as if Aang were on fire; _no one_ touches the exposed hand of the Prince,"Grr-Whatever! Just as long as you don't break into song about it..." he grumbled as he spun around, rubbing his violated hand.

Strangely enough, the surrounding area hummed with a faint tune. The Saiyan immediately whipped around and seized Aang up to eye-level."WHAT DID I SAY!?"

"That's not me!" Aang quickly defended himself.

As the tune grew louder, the four unision looked over towards the direction it was coming from. Out of nowhere, a small group of humans with odd sorts of clothing seemed to rise up from the horizon as they played on, slowly entering the campsite without even realizing.

The man in the front, a tall scrawny fellow with a wierd red had and a halfway put on shirt appears to be leading the way, whichever way that was supposed to be, strumming a pinkish-purple pipa. They continued to sing and dance to some annoying love song blissfully before stopping before the camp.

The kids had only silence to offer; even Vegeta's regular scowl briefly vanished.

"Heh-hey, river people!" The skinny musician beamed.

"We're not river people," Katara replied.

"You're not? Then, what kind of people are ya?"

"Just...people..." was all Aang could think to say.

"Aren't we all, brother? Whoo..." the man lamented.

 _"Perfect, just what I was hoping for on this planet: hippies..."_ thought Vegeta, which in his subconscous translated "target practice"...soon as he recovered, that is; he hoped these people had an address until then...

After expelling the rock out of his mouth by slamming his fists painfully into his abdomen, the half-naked teen stomped over to the man, pointing an accusing finger."Who are you?"

"I'm Chong, this is my wife Lily," he gestures to the woman, who curtsies,"We're nomads - happy to go whereever the wind takes us."

"You guys are nomads?" Aang repeated,"That's great! _I'm_ a nomad!"

"Hey, me too!" Chong replied. .

"You already told us that..." Vegeta reminded.

"...oh..." Chong recalled, scanning Vegeta,"...Hey, _nice_ underwear..."

The Saiyans expression couldn't have been more flat."...Is my suit dry yet?" He asked the waterbender rather hastily.

* * *

It took a while, but Vegeta was eventually fully dressed like everyone else, having walked quit a distance to find the ideal place (he wasn't changing anywhere near that pipa playing freak...)."Alright, I'm ready to depart, onward to Omashu," the prince ordered his "subjects", just then pulling on his glove.

The bald clild turned to the Saiyan with a smile."Hey, Vegeta, you should hear some of these stories. These guy've been everywhere!"

The hippy stopped playing his intrument."Well, not everywhere, little arrow-head. But where we havn't been , we've heard through songs and stories..."

"Tch, ' _everywhere'..._ " Vegeta scoffed," I have traveled across the entirety of the universe, I've seen everything that _is_ to be seen. Why, I was even sent to the pit of Hell once, and miraculously resurrected by sheer technicality..." he tightened his fist in rememberance,"I doubt you insipid neanderthauls have even yet to breach your own atmosphere!"

The whole area seemed to stare at him awkwardly...

"...I've seen a waterfall that creates a never-ending rainbow..." the fat one recalled lathargicly.

Vegeta's scowlless expression returned.

Sokka sighed."Look, I hate to be the wet blanket here, but since Katara's busy, I guess it's up to me.." he began, with his sister shooting him a breif glance,"Vegeta's right, need to get to Omashu. _No_ sidetracks, _no_ waterfalls, and _definately_ no Hell." he counted with his fingers.

" _Whoa_ , looks like you guys've got a case of 'destination fever'; heh, you're worried too much about where you're going..." the skinny hippie explained.

"You've got to focus less on the 'where', and more on the _'going'_ ," the hippie wife added.

"O..." Vegeta began.

"Ma..." Sokka continued.

 _"Shu..."_ Vegeta finished.

"You're right, guys," Katara consigned,"We need to get to Omashu so that Aang can learn earthbending somewhere safe. We're also escorting an alien prince to the nearest city so he can recover from his injuries."

Completely unoccupied, the teen took the oportunity to facepalm.

"Well, sounds like like you guys're headed to Omashu," Chong deduced, causing the Saiyan to facepalm as well," There's a story about an old secret pass... _right through the mountains..._ " he explained like an old ghost story.

"Is this real or a legend?" Katara inquire for confirmation.

"Oh, it's a real legend - as old as earthbending itself," Then, to Vegeta's greater anoyance, began playing an even more annoying love song then before...

 _"Two lovers, forrbidden from one another_

 _The waaar diviiides_ _thier peoplllle_

 _And mountain diviiides them apart..._

 _Built a path to be be together_

"Duh, I forgot the next the couple 'o lines, but then it goes..."

 _"SECRET TUNNLE!_

 _SECRET TUNNLE!_

 _Through the mountain,_

 _SECRET, SECRET, SECRET, SECRET-!_ "

That was all the singer could say before the Saiyans snatched the instrument from his hands and savagely broke it in half with his knee."ENOUGH OF YOUR MUSIC!" he roared, throwing the pieces into the river.

The group was momentarily stunned from his outburst...until Chong simply pull an identical pipa out from behind him."When it comes to music, I'm always prepared." he said to no one in particular, and started playing the tune again, just humming this time.

Vegeta was on the verge of a stroke at this point..."... _That's it_ , I'm out of here..." he finalized, turning around and walking out of the camp.

Aang and Katara naturally threw a concerned glance at the alien."Vegeta, are you sure you want to leave now? There might be a bunch of Fire Nation scouts out there, and this cave could be the only safe route to Omashu..."

"Please," the prince blew the comment, not even facing him,"I don't need your sympathy. Ki or no ki, I'm an unequaled fighter; these 'firebenders' you speak of poeses no threat..."

* * *

"LAUNCH" the Fire Nation commander ordered, his subordinates launching multiple flaming sulfur boulders and fireballs, all shelling Vegeta like a carpet bomb, blowing him away Team Rocket-style.

* * *

"On second thought, I could use the company..." the energy-less Vegeta reasoned as he nonchalantly walked pass the group, his suit once again stained with burn marks and his head covered in ashes.

* * *

After another wash, The group were now on they're way to the cave, walking along a road with ruined temples in the background.

"This tunnel'd better be real, hippie..." Vegeta threatened.

"Actually, it's not just one tunnel," Chong explained,"The lovers didn't want anyone to find out their love, so they built a whole _labrynth..._ "

Sokka wheeled around in shock."Labrynth!?"

"I'm sure we'll figure it out..." the musician mused.

"All you need to do, is trust in love," Lily said,"...according to the curse..."

At this, the teen paused long enough for the others to pass him; then when no one was looking, he attempted to release his frustration a quick burst of writhing and convulsions...it didn't work..."Curse!?" he whined.

The Saiyan clenched his fist in annoyance. The almighty Vegeta, force to navigate through a cave like some ant! In any other senario, he'd just fly over to the city on his own, and leave these insects to slowly starve to death underground. But no, the divine entity that oversees creation itself (he couldn't whether it was that King Kai person that taught Kakarot the Kaio-thingy, or the little green Namekian...") has decided to strip the prince of his mobility and drop down amongst the lesser beings. At least _insects_ can fly...

Though the Saiyan was still perplexed as to how that could've happened. Could it be that the gravity of this world is so intense that it takes an exeptional amount of energy just to walk? No, that couldn't be it; if it took that much effort, the prince would obviously be aware of that since he would have to use his ki to stand upright; and, if it were that difficult, a simple transition to Super Saiyan would be enough to resist it completely, which he was also unable to do as if he had never done it before. He shot a distrustfull glance at the children. It could very well be that these inhabitance had downed his spacepod and drugged him with somekind of ki-draining poison, leading him into a trap within this cave. After all, few tounges in the universe had gone without spreading word of the terror that is Vegeta, let alone the Saiyan race, and these supposed "humanoids" could be in fact a band of alien bounty hunters, perhaps each one a member of a species rendered criticly endangered by some of Frieza's global purges, that have gathered to take revenge for their lost kind upon the only being left to be credibly held responsible for the tragedies. After all, there' no way people of _any_ race could be this stupid...although, if the late Kakarot were any indication, he wouldn't put it past them just yet...

Before he knew it, they were standing before an enormous opening in the face of the mountain, more than lage enough to accomodate the bison. There was a small plague in the wall, no doubt the name of the labrynth in some alien writing, which suspicously resembled the Japenese caligrafy of the previous Earth.

"So, about this so-called 'curse'..." Vegeta inquired.

"The curse says that only those who trust in love can make through the caves," Chong continued," Otherwise you'll trapped in them forever..."

"...And die..." Lily added.

"O-Oh yeah, and die..." he paused..."...Hey! I just remembered the rest of the song..." he stroked his pipa dramaticly.

 _"And diiiiiiiie..."_ he sung in a deep voice.

"I don't suppose you have a third one of those...?" The prince asked preemptively.

"Nope, this is my last pipa, sorry..."

"Good," Vegeta replied before seizing the instrument and snapping in two the same way as before, casually tossing the pieces aside and crossing his arms...only for the musican to seemlessly pull a different intrument out of nowhere.

"Good thing I brought a sitar!" Chong beemed.

At this, the Saiyan instantly fell to the ground anime-style.

The group stared at him awkwardly as he got up."How'd you fall over?" Aang wanted to know.

"Oh nothing, just paralyzed by a blast of pure stupid..." Vegat blew it off, fully upright.

"Wow, I didn't know you could get hurt by something like that. Is that a weakness of a your species?" Katara wondered.

Once again, Sokka face-palmed.

"Is _that_ a weakness of _your_ species?" Vegeta retorted, gesturing to the boy.

"mmNo, it's mostly Water Tribe-exclusive..." was the girl's response as the sound of rumbling machinery echoed throught the crevice.

The group turned around to see several steam-powered tanks in the distance barreling straight towards them.

 _"Blast, they found me!"_ thought Vegeta.

"Oh, so that's where that's where that smoke was coming from..." Chong realized.

"What!?" Sokka inquired,"You mean you _saw_ the smoke? Why didn't you say anything!?" he lunged into the musician's face.

"I dunno, I just thought it might be some smoke-breathing, mountain monster..." the hippie explained.

"You mean...it wasn't a campfire?" the fat one asked slowly.

The bald child turned over to Chong."So, all you need is love to get throught the caves?"

"That's correct, master Arrowhead..." Chong confirmed.

The boy's glance shifted towards the waterbender, seemingly mesmerized by the older girl even from behind.

Chong and Lily faced each other and smiled deeply.

Vegeta noticed the fat one standing next to him was gazing upon him romanticly as well; his face lost some color...

"Everyone into the hole!" Sokka commanded, the rest following (with the Saiyan quickening his pace).

As soon as they were at least sixty feet into the tunnel, they heard futher rumbling as they whelled around and saw the entrance crumbling behind them, their light scoucre being gradually cut off until it was completely dark...

As soon as Chong lit a torch, the bison, apparently afraid of caves for an unknown reason, was seen franticly searching for a another exit, digging at the pile of rocks with his clawless feet.

"It's okay Appa we'll be fine...I hope..." Katara tried to comfort the animal.

"Hey, Vegeta..." Aang hatched an idea,"maybe if you're recovered, you and I could combine our airbending to blast our way out of this cave!"

"I already told you, boy, I'm not an airbender! And believe me, if I were recovered, you'd know..." the Sayain retorted, crossing his arms.

"I'm just tossing ideas around..." Aang replied.

"Don't worry, Vegeta, I'm sure you'll get your powers back soon..." Katara tried to comfort Vegeta, using the exact same tone as on Appa

"Riiiight. Any way, Chong, how long do those candles last?" Sokka asked

"Eh 'bout two hours each..." he said.

"And we have five torches, so that's..." Lily gathered all the canldes and lighted them all at once,"ten hours!"

The teen balked, then snatched the candles and stomped them out."It doesn't work like that if they're all lit at the _same time!_ "

" _Ohhhh_ , right..." the woman realized.

"Somehow, I doubt this world will be known for its logic puzzles..." Vegeta lamented, shaking his head.

"Oh yeah? What's your world known for, Space-Man?" Sokka retorted.

"Wait till the next full moon and you'll find out!" the Saiyian replied, stomping over to the teen.

"Guys! Seriously!" Aang interjected, his hands raised pleadingly; he sighed."Look, Sokka, you should make a map to keep track of where we've been. Then we should be able to solve it like a maze and get through." he explained.

"Good-thinking," Sokka said, producing a piece of paper,"Who's got a pen?"

"I have one!" the fat one beamed, taking one out from his underwear.

Vegeta twitched, _"This is going to be a looong enterprise..."_

* * *

It felt as if hours had gone by, though it was only about fifteen minutes, not that being trapped underground with some new-age fops made life more pleasant. And as if Fate (Be he Kaio-sama or Little Green) couldn't be more cruel, the closest hippie's name in question just happened to be _"Moku"_ \- one letter away from his arch-nemesis, who was probably laughing at him from up there; or perhaps the clown felt jealous of him, as sick as his low-class mind was. It didn't, however, take any more than five minutes for the prince to decide he was sick of these hippies in general, particularly the one called Chong; the Sayian would have felt welcome to brake his latest instrument, but he really didn't care to see how many more he was concealing.

Vegeta could, at least for the time being, distract himself with the intellectual discussion taking place...

"Are we there yet?" Chong asked.

"No," Vegeta replied mundanely.

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

 _"No..."_

"Are we there yet?"

 _"No.."_

"Are we there yet?"

" _NO..."_

"Are we there yet?"

 _"NO...!"_

"Well how do you know? You're just as lost as I am..." the musician reminded.

The Vegeta spun around."THEN WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME!?" he demanded.

The skinny hippie shrugged."I just thought we were playing _twenty-questions..._ "

The Saiyan stared at the man befuddled for a few moments... **"FINAL FLASH!"** he roared at top of his lungs as he shoved his cupped hands inches from the hippie's face. Nothing happened, but his sudden blaring voice scared Appa's fur off, causing the huge mammal to go crazy and ram the sides of the wall, causing the tunnel to quake, which in turn caused tons of rocks to fall, saparating the group from Aang and Katara, and not to mention the entrance to/only known exit from the labyrinth.

Sokka began frantically digging through as futility as the bison, who was with the other two now.

Chong calmly put his hand on Sokka's shoulder."Yeah, it's no use. We're separated. But at least you have us," he chuckled.

Sokka looked between him, his group, and Vegeta..."NNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!" he shrieked, clawing at the stone even harder, resulting in a much smaller cave in to cover his head.

The Saiyan blinked."Hm...whoops..."

" _ **Yoouuu**_ _..._ " hiss the teen, turning around and arising menacingly," _You_ did this! We're trapped down here forever because of YOU!"

"Watch your tone, 'Sohka', or else I'll send you to oblivion..." Vegeta crossed his arms.

Lily paused in confusion."But, how can you send us anywhere if we're trapped in a cave forever?"

Sokka charged Vegeta, intending to tackle him, but instead he only ended up hurting his head against Vegeta's Saiyan abs, Sokka's fingers twitching.

"By Dende's antennae, you're pathetic..." Vegeta shook his head, shoving Sokka onto his back.

"At least _I_ didn't cause a cave-in, you maniac!" Sokka snapped.

"Well of course not," Chong said,"The buffalo did it."

"Once I figure out how to kill this guy, you're next!" The teen growled with clutched fists.

"Will you relax?" Vegeta dismissed."You forget you're talking to a Saiyan; I can go through these pebbles in less than a second." he said as he paced over to said pile.

Sokka couldn't palm his face rapidly enough."How many times do I have to say this!? You're NOT a space-man! You don't have any powers!"

"He's from space?" Lily asked.

"Wha-No! I just said he wasn't!"

"What planet are you from?" Moku wondered.

"Planet Vegeta," he answered in a beat.

At this, the teen, again, facepalmed."Seriously!? You came from a world named after you?"

"No, I came from a world named after my father, whom conquered it, whom I am also named after." Vegeta explained.

"Wait, I'm confused," Chong scratched,"Which is Vegeta, the planet, your dad, or you?"

"YES!" Vegeta cried as he swung his gloved fist against the stone, rocking the tunnel with a sound, echoing crack...unfortunately, while the stone was indeed cracked, the endeavor far from effortless.

The Saiyan's eyes were blood shot, his body frozen, his fist twitching."...fffffffffff **FUUUUUUUUUU-!"**

* * *

"Prince Zuko! Watch your language!" Iroh rebuked."We're in the middle of company!"

Zuko glared at Iroh."That wasn't me!"

Song's eyes became quizzical."I thought you said you're name was Lee...?"

The Fire Nation fugitives stared at eachother nervously.

A rather disturbed expression grew on the facee of Song's mother."Did...you just call him... _Prince_ Zuko...?"

The temperature of the living room decreased from the tension.

"RUN!" General Iroh exclaimed.

Zuko and Iroh immediately snatched all the food from the table that they could get their hands on, and dashed out of the small cottage, stealing their ostrich horses and using them to bolt off into the horizon.

* * *

Vegeta rolled around the dirt, snarling out every bad word in the universe he had ever heard.

"...I think that hurt..." Chong deduced.

The brilliant observation earned another face palm from Sokka.

The Saiyan found his body curled up and rocking back and forth like a little child with a paper cut. He yanked his glove off to see the damage...only to be shocked that there was none. Vegeta was dumbfounded, there wasn't a single scratch on his bare knuckles, yet he felt as though Qui had once again shoved Vegeta's hand into a dark matter meat grinder (Though few were privy to this, he was kind of a loser at King Cold's Middle School for Planetary Conquest)

Sokka hunch over."I tried to warn you; but nobody listens to the guy with no bending..."

"What the hell is this place made of!?" The Saiyan demanded.

"Something really hard," Sokka replied,"it's called 'earth'; and unless you're an earthbender, you can't punch through it."

"You have no right to tell me what I can or can't do, you primitive!" Vegeta barked.

"You're welcome to try again..." Sokka crossed his arms.

Vegeta spun back to look at the wall of boulders; in that moment, it seemed to be even larger than before, and he had merely put a dent in one rock. He halfheartedly spun back."Alright, boy, I see your point; I don't suppose you have a better idea?"

"Look, this labyrinth was carved by _people_ , meaning the tunnels were likely designed to intersect at some points so they wouldn't get lost..." explained Sokka

"Wasn't getting lossed the point of making a labryinth...?"

"Moku! Not helping! All we have to do is navigate through the tunnels until we regroup with Aang and Katara, and make it out of this stupid cave and into Omashu. In the mean-time, we'll just follow Aang's plan and trace our steps with a make-shift map."

"FINE! But _I'm_ making the map!" Vegeta replied, snatching the paper and pen from the teen's hands, pacing forward,"I'm not going to let you idiots drag me along any further..." he concluded on his way.

"Lead the way, veggie-man..." Moku encouraged.

 **One Hour Later...**

 _Oh, don't let the cave get you down..._

Chong played on with his sitar...

 _Don't let the falling rocks turn-you-smi-le intoafrown..._

 _When the tunnels are darkest, that's when you need a clown-HEY!_

 _Don't let the cave get you down, Space Maaaaaaan..."_ he leaned over to the scowling Sayian as he stopped for now.

"... _Is there any song you know that_ ISN'T about CAVES!?" Vegeta growled.

The musician held his chin in contemplation for a second...

 _Oh I'm a gopher-bear..._

 _Yes I'm a gopher-bear!_

 _I'm a fuzzy, chubby, cabbage-eating gopher-bear!_

Vegeta's head hung low...

 **Two Hours Later...**

"Oh great, your plans have led us straight to another dead-end!" Moku complained, as even he had grown weary of the song's.

"At least we're thinking of ideas, _Moku..."_ Sokka retorted.

"Whoa, Whoa, wait a mintue, we're thinking of ideas? 'Cause I've had an idea for, like, an hour now..."

Sokka slowly pressed his palm against his face, then slowly dragged his fingers down his lips."Yes, Chong, We're all _thinking_...OF IDEAS!" he reminded.

"Well listen to this: if _love_ is the key out of hear, then all we need to do is play a love song!" he speculated, playing his instrument once more.

Sokka eyed Vegeta."How hard can you smack someone else's face?"

"Throw in an extra ten zeni, and I'll send your disembodied head flying..." Vegeta answered.

Suddenly the ground begins to quake again, catching the attention of the entourage.

Out of nowhere, an enormous furry beast erupted through the wall behind them; then another beast burst through the dead-end.

"BADGER MOLES!" Moku whaled.

The other players dropped their instruments in terror.

While Vegeta was momentarily taken off guard, he snorted and tossed the map aside."Oh what, you think I'm intimidated by these over-grown rats?" he assumed a battle posed

"What part of 'you have no almighty space-powers' do you not understand!?" Sokka reminded fearfully.

"Please, even without my ki, I've still been endowed with the natural dexterity of a Saiyan Super-Elite!"

A second later, the badger mole in front decided to stomp over to Vegeta and back-handed him into a wall.

Vegeta was sprawled against the wall, his "dexterous" body forming an impression in the stone."Grrfltpnighulserfn...mem..." he mumbled as he gradually slipped from the earth and flopped onto the ground. Vegata strenously pushed himself beck into concsousness, soon enough to notice a giant shadow looming over him. The Saiyan shook the dizziness out of his head and jumped to his feet."It's going to take a lot more than a huge furry bitch-slap to falter the pride of a Saiyan...!" He announced as he epically lunged into the beast fact with a cocked fist, only to be slapped again, sent screaming and rolling down the tunnel...Vegeta then sprung from the darkness with another might yell, again assaulting the huge monster, resulting in him being sent tumbling down to the tunnel again...then he dashed out from the darkness and charged the giant badger again, only to be again sent rolling down the tunnel...this pattern continued on like clockwork.

The other badger mole swerved its large head towards Sokka with a quizzical glance.

"Don't look at me; I just met the guy..." Sokka dismissed.

Fed up with this repetition, the other badger mole made sure its next swing would come from above smashing the incoming Saiyan into the ground, leaving him once again stuck in the rock.

"You just wait till I reach my final form..." Vegeta hazily threatened.

With Vegeta dealt with, the badger mole smack him back against the wall, while the other badger mole isolated the teen from the group with earthbending. It sent a shockwave that knocked Sokka into the wall near Vegeta. Sokka crawled backwards, nearing the Saiyan as both moles closed in; however, Sokka's arm happened to come across something on the away - another one of Chong's guitars. His finger accidentally grazed one of the strings, the tune echoing through out the cave; the beast stopped growling as they heard it. Vegata and Sokka paused in confusion until they realized the truth...

"H-Hey! They're music lovers!" Chong vocalized.

Sokka immediately grabbed the instrument and repeatedly stroked the same string, singing off the top of his head as he did so..." _Badger moooles, coming toward me; com'on guuuys, help me out..._ "

That was all the teen could muster before the Saiyan rented the sitar from his grasp."Give me that, you moron! CAN'T YOU PLAY FOR YOUR LIFE!?"

The pair of beast were clearly aggravated at Vegeta for interrupting Sokka's song; noting this, the prince immediately began rapidly striking random cords on the sitar with all his fingers, and began singing the first lyrics that popped in his head,:" _Mysteries abound, made up a deep energy,_ _Foes all around, but I will go fearless and free..."_

The animals were far more intrigued by this new song...

* * *

It wasn't long before the whole group was riding the two beast, all happily playing and singing in unison along with Vegeta...

 _"Don't stop, Don't stop, we're in luck now!_

 _Don't stop, there's so much to be found!_

 _We can find paradise,_

 _All we have to do is go! go! Free your sooooooouuuuuul,_

 _DRAGON SOOOOOUUUUUULL!"_

As soon as they stopped playing, the two moles exploded through one more wall finally reaching the outside. They instantly noticed Aang, Katara, and Appa stading before them in awe.

Sokka and Vegeta slid down the moles; the teen ran excitedly while the Saiyan took his time.

"How'd you get out?" Sokka wondered.

"It's just like the legend says: we let love lead the way..." Aang left explained.

"Really? We let huge ferocious beasts lead the way..." Sokka said, waving the bedger moles goodbye along with the band, the beasts rentering the caves and sealing their exit with earthbending.

Chong placed a friendly hand on Vegata's shoulder."I gotta admit, Vegeta, despite what was said in that tunnel earlier, you truly have to be one of the greatest singers in the universe..." he said warmly, removing his flowery necklace and hanging it around the Saiyan's neck,"Although, I'm not gonna lie, you were really startin' to annoy the crap outta me..."

All the Prince had to offer in return was his blankest expression yet... "...Just leave now..."

Chong bowed in repsect."As you command..." he then departed with the other hippies as he sung _Cha la Head Cha la_ to himself, prompting Vegeta to do double-take.

A little while later, the kids, bison, lemur and Saiyan were pacing up a small hill.

"Well actually, it's more like a plateau..." Vegeta replied.

"What?" Sokka asked.

"Nothing."

Sokka payed no mind."Well, the journey was long and annoying, but now you get to see what it's really about: the destination..." he announced, speeding up to the top,"Vegeta, I present to you, the city of O...oh no..."

The group soon saw what his shock came from. As they stood on the top, they could see a huge mountain-like city spewing with smoke and surrounded in a large metalic wall, where the banner of the Fire Nation hung for all to see...

"...Seems pleasant..." Vegeta said off-handedly.


	3. You Don't Know Whachyoo Got till it's

"SEEMS PLEASANT!?" Sokka gawked at the Saiyan, lunging into his face,"Are you kidding me!? You think THAT'S a pleasant-looking city!? Do you have any idea how NOT pleasant the Fire Nation is!? If you were to compare how pleasant the Fire Nation is to a tree, it'd be the most _rotten,_ _ **putrid**_ tree in a forest FULL of rotten, putrid trees! I mean one o' the rotten trees would be like,'Hey, ew, look at how ugly that tree is; I feel far less rotten and putrid just by glancing at it!', and then another tree would turn to the first tree and be all like,'Hey, I hear that tree cheated on his tree wife and then tree raped her just 'cause he felt like it,' and then incredible rumors would spread across the whole decaying forest like wildfire until your left with nothing but an entire forest full of gossiping, leprous trees!" Sokka finished, frozen in an over dramatic pose, peering into the warrior's eyes.

Vegeta meerly stood there with his arms crossed."...What is wrong with your voice?" he finally asked, completely unaffected by the teen's high-pitch rant.

Suddenly, Sokka flopped to the ground anime-style.

Sokka lifted himself up on his arms, totallly befuddled."What...What the heck just happened to me?"

"It seems you were so overwelmed with frustration, you temporarily lost all voluntary muscle control; that'll probably happen more often from here on..." speculated Vegeta.

Katara sighed."Sokka, we keep telling you, Vegeta's from space; he doesn't know anything about the War."

While Sokka would have normally hit himslef in the head at such a declaration, the teen felt oddly more sober after allowing every muscle in his entire body to spasm simultaneously, so he settled with sighing and propping his chin on his hand."Of course, my bad..."

Katara began to explain."Vegeta, for the past hundred years, the Fire Nation has waged a full-scale war with the whole world in a mad bid for total domination of our planet; they've taken over cities, burned down countless villages, and even wiped out the Air Nomads!" she told him, gesturing to the bald child,"They also took my mother away..." she added mournfully.

After the Saiyan spared a moment to take this in, he scoffed." _pttf,_ I can top that: My entire race was single handedly eradicated in five mintues by a short, transsexual lizard dwarf who treated the universe like it was his backyard! I to this day still haven't the slightest idea how Nappa survived..." he lamented, staring into space.

The boy blinked in realization."Wait a minute, you mean, your whole race was wiped out?"

Sokka then felt it time to arise to his feet, wiping the dirt off his clothes."No, Aang, his race was not wiped out, because he is _not_ from space, he does _not_ have any special powers, and there is _no such thing_ as other worlds," he stated firmly, facing Vegeta.

"I'm _really_ starting not to care for your ignorance..." warned the Saiyan.

The two stared down with a thousand-yard glare, which was rather peculiar considering they were standing merely several inches apart from eachother.

"Sokka, Vegeta is our new friend, there's no reason to engage..." Aang started slowly.

"And if by 'ignorance', you mean 'I think you're full of komodo furtilizer' then you can bet I'm the most ignorant person on the planet, aside from you, that is..." Sokka prodded.

Vegata leaned in closer, cocking his head to the right."You are aware I graduated from Freiza University with a major in planet bursting?"

"I don't see how that should worry me: _I'm_ not a planet..." Sokka replied.

"Sokka, stop it! You're going to give our species a bad reputation!" Katara pleaded.

"Listen to me, you worthless runt..." Vegeta started.

" _'Runt!?'_ " Sokka scoffed," You're one to talk; we're the exact same height!"

It was this comment that caused the Saiyan's scowl to breifly vanish as it had before, taking more brain power than usual to process the teen's reply; when it was fully comprehended, he mindlessly tackled the Water Tribe boy to the ground.

Vegeta had his strong, muscular hands rapped around Sokka's narrow throat, forcing the teen to poke Vegeta in the eyes with his fingers and head-butted the prince in the nose; though this caused the Saiyan's death-lock to relent, they still continued to wrestle, rolling and grunting across the plateau.

"Sokka! No! Please!" Katara cried out.

The two tumbled over a cliff and into a tree, which shook violently as they brawled within its leaves; they eventually fell out apart from eachother.

"You...You TAKE THAT BACK!" Vegeta stamered, his hair haggard and dizzily arising to his feet.

"Make me!" Sokka cried, his pony tail unraveled to reveal his long, messy mane; he unsheathed his boomerang and hurled it at Vegeta.

The Saiyan deflected the projectile away with a swipe of his arm, and, out of pure space-instinct, forced his palms toward his opponent as if to fire a ki blast - which exactly what happened: the small ball of energy flew into Sokka's abdomen and knocked him off his feet.

 _"ugh, What? I..."_ he realized, looking at his hands.

The girl and bald child were speechless as they viewed it all from the edge.

"Um, Vegeta, could you do that again? I think the sun somehow got in my eyes despite the fact that I was clearly looking down," the boy requested.

"Vegeta, your bending is back!" Katara beamed, clasping her fingers together in a fashion stereo-typical of her particular character,"Wow, I've never seen bending so beautiful before..." yep, no dynamic traits over here...

While the teen was momentarily a gust, he quickly stood upright and resumed his own static nature."Well big deal, so he can shoot sunlight out of his hands, it still doesn't prove he's from space," he concluded, dusting his torso off, "Besides, it didn't exactly make any mountains disappear; and we're not gonna beat the Fire Lord by pushing him over..." though his comment was finished, his voice was soon drowned out by the slowly growing laughter of the Saiyan prince, who had apparently completely ignoring the children out of sheer joy of firing his first actual ki-ball in, well, it was really only about thirty-six hours since his crash-landing, but for the Saiyan, it felt as if he were a savage polar bear just awakening from a long hibernation...

Wait a second, polar bears don't hibernate...aw, screw it, back to the story...

"Yes, Yes! I knew this ailment couldn't have lasted! The Prince of Saiyans has returned!" Vegeta revelled, pumping his fists in the air.

"I thought you were the last of your kind..." Sokka reminded snidely

"Oh, shut up! It's the principal that matters..." Vegeta responded, staring out into space in that way that somehow makes him look cool, "Besides, that little ball I threw at you is literally nothing compared to the power of most races: you people are truly refuse; and now that I have even a splint of my ki, I don't need you anymore..." the Saiyan announced ruthlessly, walking off into the distance his gaze was directed towards, which just happened to be the newly-conquered city of Omashu.

"Wait, your leaving?" Katara asked,"But, we barely know anything about you or your culture; I mean, you're literally the _last_ member of your species; you're like the hand extended from the precipice of your dying world, desperately crying out for its story of life to be heard. Even if, somewhere out in the universe, there were some young, sovereign child roughly Aang's age who possessed Saiyan blood from one side of his family and even were just as powerful or even more powerful than the entirety of your race combined, it still wouldn't count. Isn't there some quality of your people that stands out from the universe; or at the very least, an account of the hardships and sufferings of your own personal journey throughout the cosmos?"

The Saiyan pondered all of this deeply..."...nupe..." he said nonchalantly, continuing his walk.

The three stood and watched the blue-clad warrior fade away into the landscape.

"Guys, let's just forget about him; we've got to find a way to get into the city..." Sokka began.

* * *

It could well have been considered night by the time the Saiyan had passed half a mile within the city gates, having trekked across the bridge spanning the distance between the city itself and the point where he left the annoying children.

Vegeta still wasn't able to fly, but he crossed the path silently and without complaint; he thought the walk might be good for his ki, which he was going to need very soon, as the Saiyan was nearing the iron gates, the lookouts spotting him long before he them, and the two guards at the gates were fully prepared for a confrontation, but Vegeta was not worried: he was prepared as well...

"Halt, trespasser! What business do you have here!?" one of the guards demanded, pointing an accusing finger; they were clearly not happy to see a man clad in blue with the limits of the city, let alone anything but red...

"Have no fear, I am not here to harm you..." _"...for tonight..."_ Vegeta kept the last part in his mind,"I am but a humble traveler wishing to reload on some supplies from your great city," _"...which I will blow up soon after..."_ he continued to think, attempting to walk passed them.

The two "firebenders" immediately shifted into their special stances."Not one inch further!" the other guard replied."We're going to have to see some qualification!"

Vegeta rolled his eyes. While he was sure he could take these to men out seamlessly, there was no telling how many more sentries were watching him at this point, an he still did not want to take a chance with these inhabitants; the only way to get pass the guards was to convince them to allow him passage. Speaking of which, this reminded the Saiyan of a similar scenario that he had the pleasure watching on earth television, he wondered if it could be employed with some ki...

"You don't _need_ to see to my qualification..." Vegeta sounded eriely, waving his hand in an attempt to place his influence upon them.

The guards paused, their tension lowered."What? of-Of course we do! You're just some strange man that's walking around in the middle of the night!" the first guard concluded.

"... _no_ , you don't..." the warrior tried it again.

"Yes we do. Why do you think cities have guards!?" the second guard inquired.

"... _Noooo_ , you DON'T!" Vegeta tried harder.

" _Yeeees_ , we DO!" the first guard mocked, waving his own hand."Honestly, you're making a fool out of yourself. If you don't have any qualification, just turn around and come back when you get some!" he finalized, pointing back beyond the Saiyan.

Vegeta slapped his forehead; he should've figured there was only one way through these doors."Fine, just give me a minute..." the Saiyan search with in his imaginary back pockets for some qualification."hmm, let's see here...it's gotta be somewhere I know I...oh my, well this is embarrassing, it seems I must've left it in my **GALLICK GUN!"** Vegeta roared, quickly cupping his hands together and shoving them in front the guards...only succeeding in creating a poof of purple, glowing mist that did no harm whatsoever. The three pairs of eyes watched the mist dissipate into little sparkles that floated to the earth, vanishing into nothing; they stared at the ground for a moment...

Vegeta's pupils gradually climbed their way back up to the guards, whom were not quite sure what to make of this "display of power".

The first guard's face scrunched up in distain."That was the _worst_ firebending I've ever seen! That's it! You're under arrest!" he announced.

"w-Wait wha NO-!" was what the prince cried before being seized away by his wrists and shoulders.

* * *

Before Vegeta knew where he went wrong, he was stripped down to his underpants and strung by his ankles with a long chain, dangling upside-down as he was raised to a height of at least fifty feet in the air, staring down at a few smug Fire Nation faces. "YOU INSOLENT VERMIN! I'LL KILL EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU!" the Saiyan bellowed.

"That'll be enough out of you, bad firebender!" a familiar guard exclaimed."I'd rather face the Fire Lord himself then to allow you to taint this city with your ineptness! We get too much from those crazy earthbender rebels as it is!" he finished, shaking his fist.

Apparently, learned the hard way as usual, bad firebending was considered a great offense to firebenders, so much as to have the offender be humiliated in such a way as Vegeta, as an effort to promote perfection among the servants of Fire Lord Ozai; atleast Frieza was decent enough to simply wipe out races he didn't like...

The other guard had an apiphany."Hey, speaking of the Fire Lord, did you hear that Princess Azula is coming to Omashu for a tour?"

Guard #1 brightened up."No way! Really?"

"Yeah!" #2 confirmed,"I heard she should be hear by tomorrow afternoon..."

The two guards walked away as they talked about it, leaving Vegeta to himself...

...That is, until the Saiyan swung a glance to his right to see that he in fact was not the only one being suspended by a chain in this particular spot, only this one had the luxury of being hung right-side up; it was a rather senile-looking old man, trapped within the confines of a metal case - Vegeta could tell he was old man due to his face being the only exposed portion of his own personal cell. Well, it was going to be a long night out here, so he might as well be the one to start a conversation, perhaps even strike up an alliance and plot to escape..."...So, what are you up here for?" Vegeta finally asked.

The elderly gentlemen flashed him a mad grin."I'm the king of Omashu!" he beamed.

The Saiyan felt the bridge between his eyes. _"It's the cave all over again..."_

* * *

As expected, the Saiyan prince hung up there all night long with no sleep, his head as red as an apple from all the alternate blood-flow to his brain, which actually allowed him to think much clearer, which only succeeded in him remaining awake through the darkness while receiving an agonizingly thorough explanation for each of what his new friend Bumi referred to as "the eighty-five jins" - the Saiyan could've sworn that the old man surppassed the eighty-five mark roughly six hours ago, but didn't dare imply that the so-called "king" should start over. All the while, the Saiyan peered up at the three quarter-full moon, with all his might willing his body to transform into the mighty Oozaru and go on a mindless rampage across the countryside; but alas, for two obvious reasons, that concept was but a dream. It didn't matter at this point: the old man had ceased speaking fifteen minutes ago, the dawn of morning clawing its way up the horizon; and while the Saiyan liked to entertain the possibility that the elder's heart had stopped within that span of time, that wish was once again reduced to a dream...

"So..." Bumi began anew, "You say your name is Vegeta...?"

"I did..." Vegeta replied, though wondering when exactly he related his name.

There was another pause...

"...Know what that sounds like?"

"I know what it sounds like..." the Saiyan responded quickly, inwardly begging that little Namekian that this man had not come across the connection-

"Vegetable!"

 _"Curse you, Magic Man!"_ Vegeta grimaced mentally.

The old man chuckled."So how did ya end up with a name like that? Did ya shoot outta' the ground when you were a baby?"

 _"Something like that..."_ Vegeta lamented."For your information, old man, I was named after my father, who established himself as king of the Saiyan race and, in one night, overthough an the entirety of Planet-" his lips tightened, knowing where he was walking right into...

"Planet..." Bumi waited, his wrinkly grin spreading.

The Saiyan's face contorted as he resisted the urge to reveal the original name of his long forgotten home world; but sadly, it was too late."... **Plant** _..._ " he vomited the words out of his mouth.

The old man burst into a fit of laughter."Named after your father, ey? He sounds like a pretty tough vine! I'm happy to see his _seed_ lives on!" he howled.

Every word of the old man hurt worse than when Frieza shot through his chest with his Death Beam.

"So, what's your brother's name?" the self-proclaimed king inquired.

Vegeta scowled even further."That's none of your business...!"

"Ooh, don't tell me! Is it Fruit? Or, Tarble? As in: Vege _Tarble_!?" the geezer exploded with a mad cackle full of snorts.

The prince hit a critical temperature by now." You listen to me, you wrinkled waste of oxygen: If you make one more produce joke about my family, I'll swing over there and rip your head out of that ridiculous metal box!" he warned.

The elder still giggled."Alright, I'll stop! Jeez! All you had to do was tell me if you didn't care for what I was..." he stopped, making sure the prince got this last one.

Vegeta's eyes bugged out, stupafied at this man's audacity."Don't. You. _Dare_..."

Bumi's smile widening from one ear to the other."...saiyan..."

* * *

"I tell you, your highness," the governor began, walking along side Princess Azula, who was being carried via palanquin, as they walked through the former Earth King's courtyard,"You will never forget your stay here at Omashu; true, there are many building sites yet to be completed - the memorial statue of your father being our top proje..." though the official's banter had gradually melted away as the area resonated with the distant sound of elongated yelling from some other part of the city, naturally perplexing all the men present.

The princess smirked sisterly."Actually, I think I'll enjoy my stay just fine..."

* * *

The Space warrior had to take a moment to regain his air after screaming so powerfully, breathing slowly and audibly.

The old man's exposed face cringed the whole time."Wow, you've got _some_ lungs there, Space Man! I bet even the Avatar heard that one..." he complemented

 **"I WILL INCINER-!...** the ava-what?" Vegeta paused, his unbridled rage somehow counter-acted by this new terminology.

Bumi shook his head as bst he could."Not Ava-what, Ava _tar_ ; you know? Master of all four elements?"

"What, is that some pagan god you people worship?" the Saiyan queried.

The elder remembered."Oh right, you're from that vegetabe planet, so you don't know who that is..."

The prince glared daggers."I will tree rape you..."

Bumi ingnored him, continuing in a suprisingly prudent tone:"The Avatar is the sage guardian of our world; his primary pupose in life is to maintain an ever-lasting balance and harmony around the earth - he is a great and powerful being, the strongest bender on earth!" he announced.

Vegata snorted."If he's so mighty, then how do you explain the century of war?" he wondered, the humorous atmosphere of this story finally waning.

"I'd really like to, but the Avatar mysteriously disappeared a short while before the War had even begun, and it remains raging on unquenched...but there is indeed hope, for the Avatar has returned; and though he has his work cut out for him this time around, he will eventually restore the balance to this war-torn world," he finished, looking out onto the horizon thoughtlessly.

" _Too bad Sozin's Comet's this summer..._ " added a droll, female voice.

The two prisoners paused, and reverted their eyes down (up for Vegeta)wards to see a young girl wearing a long, heavy red baggy garments with sleeves extending beyond her arms; her jet-black hair was neatly tied into pigtails that completely contrasted her facial expression, which was so dead she might as well've not been alive, something she probably dreaded herself.

"So you're supposed to be that bad firebender that tried to sneak into the city last night? That's boring; and I guess regular firebending is boring, your bending must be supremely boring..." she breathed.

And with that, the humor waxed anew, agitated Saiyan and all."I'm _not_ a bender, you bratty goth: I'm a Saiyan!"

"I couldn't care less if you were a 'super' Saiyan - you're boring either way..." she sighed,"oh well, shouldn't've expect less. It was boring meeting you; maybe Azula is here to kill me - at least that'll put an end to all the boredom..." the girl flicked her sleeved hand as she resumed her walk of perpetual boringness.

Vegeta gazed down(up) at the girl, utterly confounded by her irreverence; Bumi, on the other hand, seemed to be formulating an idea. He called for the girl and smiled."Hey! Ya wanna know what _wouldn't_ be boring!? If my friend here _'conveniently_ ' broke free so he could run a muck all over the city!"

The girl stopped, turning her attention back to the Saiyan."That _does_ sound pretty not boring..." she smirked. She then produced a knife that was hidden within her sleeve, and gracefully hurled it through the air; the small blade darted passed the chain suspending the half-naked warrior, cleanly severing it in an instant.

"Oh, Dende, not agaaAAAAAAH-!" the Saiyan whaled as he plunged down like a lead balloon, destined to slam head-first onto the cold, merciless pavement. The terrified prince desperately tried to gather whatever miniscule puddle of energy within his body and force it out in bleak effort to proppel himself forward. It kind of worked: the Saiyan stopped short in midair, remaining still like a speeding car driver that hit the brakes, coincidentally at eye-level with the dry-eye girl.

"HAH! IN YOUR FA-!" his gloating was cut off as he plopped to the ground. The Saiyan groggily arose to his feet, taking a moment to allow the his blood-flow to rearrange itself accordingly. " _Right_ , so, I never caught your name..."

The teen stared unfazed by this strange display."My name is Mai; I'm the daughter of the guy who governs the city, not that he cares..."

At this, Vegeta cocked his eyebrow, grinning slyly."Ya don't say...?"

"Yeah, so go ahead and make with the terrorizing; I can't wait to see the look on those guards' fac-" she was immediately socked in the face.

Vegeta seized the dizzy girl by her arm, wrapped his foot chains around her waist and legs at a flashing speed, and flipped her upon his bare shoulder, thought his didn't appear to unnerve the girl. The Saiyan turned his eyes back up to the old man."My salutations to you, Bumi; when I regain my power, I'll see to it you rule this planet with an iron fist."

The elder seemed preoccupied with a long strain of mucus that hung from his left nostril, which he then snorted back into his sinus cavity."whawazat?" he inquired, not listening.

The prince blinked, looking away."...I can make no promises..." he concluded, running off with the girl.

* * *

Cut to two familiar Fire Nation guards, sitting at a table playing pai sho with eachother.

"Hey, I just remembered something: shouldn't we be watching that prisoner we caught last night?" Guard#2 recalled.

Guard #1 chuckled to himself."Right, like that guy's gonna cause us any more trouble. Besides, who cares if a firebender that bad escapes? It's not like there's going to be some special twist that'll suddenly make not only our lives but the lives and welfare of our loved ones heart-poundingly dependent upon his capture..."

"JINX!" Vegeta exclaimed as he blurred past the two, carrying Lady Mai over his shoulder.

The pair of firebenders were awstruck.

"Aww soot, let's get'em!"

* * *

It wasn't long before the Saiyan found himself fleeing from a dozen firebenders; a combination of fireballs, swords, and spears flew from behind him and swiped passed him, narrowly missing eachtime.

"Oh yeah, guys, just keep throwing stuff at him; don't even think about how you might hit me..." Mai commented sarcasticly.

Two construction workmen were carrying a large wooden plank over their heads; the one in front froze upon seeing a manic-looking indecently dressed man with wild hair sprinting in his direction, followed by a squad of soldiers.

"What's the hold up, Do Mat?" the worker in behind asked, right before Do Mat fled for his life, his end of the board dropping to the ground.

This allowed the Saiyan to dash up the plank like a ramp and leap into the air, kicking his way through a second-story window, terrifying an old lady who was just rising out of bed. After he ran out of the bedroom, the crone flipped the covers, revealing an old man who was still asleep; she promptly slapped the man to awareness.

"What'd _I_ do!?" The husband demanded.

Vegeta bolted through the apartment; three firebenders blasted the front door down with no intention of paying for it. His way blocked, the Saiyan threw a tiny ki ball at them, stunning the middle one while the other two marveled." 'Bad firebending' _that!_ " the prince cried smugly as he darted across the living room and lunged out the window. He ended up in someone else's apartment; he ran passed a startled artist who was painting images on a hand-molded clay pot. A spit-second after, the pot was decimated by a fireball that flew from the first apartment

"Oh come on! AGAIN!?" The potter exclaimed, now baring a sense of what that cabbage merchant must've felt like last winter...

The prince bounded out the third window, though he quickly realized there was no third apartment to crash into. The Saiyan plummeted down into the street, coincidentally landing butt-first onto the saddle of a poorly-restrained ostrichhorse. The sudden shock caused the animal to frantically gallop down the street.

The rider of the bird was just walking out of the bar restroom, adjusting his trousers; he gasped in horror."Help! I've been bird-jacked!" he yelped as four firebenders on komodorhinos thundered past him.

The prince - Mai still over his shoulder - grappled the flapping reigns of the giant bird ,doing his best to control it. He turned to see his pursuers.

The soldiers continued to hurl fireballs at him - again, disregarding Mai.

"YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME ALIVE, COPPERS!" the Saiyan spontaneously shouted, shooting little ki projectiles at them through his finger, as if his hand were a revolver.

"Um, I know you're just gonna ignore me like everybody else does, but do you even have the faintest idea about how you're gonna get out of the city in one piece?" Mai inquired calmly, still as monotone as before.

"I'm actually just waiting it out until I have enough energy to blow up the planet..." the Saiyan explained in an equally droll tone. He fired one more crack shot that nail the front rhino right in the eye, causing it to slow down and make the other riders crash into it; the fourth riders nimbly evaded the pile-up by swerving his rhino into a hard right turn, slamming right into a lamp post. Before the rider cold dismount the beast of burden, the creature, out of pure randomness, exploded in a plum of flame, as if it were an automobile.

The prince grinned."Looks like the po po ain't no moe'..."

All of a sudden, one of the embers from the explosion landed on the ostrichhorse's tail feather, its whole backside inevitably catching fire. The bird shrieked, madly dashing twice as fast, this time uncontrollably.

"Gurwah! No! I can't control it!" the Saiyan announced.

Countless citizens, carriage and on foot alike, scrambled in all directions from the half-naked madman on a flaming ostrichhorse at it blazed down the street like a rocket.

"Oh come on, slow down! Oh, what did that stupid bald kid say!? er, Yap-yip! Yippity-yap-yap!"

Unfornutely, no amount of yippityyapping was going to convince the crazed foul to decrease its velocity; and, as if any other scenario could be the end result of running aimlessy around a city notorious for its steep, vertical structure, The animal flew off the edge of some random ledge (hey that rhymed...), the two slipping off of the bird as it dove down to its doom (heh heh, and alliteration, too...).

The Saiyan and girl fell into a convieniently placed wagon of wheat...

Vegeta slowly emerged from the stems, his hair filled with straw, only to come across another sobering sight: right in front of him was a horde of ragged citizens of varying ages, moaning and limping along mindlessly in one direction, their skin covered in red spots, indicating that the entire city had been smited with some sort of...

"PLAGUE! PLAGUE!" a random guard finished Vegeta's thought.

"Huh, a zombie apocalypse, hate to say I told you so..." Mai gloated emotionlessly, her own head popping out of the wheat.

Upon a second survey of the presumed "zombies", the prince observed that most of them didn't seem to be enduring much agony as expressed, as well as the fact that they all happened to be moving in the exact same direction; from this the Saiyan deduced the people were simply feigning a deathly illness, for what reason he did not know.

Vegeta decided it was time to crawl out of the wagon, jerking his pessimistic hostage with him by the chain; he paced a few yards and latched one of the "victims" by the back of his shirt.

"You!" the prince began,"What manner of perverted flash-mob is afoot here!?"

The middle-aged gentlemen responded by spinning around grabbed the Saiyan's shoulder." _Shh!_ You'll give us away!" the man pleaded."We're only pretending to be sick so the governor will drive us out of Omashu! The Avatar is in the city! He's orchestrating an ecsape!"

A typical anime expression of surprised played over Vegeta's face _."The Avatar!? Here...!?" he thought-_ oops, sorry-he thought."Take me to him!"

"Alright, fine; but you're going to have to look sick too," the man explained, sticking his hand into his pocket and taking out a peculiar little pink octopus-like creature."Here, put this pentupus on your face."

The prince reeled back in horror."WHAT!? Are you insane!? I'm not letting that squishy-thing anywhere NEAR me!" he cried.

"I'll put it on me..." Mai offered, hoping that she really would get poisoned.

The rebel sighed."Listen, pal, I know it's not a very stylish plan, and I'm not too thrilled about it either..." the man was interrupted as the Saiyan rudely brushed passed him, following the people himself.

The Earth Kingdom native shook his head."Freaky-Alien-Genotype..."

The Saiyan flowed with the river of humans all the way through the gate, somehow evading a sighting from the distressed guards; if could have been that they were glad to see the "bad firebender" surrounded by the "disease" and payed him no mind, though it did pose a sharp query as to why they would allow the virtual princess of the city to be whisked off with the victims - Vegeta began to wonder if this Mai was really who she claimed to be...

It was nice again night by the time the citizens had decided they werefar enough from the city to settle, camping for the night. Vegeta paced aimlessly through the crowd; some were propping up tents, cooking their dinner, hugging and cheering in light of their parish victory - the Saiyan was also hearing jabber pertaining journying to some grand city, supposedly the last stronghold against the Fire Nation; Vegeta wondered what kind of a city would be so huge as to dwarf the mountian of a town they were just liberated from. There was, eventually, some gossip about the Saiyan himself; as well as his captive, the group echoing with such murmurs as _'Is that who I think it is?'_ or _'Well I'll be an elephant coi in the desert...'_

As his trek progressed, he noticed a tight gathering of rebels nearby, all eagerly encircling a central object.

 _"That must be him..._ " Vegeta thought, increasing his pace into the crowd.

Whoever this Avatar was, it made sense that he had something to do with Vegeta's ailment - an individual such as this would obviously feel threatened by the coming of a Super Saiyan, and so would be obliged to use whatever powers at hand and strike him down with somekind of ki-crippling technique in an act of defense. The prince pushed through the wall of man and woman. It ought to be a simple objective, the prince thought, to make a deal with the Avatar in which if he revealed to him the antidote - assuming there was one - Vegeta would assist him in reconquering his planetary empire, and then the Saiyan's simply have his space pod recovered and repaired and that'd be the end of it; he threw aside the previous imperative of destroying the planet in vengeance - he did not want to find out the range of the Avatar's energy-draining ability. As the prince neared the center, his mind danced back to the children that allegedly rescued him the crash; he tightened his cheeks at the prospect ever running into them again...

Oh well, thought the Saiyan, like that was ever going to happen...

"One side, weaklings! I've got an appointment to make!" Vegeta growled, shoving past the last line of people."Well, Avatar, it appears we finally me-"

The prince froze solid, not one ligament so much as twitching, every single muscular cord within the confines of his physiology literally halting from failure to contract, right down involuntary one such as his lungs and heart.

"...it...it can't be..." he moaned breathlessly, his cerebrum crashing at the moment it put all the pieces together.

The Saiyan slowly raised a shaky finger the individual at the center of the crowd, who was clearly just as surprised to see him, as well as his two friends.

"...n-no, no no NOO!" the Saiyan whaled."IT CAN'T BE YOU! IT JUST CAN'T BE! **YOUR** THE AVATAR!?" he roared, throwing his finger at the young boy.

Sokka stood transfixed, bewildered at the idea."...What? I'm not the Avatar! Who told you that?"

Vegeta paused, his scowl once again gone; then a tsunami of relief swept the Saiyan away, he kneeled over and sighed loudly, actually laughing a little...

"Aang is," Sokka explained, gesturing to the bald child.

Vegeta stopped laughing...

* * *

The governor and his wife stood out on the balcony as the city once again echoed with a faint, prolonged yell.

"Oh, I hope Tom Tom is alright..." the governor lamented.

"...and Mai too..." his wife added.

"Wait, you mean she's gone too?" the governor asked with genuine surprise

* * *

Vegeta continued his ear-splitting shriek for a second or two, but was interrupted when Katara happily wrapped her arms around him.

"Vegeta! You're back! I thought we'd never see you again and, and...wow..." she mumbled as she for the first time scanned the Saiyan's toned upper body, her hand grazing his well-defined abdominals.

"GET YOUR FILTHY HANDS OFF ME!" the prince roared, violently pushing the girl to the dirt; he threw another wrathful finger, this time at the true Avatar."Alright, I've had it up to my HAIR with you insipid brats and your mind games! What kind of sick game of cat and moose are you playing!? Why don't you just cut the garlic and kill me already!?"

Avatar Aang was clearly alarmed."Vegeta, calm down! I'm not trying to play games with you; all I want is to be your friend." he explained, with a smile that made the boy appear more adorable and harmless than a new-born lambpuppy.

No dictionary in the known universe could describe the murderous, rancorous thoughts fermenting throughout the Saiyans phyche...

"Oh, good, I thought I was the only one who had those..." Mai noted.

For the first time, the trio acknowledged the girl's existence.

"Um, who is this?" Sokka inquired, raising a finger.

The frustrated prince jerked his thumb toward her."Oh, that's just some girl I kidnapped as a hostage when I escaped," Vegeta explained,"She claims to be the governor's daughter, but no one seems to care enough to save her..."

"...or, at least not shoot fire at me..." Mai added.

"Wait, I know you..." Katara recalled, rising to her feet and zealously repressing the memory of Vegeta ever pushing her, rationalizing that she simply tripped over a rock; yes, how clumsy she was..."You're that girl those Earth Kingdom rebels ambushed."

 _"woot!"_ sounded one of the perpetrators in the crowd, pumping his fist high enough to be seen.

"And you're with the Avatar; small world, huh?" the goth replied, crossing her unknowable arms."Can I have my baby brother back now?"

 _" 'Brother'?" the three-_ er, dangit!-the three turned their attention to the small infant coincidentally seated next to Aang.

"No way! This is your brother!?" Katara queried.

"Uh, yeah, I just said that..." Mai reminded.

"Guys, are you getting this!? We have _both_ of the governor's children! Do you know what this means!?" Sokka had an idea.

The Avatar scratched his chin for a moment..."That, we're going to have to return them to their parents and apologize for the mix-up?" he guessed.

Vegeta, Sokka, Mai, and all the Earth Kingdom rebels stared at the boy as if he had grown a beard, an owl crowing somewhere out in the distance...

"What? I think it's a great plan," Katara chirped.

Vegeta and Sokka slammed to the ground anime-style.

"Man that smarts..." the teen groaned, rising to a sitting position and rubbing the back of his sore head.

"You'll get used to it..." Vegeta replied, just sitting.

Mai wriggled her arms out of the chains, hopped over to the infant, and took him up in her sleeves (Seriously, where are her arms!?); she was still placid."Yeah, well, I think what your friend was going to say was that you guys could make somekind of deal where you'd trade me and Tom Tom over for something, like food, or gold..." she vocalized.

"...or my clothes..." the half-naked Saiyan threw in.

"Really?" the Avatar understood,"I dunno, that sounds like something the Fire Nation would do..." he said, looking at his shoes.

"What the Fire Nation would do..." began the resistance leader, who was honestly just standing there idly for five minutes not saying a word until at this very moment,"is dress them up in enemy clothing and put them out on the front line, and then they'd _watch_ ," he emphasized, gaining the forseen reaction."Right now, this trade could be our only oppertunity to rescue the king..."

Vegeta perked up."The king?"

The Avatar turned to him."Yeah, King Bumi."

The Saiyan was utterly flabbergasted; his pupils rolled into his head, and his body once again slapped onto the earth, out cold.

* * *

After Vegeta regained consciousness, the plan was initiated. The Avatar's pet flying lemur was used as a messenger to deliver a letter containing the details for the trade; coincindentally, the Fire Nation governor had sent a hawk with a message of its own, and the two flying animals had a bit of an arial skirmish after soaring into eachother in the dead of night, unbeknownst to either party.

It was decided that the Avatar, his friends, and Vegeta would go alone and meet with the negotiators next morning at an elevated construction site of some statue, the project postponed for that day for obvious reasons.

As they walked along the wood platforming, staring onward with determinaton, Sokka felt it the best time to broach the question...

"Vegeta, how long extactly do you plan to wander around with no clothes on in public?" the teen expressed what was itching him all morning, pushing the restrained Mai along.

"As long as I have to..." the Saiyan, still in his underpants, replied ambitiously, not looking at him.

Katara threw a scowl at her brother."Sokka, will you wind down? Vegeta doesn't have to wear a shirt if he doesn't want to..." she snapped sofly as she ever so subtly fingered the prince's impressive right bicep, though the warrior payed her no mind.

"You know, Vegeta, you don't have to do this..." the Avatar said, wearing a make-shift hat to conceal his arrow; he was carrying the infant,"As a space-alien, you're a neutral by default; you have no obligation to ally with either side of this War..."

Sokka glared angrily at the sky in exasperation

The prince snorted."These lowly maggots declared war on the Saiyan race the moment they removed my gloves..." the warrior hissed with malice,"Just pipe down and focus on the mission at hand..."

"kinda' hard to do that when my baby sister's playing with some pretzo's muscles right in my face..." Sokka grumbled behind his teeth.

The bald child _shush_ 'ed audibly.

As they neared the two individuals on the other end of the platform, Vegeta's keen eye was the first to pick up something off - both of them were teenaged girls, no older than their negative hostage.

 _"Wait a mintute, they sent a couple of girls to oversee the exange? What, are they part of this girl's fraternity? Seriously, between the Avatar and these two children just rule the world!?"_

The one on the right was barely clothed in short pink skirt and something between a tanktop and a braw, also pink, to cover just enough of her chest to make boys curious; her sleeves and legs were draped with some transparent cloth which was a much lighter shade of pink, completing her all-pink wardrobe; she had a long, braided pony tail and a perky smile on her face; she also happened to be carrying a certian blure suit of armor, neatly folded in her arms. The one on the left cotrasted significantly: she opted to don a kind of dark red armor/dress hybrid that covered her whole body, minus her hands, which were tippped with long, sharp fingernails. Her jet black hair was neatly wrapped and tightened as to have not a single hair out of place, with the exception of a pair of long bangs dangling infront of her ears, so finely snipped as to seem they could be used as deadly weapons. On the crown of her head was tied a tight topknot with a golden headpiece shaped like a small flame. Like the first girl, her lipstick-covered mouth gave way to a definate smile, only hers was more akin to an tenacious smirk, not unlike that of a Saiyan, complete with piercing golden eyes; her entire heir was that of both intimidation and dominance. It was by now the prince realized two things: this girl in particular truly did hold a profound position in world politics - the kind of position that determines the fate of the planet itself. The other thing was the realization that her eyesight had to be as keen as the Saiyan's, for she was currently sizing him up as well, inevitibly reaching his own eyes - the two of them were locked in visual combat...

"Hiya, Mai!" the perkier-looking one called merrily, waving her arms.

It was this that actually seemed to unerve the goth, the makings of a grimace dissettling her usual frown."Please kill me now; they're only here for the baby..."

"I'll make a note of that..." Vegeta responded mindlessly.

The two parties stopped their pace, still at least a few dozen yards from eachother. As this happened, a crane at the top of the scaffolding, lowered an annoyingly familiar metal box; it somehow spun around, revealing the cackling face of King Bumi.

"Well, well, Space-Man! I knew that _weed_ run into eachother again!" the geezer sounded.

A visble twitch from the Saiyan..."...and while I'm at it, I'll probably borrow one of your knives..." he said to Mai.

"Do you have our friend?" the intimidating girl called retoricly.

"She's right here." answered the poorly diguised Avatar.

"Yaaaaay!" The pink girl cheered, preparing to dash over to her friend, when suddenly, the red girl snatched her by her hair braid.

"Not so fast, Ty Lee..." the evil one remarked calmly, turning back to the other side,"We want Mai to walk to us! Alone and un-shackled!"

The four looked at eachother; Vegeta nodded.

Sokka then cut the rope restraining the girl, and backed away; though, strangely, even though completely free, the girl didn't move.

"...Well? Go on, you're free now," Sokka reminded.

Mai crossed her arms and looked in a different way."Like I'm walking all the way over there just so Azula can draft me into some slumber-party hit-squad..." she responded drolly.

The red girl giggled."Oh-ho, Mai, you see right through me!" she cried bashfully, flinging her hand.

"A-who-la?" Vegeta inquired.

"Azula: the really scary-looking girl in red; she's the princess of the Fire Nation," the goth explained.

Katara's eyes widened."She's the princess? But, that would make her..."

"Zuko's sister..." Sokka finished with a scowl of his own, though it wasn't nearly as cool as Vegeta's.

"Yep, she's probably here to get me to help her hunt him down or that kinda' crap..." Mai comtinued.

The Saiyan in question once again swapped his own glare for a quizzical look."Why would she need _your help_ in partcular; she has an entire military at her disposal."

"Because I'm the best damn knife thrower in all of the Fire Nation."

"It's true; she is!" Azula confirmed.

"Awww, c'mon, Mai, what did Azula ever do for you to have such a black aura around her!?" the girl named "Ty Lee" asked naively.

The goth rolled her dull eyes."Oh gee, let me put it in chronological order:..." she began counting with her fingers,"There was the time Zuko was banished from the Fire Nation and you made no effort to defend him, the time you used my pet lambpuppy as target practice for your lightningbending, the time you convinced the whole nation I was an airbender just because I cut you in line in the caffeteria, the time you planted a cabbage slug into the boat before we left for Omashu - I _know_ that was you - or how'bout just yesterday, when I was kidnapped in the first place?"

Azula crossed her arms."Please, that last one was completely out of my power..."

Mai shot a death-glare."He ran right past you."

 _ **The previous morning...**_

 _Azula was casually engaging in her usual morning jog, wearing lighter clothing and a headband, humming Eye of the Tiger-dillo to herself, when out of nowhere, a deranged screaming man in his underwear mounted atop a flaming ostrichhorse blew by her, her best friend dangling over his shoulder, followed by a group of soldiers on komodorhinos._

 _Azula took all this into account...but shrugged and decided to jog in the opposite direction..._

 _ **Back to the present...**_

Azula shrugged in a similar manner."I didn't want to get involved in your business..." she explained innocently.

Sokka raised an eyebrow."And, she's your best friend because?"

"Because I'm the faceless accessory to a decedent puppet government..." Mai replied matter of factly.

"Of course you are," Azula agreed patronizingly," Now come over here like a good little pawn..." she gestured with her fingers, like a woman to a dog.

Mai sighed."Fine, but I'm the one who gets to kill Zuko," she finalized as she slowly paced across the platform.

The Avatar smiled eagerly, holding Vegeta's bare shoulder."Isn't this great, Vegeta? Soon Mai will be returned to her family, and then we'll have Bumi to come with us on our adventures!"

At that very split-second, it was as if time stopped, the horrific realization finally manifesting itself before his eyes. The Saiyan's imagination was bombarded by nightmares pertaining to happy sing-a-longs and bad vegetable jokes while trapped on a flying bison for potentialy the rest of his life...

Vegeta blinked... **"NOOOOOOO!"** the prince swung his fist into Mai's temple, knocking her out instantly.

"Vegeta, what a-!" the bald child could not fully accentuate his shock as the Saiyan snatched the baby from his hands, allowing the infant to dangle by his leg; Vegeta then produced a ki ball in his free hand, holding it dangrously close to the child's head.

"That's it! I've had enough of this ignorance!" Vegeta announce, his own voice trembling in a mixture a fear and rage," If I don't see my armor on _this_ side of the platform in the next ten seconds, the boy dies! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME!?" the area echoed as the prince finished his rant...

The atmosphere dripped with raw silence; the Aang, Katara, and Sokka stood there hunched with their mouths hung open; Azula, Ty Lee, and Bumi were both like statues...

"...ooookay then..." Azula broke the silence with a clap of her hands,"I suppose the deals off; take the king back!" she commanded whoever was managing the crane, the metal box raising into the air; Ty Lee then sadly turned around, taking the Saiyans battle-suit with her.

"That does it! I warned you...!" the prince reminded, preparing to carry out his threat. But, for some reason, when he turned his attention to the infant, his focus at that juncture seemed to take an alternate direction. The Saiyan watched the child in his hand; though it hung helplessly with its ankle betwixt the merciless warrior, the boy actually started giggling as babies do, seemingly entertained by the ball of light. Vegeta was puzzled: this sight wasn't so much uncommon in the life of a former space-mercenary; in fact, it usually annoyed him, but now...Vegeta felt...a sort of ease of mind - the first in days now. As Vegeta peered at the child, his tiny fingers ever trying to grapple the ki ball, he couldn't help but admit to himself this boy reminded him of the previous planet, of quiet times, of an easier life, of a bed to sleep on, of...

...of his own infant son...

"WHAT THE HECK, MAN!?" screamed the voice of Sokka.

The Saiyan was jerked back to reality; he whipped his head to the left to see the teen.

"What's wrong with you!? We were about to have _him_ AND your clothes back!" Sokka plainly explained.

"Huh?" the prince tunred back in front of him, seeing the two girls leaving, taking his suit with them.

"No! My armor!" Vegeta cried, shoving the baby into Sokka's chest, but not too hard as to hurt the child. He made a mad dash for the girls.

Azula pausd in her walking, her lipstick-coverd lips once again curled into a smirk as she heard footsteps rushing toward her.

"Come and get it..." she mumbled before wheeling around and shooting a **blue** stream of fire out from her fingertips; the Saiyan countered the incoming projectile with a recharged ki ball; the two missles collided, creating a haze of smoke, which Vegeta dramaticly lept out of, cocking his fist as he plunged for the firebender. The princess side-stepped just before his fist made a hole through the reinforced wood. Thr girl bobbed out of the way of Vegeta's other fist. and countered with a flaming claw, which Vegeta parried with his previous hand and seized her up by the throat, prompting her to grab the Saiyan's forearm with both hands and heated them up, forcing him to cringe in pain and drop her; the moment he let go, the princess kicked him in the stomach with both legs, the prince stumbling a few feet back. Before the Saiyan could charge her again, he blocked a flying kick from the pink-clad girl, the two engaing in a brief exchange of blows before backflipping apart from eachother.

"Man, this is gettin' good..." Bumi remarked.

"Interesting," Azula began cooly, feeling her bruised neck,"you're not as much a novice as those guards painted you to be; I'll be sure to punish them for their underestimation. I still, however, doubt you'll be able to take down Ty Lee so easily..."

"Is that a fact?" Vegeta smirked, charging a ki ball in each hand and hurling them at Ty Lee, who nimbly bent to avoid both light-balls, though there were more where those came from...

The children witnessed the spectacle with suprisingly placid expressions, as if they were merely watching ice-skating, of course Katara's was more provocative.

"Ssso, he seems like he's in trouble; shouldn't we, ya know, be helping him...somehow?" Sokka wondered...

"I guess...We could call Appa...or something..." Aang considered.

"Yeah, that's right, bend over and tighten those buns..." Katara fantasized.

"I'm going to ignore that..." Sokka tolerated.

"Grr! Stop dodging!" the Saiyan growled, throwing ball after ball of ki at the gymnist, who leaned and weaved and evaded each one.

"Stop dodging!" the prince yelled, increasing his rate of ki throwing into a full-fledge energy ball volley; though the girl flipped and twirled in mid-air, not a single ball so mush as grazing her clothes.

"STOP DOOOODGIIIIIIIING!" Vegeta roared, gathering up a large ki orb between both hands, and launched at the girl. Petrafied, the acrobat swung her leg upward, actually kicking the orb far above her; it exploded against the chain suspending the old king; Bumi plummeted down into a stone shoot, sliding down the path. The prince stood there stupafied, before the girl somersaulted behind him and threw a series of precise jabbs all over his back and joints, the Saiyan tripping onto the wooden floor.

The Avatar saw this."Welp', that's ma _cue_!" he announced as he opened his staff into an orange glider; he tossed the bison signal to Sokka."Here, you call Appa while do something brash and naive that will inevitibly reveal my indentity as the Avatar!"

The princess perked up."The Ava-who-now?"

The nomad winced."I said out loud, didn't I?" he noticed before taking off for his friend, the princess rushing after him.

"Well, at least you didn't dodge that one..." the warrior lamented, flat on his bare back; Vegeta then made to push himself back up with a his arms, but, mysteriously, he could not do that; in fact, the Saiyan soon found out all of his limbs weren't working, remaining unresponsive no matter how hard he willed them to move."Wha? What's going on!?"

The gymnist flipped on top of him, her knees on his abdomen."I blocked your chi! You won't be able to use it for a while..." she explained happily.

"You WHAT!?" the prince shrieked."Do have ANY idea how long it took me to regain my energy!?"

The acrobat cocked her head to her left."Aw, you seem upset; I know how to cheer you up...!" she announced, wiggling her dexterous fingers; she then preceded to gently but rapidly graze har fingers against vegeta's exposed sides.

Vegeta was confused; though, for some unknown reason, a smile unaturaly crept along his face."Wha? W-wait a minute, what're you doing-wha-we-u-erheh-heh what-hehheheheh-stop-heh-stop it!- heh HaHaHaHa! Cut that out-HAHAHAHAHA! STOP!-AHAHAHHAHAHA!-I'LL KILL YOU! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I'LL SLAUGHTER YOUR WHOLE FAMILY! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Katara's smile vanished."Hey! Get your hands off him!" she announce, whipping out a water tendril from her pouch and launching at the gymnist. The tendrill wrapped around the acrobat's neck, and catapulted her far over the waterbender, soaring clean off the platform - an act that, were it not TV-Y7, would most likely have killed her, if not rendered her comatose and confined to the miserable, ironic life of spending the remainder of your days as a living vegetable

Katara huffed."Okay, I'll take Mai and Tom Tom while you get Vegeta," she ordered, taking the infant in her arm while lifting the goth with her water tentacle.

The Saiyan grunted and heaved all he could, his body was almost as useless as Raditz. He managed at best to turn his head to the right, and that's when he saw it: his armor, lying on the ground within arm's length of his body; if only he could _move_ his arm!. _"No, I will not stand for this!"_ Closing out all awareness of his surroundings, the prince diverted all voluntary and involuntary brain power to the sole task of schooching his right arm outward. _"Yes! I can feel it! My arm is sliding against the wood! And my left arm as well!...And, my legs...and...my back...?"_ Vegeta finally opened one eye to check his progress as well as this strange sensation; all he saw was his armor gradually moving faurther away from him; wait, no, no the armor was just lying there, it was _he_ who was moving - dragged in fact, by none other than Sokka.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" the Saiyan cried out to the teen as he hauled him away, as if Sokka were committing some act of insanity.

The bony young man grunted."Relax! I'm taking you to Appa; there's no reason to stay hear."

"But, my armor! NO! TURN AROUND, DAMN YOU! I'M NOT LEAVING MY ARMOR BEHIND!" Vegeta roared, in a fit of wrath and angst, mentally thrashing around in desperation.

"There's no time!" Sokka reasoned, him and his sister tugging his limp body onto the bison's saddle, a squad of firebenders forcing the beast to take off as soon as the three were mounted

"NNOOOOOOO! MY PREECIIIIOOOOUUUS!" the prince whaled futily as his beloved suit faded out of sight...

* * *

Vegeta lied there, still paralyzed and undressed, with the rest of the children - including the Avatar - as the bison sailed away from the grand city, the prince wearing the most malice-drenched expression yet...

"Don't be upset, Vegeta," the bald child began, guiding Appa,"I sorry we couldn't get your space-suit back; but look on the bright-side, at least you have your health. And who says you need special clothes to define who you are?" he recited with a sweet smile.

The warriors glare ceased to waver."The moment I can move my limbs, you'll be the first to die."

"Can I be the second?" the currently tied up Mai threw in."I think I'm gonna be stuck with these guys for a while..." she said, well aware she was preaching to the space-choir.

"Aang's right, Vegeta..." with the waterbender agreed sofly, tightly hugging the Saiyan's bare arm,"we like you just the way you are..." she cooed, rubbing her cheek against his burly shoulder.

Vegeta closed his eyelids shut."...please stop touching me..." he said even softer.

Sokka shook his head."Man, you really had us there: I thought you were gonna do it..." he lamented, cradling the infant."Guess you're not as cold-blooded as we thought..." the teen added with a little sarcasm.

The Saiyan turned his glare over to Sokka, but it inevitibly sunk down to the child in his arms, still playing with his bone boomerang; his sharp stare dulled."Yes, well...just wanted my armor back..."

"It's just terrible we couldn't get through the deal smoothly; I never wanted this to happen..." the Avatar continued glumly.

"What do you expect, boy? It's war; count it grace that you're still alive..." Vegeta replied, still with definite edge.

"I dunno, kidnapping? That's just not my thing."

Vegeta turned back to the child, now trying to catch that white monkey thing by its tail; as he crawled about, he stopped to look up at the crippled Saiyan with pure eyes...

The princes pupils trembled; he shut them tight."Doh fine, we'll give the baby back, but the girl stays!" he concluded.

"That's alright; I was only thinking about the baby anyway..."The Avatar replied.

"Shouldn't of expected otherwise..." Mai cracked.

The airbender's head arose, apparently recalling something."Hey, Vegeta, I just remembered! Before I left Bumi, he wanted me to tell you about the eight-sixth jin..."

The prince's eyelids reopened, at their own peril "Eighty-sixth jin? What eighty-sixth jin?"

Aang turned his head halfway toward the warrior, his eyebrow cocked as a sly smirk grew between his cheeks."Saiya-jin."

The bison's flight into the horizon was complemented by a enraged scream that resonated across the plains.


	4. Swamp People

A crimson pontiac thundered down the street, three other muscle cars hot on its trial.

Iroh, wearing a brown overcoat and a black undershirt peered out the window."Faster, Zuko! They're gaining on us!"

Zuko, his head adorned with an oversized afro and donned in a white unbuttoned shirt and a purple undershirt, gritted his teeth as he clenched the leather steering wheel."Man, whatchoo think I'm tryina do!?"

The persuing muscle car in front rolled down its passenger window, revealing a man wearing a ski mask who pulled out a .45 pastol and began firing.

"Aw, hell-naw! Suckas' ain't scuffin' up _dis_ ride!" Zuko cried furiously, spinning the steering wheel left and right rapidly, forcing the car to swerve through downtown traffic to evade their attackers.

Coming up onto a threeway intersection, Zuko jerked the wheel to the right as hard as he could, the car violently screeching aside, bashing clean through a random cabbage cart as its owner dove out of the way.

"Sweet easta'..." the merchant marvelled as he sat their on the pavement.

The enemy car attampted the same stunt, but he wasn't fast enough, resulting the rear car slamming into its side both of them crashing through a jewelry store.

The third musclecar was still on their track; the upper window flipped open as another masked thug arose from the opening, aiming his AK-47 at the target and unleashing a round of bullets.

"Take da wheel, Mushi; dis fool be askin for it..." Zuko commanded as he opened the driver door.

"I hope you know what you're doing, Nephew..." Iroh replied with concern, worming into the driver's seat.

Zuko climbed up on the top of his ride, standing upright and facing the gunmen; he lepted in the air with his left foot extended, allowing the man's nose to smack against the heel of Zuko's boot.

Zuko rolled onto the ground smoothly; the driver jerked the car around as a desperate attempt to runover the teen.

"Benda please," the scarred bounty hunter scoffed, whipping out his signature magnum pistol and fired a sure shot that nailed the man square in the head; the car swerved past Zuko and crashed into an ice cream truck: no one was hurt, except the ice cream truck.

Zuko shook his head."Brothas ain't knowin who deyz messin with; _m_ , Agni ha mercy..."

* * *

Zuko shot up from his sleeping bag, shaking his head rapidly. This in turn awoke his uncle Iroh, whom stared at him with concerned.

"You had that dream again, didn't you, Zuko? Iroh asked.

"Yes, Uncle, I had it again; this time you were there," the prince of the Fire Nation responded while rubbing his temples.

"Well, I am sorry, Zuko; it is likely a sign of deep anxiety." The other prince of the Fire Nation speculated.

"Likely? _Likely!?_ " he spun to his uncle. "We've wandering the Earth Kingdom for a month just trying not to get caught or killed by _anyone_ who recognizes us, all because my _own_ father what's us in chains! I can't believe this is my life!" he shouted as he plopped back to the ground.

"Well, Zuko," Iroh began,"look on the bright side-"

"Literally everyone on the planet wants. to. kill. us..." Zuko hissed.

Iroh shrugged."Well...they haven't yet..."

"And when they do?" Zuko grilled.

"Just pray it is an earthbender that will quickly and painlessly crush us with a giant boulder." Iroh responded."Or we get blown up. What more of a spectacular death could we ask for than to explode in an enormous ball of fire!" He beamed.

"That's easy for you to say, old man!" Zuko shouted."At least you've lived a nice long life with some semblance of honor; I'll have none of that. Someone else will capture the Avatar, my sister will take the throne, and nobody will remember me..." he vocalized in brutal detail.

"Which, my I remind you, Zuko, all depends upon whether or not someone will kill us. Do not give into despair, Zuko; only then will you truly lose all hope." Iroh comforted.

"Well be sure to help me find what hope I have left to lose..." Zuko curled back into his bag."I can be sure of one thing, Uncle: _no one_ else in the entire world is having it worse than me..."

* * *

"I want to die...I want to die so very very badly..." Vegeta mumbled, curled up in a sleeping bag.

Moving on to the plot, we transition to see Appa gliding casually over a broad swamp-based landscape.

"Okay, here's what I'm thinking..." The Avatar began,"We back go to the Northern Air Temple where Teo's dad helps build a new spaceship; then we travel to that planet with all the flying people; and _then_ we bring back all sorts of technology and revolutionary agricultural techniques, and bring them before the Fire Lord; and he's so amazed that he decides to end the hundred-year War in order to establish a coalition between the two worlds," he explained.

Vegeta rolled his eyes."Child, if you honestly expect a more advanced race to come down and solve all your problems, you obviously haven't the slightest idea how colonization works," he dismissed.

Still recovering from the tragic loss of his Saiyan armor, the prince was forced to make a substitute: he decided to try on the clothing Sokka wore during the previous winter season (much to Sokka's disdain), clad in a dark blue tribal garment that enveloped his entire body (much to Katara's disappointment), as well as a pair of old but sturdy boots and beige torso armor that he "borrowed" from one of the Earth Kingdom rebels (no seriously, he asked permission and they lend it to him). He had long strips of white cloth tightly wrapped around his forearms, which aslo covered his palms and the back of his hands, making the strenuous compromise of leaving his fingers exposed (you know, like Rock Lee?). In stark contrast, their sunlight draining hostage, Mai, upon Vegeta discovering the multitude of blades and darts hidden beneath her baggy clothing, was prompted to strip the girl down to a pair of brown raggish under garments (which Sokka took little issue with). But, parentheses aside...

"Still can you imagine how wonderful that would be?" the waterbender dreamed,"to actually go out there; out through the stars, exploring other planets and life and ethnicity...the passionate, undisturbed love we could mak-I mean, um, Bagels! Yes, heh, think of all the lovely bagels we could make! Yes, bagels is what I meant, heh heh... _mmmm, bagels..._ " she breathed, resting her chin in her palm thoughtfully.

Indeed, the Saiyan was becoming weary of these children's on-going fantasies about space traveling, much less the waterbender's prevailing obsession towards the Saiyan's body; and on a rather ironic note, the stubborn unbelief of the novice warroir wasn't growing in him either. not like building a ship was even an option; Vegeta doubted this world's top brains could even comprehend a lightbulb, nevermind a space pod...

"But only after we stop by the planet where you reestablish your _grip on reality_!" Sokka squawked in a fit of frustration.

"And a twenty thousand pound buffalo that can fly just by flapping its tail is realistic?" queried the indecently dressed goth.

"Hey, I never said it was _this_ planet..." the boy remarked.

And, if such a possibility a ship already was in the process of assembly, there certainly was zero chance of anyone accompanying him, let alone allow said craft to be big enough for more than one person. Vegeta gazed up beyond the clouds: how wonderful was the thought, soaring through the atmosphere, sailing back into the cosmos, escaping the insanity of this rock at last; perhaps his power would rush back to him at the very instant, and then he'd just blow up this cursed planet. No, no he would just leave, let these children continue their shamble of a resistance, only to run broken and destroyed by their inevitable failure, and pay for their attempts to vanquish the Prince.

Alas, all this now appeared as likely as Kakarot coming back from the dead and earning a Ph. D. in quantum physics; his hopes of ever making it off this world were now more crushed than ever before...

It was at that moment that the turbulent winds that accompanied flight were starting subside; the Saiyan leaned over the edge of the saddle; using the horizon as a measurement, he not only deduced that the bison was slowing down, but also descending closer to the swamp.

Vegeta turned to the Avatar, who was peering down into the swamp mindlessly.

"Hey! Airbender! Mind the reigns!"

The bald child snapped out of his transe."Huh? Mind who's reigns?" he turned to Vegeta.

"Care to explain why we're loosing altitude?" the Saiyan demanded.

The Avatar blinked."What? I didn't even notice..." he admitted.

"Are you noticing now?" Vegeta gestured outward, Sokka much distracted by Mai to make the comment himself.

Aang returned his attention to the swamp." I know this is gonna sound weird, but...I think the swamp is...calling to me..." he tried to explain.

"Is it telling you to give me my clothes back?" the goth asked.

The Saiyan snorted."Good luck with _that_ road, sister..."

"No, I...I think it wants us to land there..." Aang lipped, as if he didn't believe what he was saying.

Frankly, neither did Vegeta."And perhaps _I_ want to annihilate the planet; we all have to compromise at some point..." he retorted.

"I don't know..." Aang struggled,"Bumi said to learn earthbending I would have to wait and listen; and now I'm actually _hearing_ the earth..." he then smiled giddily to himself,"I also can't get that 'eighty-sixth jin-' joke outta my head..."

Vegeta rolled his eyes: he was still trying to."Look, boy, do you think you can resist your mud fetish long enough to managed your animal? I already have enough sensual tension radiating from your two friends, now pull back up and focus!" he commanded the boy.

The Avatar's smiled vanished."Okay, I guess since you feel so strongly about this...bye, swamp..." he whipped Appa's reins,"Yip-Yip!" he cried, compelling the beast to reascend and pick up some speed.

Vegeta glared."And would you kindly seize with the tornado? You're not making me feel guilty..."

"Tornado?" Sokka questioned; he then suddenly heard a loud swirling noise behind him; he turned to the opposite direction to see the source of the sound: an enormous spiraling behemoth, barreling straight for the bison at a terrifying speed, shredding up the swamp forestry as it went.

Sokka blinked."Oh, that tornado..." he said in a perfectly calm and casual tone; he then turned back around and returned to his sitting position as if he saw nothing, sitting there quietly...

...

...

...

...His expression perked up." **TORNADO!?"** he shrieked, right before they were all devoured by the spinning giant. The monstrous winds immediately tore the five from the bison, sending them all screaming ( except Mai, who had her arms crossed) down into the swamp, kicking up dust clouds respectively.

* * *

Vegeta's head sprang out of the murky surface, inhaling loudly; the Saiyan arose to his feet out from the shallow water, surveying the environment. The Saiyan wiped off most of the mud from his makeshift armor, noting that, despite the violent ordeal, he bore no injury whatsoever. Naturally, this knowledge made him smirk.

"Hah! Is that all you go-!" right before being flattened under Appa's grand blubber, the ten ton bison having slammed right on top of him, the lemur quietly perching atop his horn.

A muffled grunt of agony muttered beneath the animal's belly.

* * *

Following the next three and a half hours, Vegeta was riding the Avatar's bison, Dappa (or was it Kappa? it definitely had an 'appa' in it; at this point, he might as well be calling him _Nappa..._ ) across the dirty river, doing his best to navigate out of the disgusting swamp; the warrior attempted utilizing the animal's flying ability to escape immediately, but he was soon prevented by the countless layers of vegetation (that did sound an awful lot like his name, didn't it? Stupid old man...) . At the tenth try, he ended up tangleing the whole bison in a multitude of vines, so much that they actually supported the beast's weight, leaving them suspended in the air. Vegeta was forced to use his ki to cut the vines, successfully freeing the beast, but not before the creature's orientation was somehow altered so that the bison was dropped back-first and that Vegeta ended up under the bison's back in mid-fall, resulting in the monster falling ontop of him a second time; Vegeta soon decided to simply follow the river and not think about flying, though the utter stench of this deplorable biosphere alone was enough to tempt an eleventh try...

It wasn't necessarily his surroundings that unnerved the Saiyan - he'd been through even more repulsive environments; only in those cases, Vegeta still enjoyed the privilege of an advanced, element resistant space suit that shielded him from all the dirt, slime, and blood that tended to splash all over him, instead of his makeshift homage to that suit that actually absorbed every particle of filth it came into contact with and saturating his skin with mud and gunk and everything else under the sink (that is, besides all the cleaning chemicals...); on a side note, the prince was only in environments such as these long enough to wipe them from the face of the globe: another blessed luxury stolen from him, the perpetrators most likely being the Avatar and his tribal friends, who probably were coordinating all the events that have transpired so far, right down to Vegeta being trapped in this swamp without his armor; at this point, the only factor left to determine was what he will have for breakfast the morning after he carves the boy's spleen out with a moldy ice-cream scoop.

On the other hand, the prince didn't actually plan on searching for said conspirators, opting to abandon them and find his way out of this distasteful climate - Vegeta couldn't help but smile the image of those inept children lost in the midst of the swamp, gradually slipping into madness and killing eachother out of paranoia, perhaps kidnapped by some group of savages and sacrificed to their heathen gods, or even contracting some agonizingly fatal swamp disease or toxin; the scavengers would slowly consume their lifeless bodies, and soon there would be nothing left of them but another unpleasant memory, fading away into mere lore and myth, thus ridding the universe of one more minuscule piece of refuse, as if they never even existed to begin with...

Of course, Vegeta would have to get out of this swamp first if he were to fully entertain such a precious thought. Honestly, the Saiyan saw no need to complain at this point, now retaining an adequate substitute of transportation (the bison), a faithful companion/meal(the lemur), as well as he ki steadily returning (although it seemed a fair estimate that his powers probably would be recovering sooner were it not for that accursed gymnast and her chi blocking technique; he will one day uncover the mechanics behind that deadly but mysterious technique known as "tickling" as well...) And, as a bonus, it felt as though that gargantuan kidney stone was on the verge of passing.

Indeed, things were actually starting to revolve towards the Saiyan's favor; it seemed like smooth sailing from here on, just as long as the prince didn't run in to any-

"Hey, Tho! Look over yonder!" called a shril voice.

"Well, I'll be...!" answered a gritty voice.

Vegeta mentally slapped his forehead. _"...natives..."_

The Saiyan realized he had his eyes closed for the duration of the thought; when opened them, he saw a small river canoe drifting towards him, piloted by two greasy, half-naked (or perhaps even less than that...) men wearing large leaves on their hats; one was rather short, awfully fat, had five o'clock shadow and swollen lower lip; the other was significantly taller, with a mop of messy hair and disturbingly long armpit fuzz.

"Aw, rabbitdog-gawnit, Tho, I was hopin' we'd find a meal on this here trail..." the skinny one moped.

"Yeah, I was hopin' so too, Due; looks like this here spiky-haired fellla' beat us to em'..." the fat one lamented. The two had an annoyingly distinct Southern accent, not unlike that of the inhabitants of Space-Mississippi.

"Oh well, at least we got ourselves a visitor!" the skinny one identified as "Doo" beamed regardless,"We don't get alotta those out here..."

" I simply cannot imagine why..." Vegeta remarked snidely, looking in another direction.

The bony swampmen shrugged."Well, it's probly' on account o' bein' a perilous wilderness full o' ferocious predators, disease-ridden insects, cannibals, an' more poisonous plants then there're hairs on the back o' every baboon mammoth on the face o' the earth; also, there's a gigantic plant demon that lives at the center of the swamp..." he rubbed his chin,"But aside o' that, I can't think o' nuthin' else..."

The shorter, stalkier swampmen rolle his eyes."Dagblasted, Due, he said that on purpose! Ain'tchya ever heard of a 'ironic statement'?" he reproached the taller male.

It then clearly just dawned on the skinny native."Oh, I gets it! Heh, you're perty funny there!" he chuckled."So, what brings a guy like you all the way ta' good ol' Foggy Swamp?"

"Would you believe a homicidal tornado?" Vegeta tried.

The fat one raised an eyebrow."A tornado that kills other tornadoes? Sounds perty crazy..."

The Saiyan snorted - compared to these last few days, it was actually very reasonable..."Indeed. Well, it was nice meeting you kind locals, but I really need to be leaving; would you mind to give the fastest route out of the swamp?" the prince asked as politely as possible.

"Well that there's an easy one!" 'Doo' smiled,"All ya gotsta' do is get as far away from the tree as ye can, an' ya'll o' be outta here in no time," he explained.

"Ah, I see..." Vegeta nodded...

...

...

...

...Vegeta looked around a little, then looked back to the two."I sorry, which tree was that?"

The two swamp natives blinked.

"...The tree..." the skinny man lipped.

"Yes, yes, I know, but which tree?"

The fat one arched another eyebrow."Whadya' mean 'which tree'?"

"I mean which tree in particular do I avoid?" Vegeta explained.

"I just told ya' which tree..." Du responded confusedly.

Vegeta's eyes narrowed."No you didn't, you just said to avoid a tree," he reminded.

"Not _a_ tree: _the_ tree," Du replied.

Vegeta rolled his eyes."I know, but _which_ tree exactly!?"

"Well, I think it's kinda' obvious which tree..." the fat one retorted.

Vegeta was getting annoyed."No it isn't - incase you haven't noticed, we're _surrounded_ by trees," he said, trying to keep his cool.

The skinny one gained a quizzical expression."Wh-?-No we ain't! There's only one tree in this whole swamp!" he replied.

At this statement, time almost froze; both Vegeta and Momo stared awkwardly at the two natives; they exchanged bewildered glances at eachother, then looked back at the two...

The Saiyan twitched quite visibly...

"What's that over there?" Vegeta inquired as calmly as possible, pointing to a tree.

The fat one followed his finger."Well I reckon that there's a branch."

"And what is that branch connected to?" Vegeta asked.

"The tree..." answered the skinny one matter-of-factly.

" _This_ tree?" Vegeta queried for clarity.

"What tree?" asked the fat one.

"da one I'm _pointing to..._ " Vegeta replied through gritted teeth.

"Well that ain't no tree; that there's a branch," explained the skinny one.

"YES! And it is connected to THIS TREE that I am pointing to, RIGHT!? Just like all of the _other_ branches that are connected to all the _other_ trees that we are SURROUNDED BY!" Vegeta cried. He took a deep breath..."...So I asked you two a _ **gain**_ : **which one of these trees** am I **supposed to avoid...?** "

The two fishermen stared at the Saiyan as if they knew he was an alien; they exchanged glances...

The fat one glared at the prince."Dang, man, if you can't understand directions _that_ simple, then you're just about as dumb as you look." Tho concluded honestly.

Vegeta's kidney stone passed.

* * *

"There it is again," Toph complained as she sat at the tea table.

"There's what again, honey?" Poppy inquired as she sipped her drink.

"That screaming: for the past few days, I keep hearing some guy screaming at the top of his lungs somewhere out in the distance; it's like somebody's being tortured relentlessly or something," the blind girl explained.

"I don't hear anything..." Lao said indifferently.

"Well _I_ do, and it's getting on my nerves," Toph continued.

"Well that simply doesn't make sense," Toph's mother questioned,"How is it that you can hear something that we can't? It's not as if you have some special sixth sense that amplifies your hearing; and if you did, we'd certainly know of it..."

"Your mother's right, Toph," Lao agreed stoically,"We're you parents, we know everything about you; now drink your tea and forget this nonsense," he finalized, taking another sip of Jasmine.

The third-time champion of the Earth Rumbler Tournament crossed her arms. _"I will find the source of that screaming; and when I do, somebody's gonna get buried..."_ she thought to herself, her blind eyes narrowed with determination.

* * *

The two natives unclenched their ears, staring at the warrior with bewilderment.

"Wuuuwee! That was louder than loudest screamin' owl I ever done heard!" Du marveled.

A white aura ignited around the Saiyan. **"AND IT'S THE LAST THING YOU INFERNAL REDNECKS WILL** _ **EVER**_ **...!** " Though before the space-man could say "hear", a stange slimy sound gurgled behind him, along with a large shadow gradually eclipsing him and even the bison.

Realizing this, Vegeta wheeled around to blast anything that dared interrupt his speech, until he saw something that made his aura dissapate: a gigantic beast composed purely out of swamp vines, with only a small featureless wooden face to denote its head.

"Ooooh, you done did it now," Du announced,"Done gone and woke up the swamp demon..."

"Come on, Du, let's get outta here an' leave Hyu t'his bidness'!" Tho cried.

Way ahaead' o' ya, Tho!" Du agreed. With that, the natives turned around and used water bending to jet off the opposite direction.

The Saiyan was now left alone with the monster that dwarfed even the bison. The creature drooped its wooden head down toward him.

Vegeta was frozen-It was not in an elite Saiyan's nature to flee from danger, and yet...

* * *

"YIP YIP, NAPPA!" Vegeta commanded the bison, urging it to increase its speed as the humongous plant monster continued down the river after them.

Things were getting worse by the nanosecond; how was _he_ to know that the creature was sensitive to loud noises!?

As the chase went on, Vegeta tried fending off the monster with a rapid dispersal of ki balls, but the demon absorbed the shots with its own plant body; random vines from every direction sprung out through the trees, trying to snatch the Saiyan clean off the bison; these only added to the targets of the prince's ki volley.

That tore it: there was no longer a doubt in Vegeta's mind that rotten bald child had it out for him - why else would he have started to descend into the swamp unless to drop Vegeta down here into the predicament which he was currently in? And what about that awfully convenient homicidal tornado (or wouldn't it have been _hetero_ cidal? Gah with the prefixes...!)? How ludicrous it was for anyone to think the great and wise Avatar had no knowledge of this beast's existence? The prince had been _Gollum_ 'd from the start!

About twenty feet into the bison's path, a horde of vines shot up from the river surface, prompting the Saiyan to yank the reigns with all his depowered might, which in turn prompted the bison to rear its bulk in the air at a fourty-degree angle.

Vegeta realized that wasn't as smooth as it seemed, as now the bison was about to fly into a wall of leaves and other forestry. As (N)appa tore through the flora, Vegeta was smacked in the face by multiple branches, fruit, squirrels, and so many leaves as to blind his view entirely. By the time the bison blew out the shrubbery, Vegeta had to wipe the leaves off his face to see again. He noticed that a pair of half coconuts were stuck to his chest like a bra, his waist was lined with leaves like a skirt, and some of the juice from the splattered fruit was crudely smeared over his face like lipstick. There was also a small pudgy white bird perched on his right shoulder; Vegeta stared at the bird for a second or two before the bird let out an _ear-piercing_ shriek right into his ear, causing the Saiyan to yell and wildly flail his arms all over the place until all his "make-over" slipped off of him. "IS THERE NO END TO THIS INSANITY!?"

As if to respond, a huge arm composed of vines swung at his head form the left that Vegeta just barely ducked under - the swamp demon was still perusing him.

"Alright, you asked for it, swamp-hole...!" the prince announced, steadily arising to his feet on (N)appa's back in the center of the saddle; he then raised a hand to the monster and shouted,"BIG BANG ATTACK!"...

...

...Again, nothing happened.

Vegeta stared at his fingers with even more bewilderment than three days ago."What!? Oh come on, I can do all the basic ki attacks, why not the advanced ones!?" he demanded to the heavens. The Saiyan then had an epiphany...

Vegeta then raised his hand once again toward the beast once again, this time shouting,"LITTLE BANG ATTACK!" Upon doing so, an intensely powerful ball of energy burst out of the Saiyan's hand, slamming into the monster's face with a big explosion that consumed it.

After briefly averting his eyes from the explosion, the prince laughed in triumph...which soon deflated as the creature lurched out of the smoke and resumed its persuit of the Saiyan, the attack having little more than slowed it down.

Vegeta let his arms dangle in disbelief: just how was he supposed to stop this relentless abomination!? All the prince could do was hope that this bison could eventually outlast-

...wwwwwwaitaminute...

That was it: in all the commotion, it somehow eluded Vegeta that the animal he was currently seated upon was not only a twenty thousand pound bison, but a twenty thousand pound _flying_ bison who's skull is undoubtedly as thick as solid steel; of course the bison clearly wasn't as large as the monster, but surely the mass of the bison combined with its current momentum would be more than enough to incapacitate this vile creature.

Yeah, yeah that's what he'll do: he'll just gather a little distance between them, yank this hairy sucker into a u-turn and _wham!_ We'll see who's running from who...

Of course, this semmingly intuitive thought was interrupted by the schreeching lemur as it rapidly tugging at Vegeta's (Sokka's) shirt, as if it was desperately wanting the Saiyan to look out behind him; this tugging naturally irritated the prince." _Grrr_ , What is it, you stupid bat-thing!? Can't you see I'm in the middle..." he started as he turned around...only to see a huge log far too thick to go over or around, especially at the the bison's present velocity.

"...oh..."

The bison slammed into the log with so much force as to cause the rest of the animal's body to fling upward, catapulting Vegeta straight through the trees and unnaturally soaring through the sky.

* * *

As Aang trekked through the woods, a blur of Vegeta could be seen passing overhead. Aang stopped at the sound of the feint scream, and looked in multiple directions, but saw no one.

* * *

A spiky-haired blue blur splashed into a shallow pond of muddy water, causing the area to be re-enveloped beneath an explosion of swamp goop.

Sonic the Hedgehog dizzily emerged from the pond covered in mud."Aw, man, I just got out of a swamp..." he grimaced.

Vegeta groggily arose from the surface next to him, feeling his head; the Saiyan paused, and swung his head toward Sonic, staring at him in bewilderment."YOU AGAIN!?" he bellowed.

The hedgehog balked in fear."Uh-oh! Wrong universe!" he cried, vanishing in a greenish light before Vegeta could tackle him, causing the prince to once again fall into the mud.

Vegeta again sprung out of the mud, whipping his head in every direction; seeing that he was alone.

The Saiyan mildly cursed on the inside: he thought he had obliterated that damn transforming hedgehog in a battle to the death years ago, though he did recall the rodent at first being black with red stripes and different shoes; gah well, probably just the stress getting to him...

Especially considering just how much Vegeta had to be stressed about - now he was stranded in the middle of a swamp with no transportation, sense of direction, _or_ dinner; along with his(Sokka's) clothes so torn up and filthy he might as well continue his journey in his underwear (which, honestly would've provided the most protection eitherway...)

 _"No matter,"_ thought the Saiyan, _"I've persevered the wilderness without Nappa before, and I'll do it again..."_ Of course he was once again forced to remind himself that during those particular missions he had the power to destroy said wilderness on hand at all times, but those wildernesses were all home to creatures infinitely more terrible than the wildlife here, so the scenario was the same proportionally; right now he had to get a layout of his surroundings.

Vegeta waded out of the pond onto a reasonably dry patch of land, walking up to a green tree trunk that looked as if it reached up beyond the vines. It was no puzzle - all he needed to do was...well...do that thing that flightless animals did to reach higher elevations; what was it called? Clumbing? Cloombing? It just then occured to the Saiyan that he had never performed an action even remotely similar to this, as he had always been able to simply fly over any vertical obstacle, and he meant always.

As a boy, he would listen accounts of doctors and nurses of a new-born Saiyan infant firing out of his mother's-

Vegeta shook the memory away, there was no time for nostalgia; right now, the prince had to figure out how the mechanics of this actions: Vegeta likened it to crawling upon the ground, pulling one's body forward with his arms and push with legs; it sounded simple enough, until the Saiyan realized had never crawled before either...

He smacked his forehead, frustrated by his dependence of ki-fueled self-propulsion. Never the less, carried out his strategy. He walked up to the tree, and halfheartedly pressed both his hand against the trunk, and tried to haul himself upward by sliding his hands down against the tree, only succeeding in scraping them against the rough bark, immediately yelping in brief pain and jerking his hands away, tentatively rubbing his sensitive palms. Vegeta had forgotten the tragic loss of his armor (especially his gloves) during the battle in Omashu; he clenched his fists, _"That princess will pay for exposing my Elite fingertips to this filth!"_

Clearly, sliding them against the bark was not sufficient traction to lift him up the tree; perhaps if the Saiyan were to _grab_ the tree, he would have the necessary traction needed. Vegeta latched is fingers around one side of the tree and the other set of fingers around the other side, and pulled hard; this only resulted Vegeta slamming his face against the bark and toppling over to the ground, clutching his nose.

Vegeta angrily shot back up to his feet and punched the defiant cedar, forcing the warrior to balk away and clench his damaged knuckles, grunting all manner of alien profanity to himself. The mighty Prince of Saiyans was being bested by a tree! The prince took a deep breath and wrapped his arms around the giant plant, safely pushing his chest against the bark; with a decent amount of strength, he held his upper half in place as he slowly lifted his legs and dug his heel into the tree, successfully suspending his body off the ground.

Vegeta laughed in victory, until he realized that was merely the first step; and the he could only think to himself: What does he do next?

He supposed he could just repeat the pattern over and over until he reached the top. The Saiyan carefully and nervously inched his left arm upwards, then his right arm, then he lifted his left leg and placed his heel in a higher spot, and then repositioned his right heel to a slightly greater elevation. Vegeta let out a breath of relief - he was making progress with this cloombing thing already, all he needed to do now was continue up the tree...

* * *

It was along and grooling journey; the tree seemed to go on forever. Vegeta aggressively latched one hand after the other onto the pillar of wood, releasing a brutish grunt with each hand, beads of manly sweat dripping from his growling face, jerking his body ever higher and higher; when the Saiyan felt exhausted by the long ascension, he decided to remain at his current altitude and to recuperate. He looked down to check his progress...

...he was only six feet off the ground...

"WHAT!? YOU GOTTA BE JOKING!" Vegeta whaled; he then lost his grip and fell right back to where he started. The prince angrily pounded the ground, splashing mud everywhere including on himself. The tired Saiyan groaned as he arose, kicking and thrashing his fists around like a spoiled child. He leaned against the tree trunk in anxiety; as he looked down, he saw something rather strange: this tree had no roots at its base, which perplexed the Saiyan, as every tree he had ever seen/obliterated quite clearly had roots to suck up water and soil; Vegeta assumed that these roots were buried beneath the swampage, until he recalled what those primitive said about there only being one tree in the whole swamp. Vegeta then speculated that said tree could be so large that its own roots extended through the swamp, and that these "trees" were in fact extensions of one great plant, perhaps even composing the swamp itself. The Saiyan realized in hindsight he could've asked those swamp hill-billies (swamp-billies?) to point to that tree so Vegeta could move on in the direction opposite. The Saiyan considered wandering around the swamp until he found the tree and gain a sense of layout of the environment...

The prince's thought was interrupted by a strange tingling sensation on his left hand, which was leaning against the tree trunk; Vegeta lifted his head to see the anomoly...

There was a little worm crawling along his index finger...

"WORM!" Vegeta shouted in fear, tearing his hand from the tree and instinctively firing a ki blast at the tree itself, causing an explosion that rattled the tree, stirring hundreds of worms out of the bark.

Vegeta watched in horror as the tree trunk was gradually covered beneath a blanket of slimy, squishy, _disgusting worms;_ the worms grew so great in number that a portion of them crawled down fom the tree and on the ground, inching towards Vegeta.

"nn-n-nn-No! NO! STAY BACK, YOU MONSTERS!" the petrified Saiyan tried to warn them, shooting three more ki balls at the murky ground, creating more explosions which prompted countless more of the small demons to emerge from the mud itself, cutting off all exits from Vegeta.

The Saiyan whipped his head all over the place: they were everywhere, coming out from every opening, encircling Vegeta in an ocean of gooey evil, gradually shrinking the space between them and their alien prey. Vegeta deperately stomped and kicked the foul creatures, even picking up mud and throwing it at them, but he stop and screamed when he saw that the latest mudball he held was also full of worms, and rapidly shook the mud off his hand, only to see the minuscule abominations emerging out of his own clothing.

"NOOOO! NOOOOOOOOO! DAAAAAAAADDYYYYYYY!" The prince shrieked rather femanenly, so driven insane by fear that he rented every article of clothing from his body down to his black underwear, blindly sprinting through the jungle.

* * *

A troop of Fire Nation soldiers slowly made their way through the swamp, led by a wealthy, self-pronounced explorer by the name of Chun Tou, who was a passionate believer in the idea that there was still some wonder left in this world, and was determined to prove it by entering an unknown place known simply as the Foggy Swamp.

Most of his nation didn't believe that any civilization could thrive, let alone survive within this harsh and deadly environment, even the very men escorting him were skeptical, but his perserverence and outwright charisma allowed him to convince the Fire Lord to grant him authority of a small army, and embark on what was sure to be one of the greatest journeys in Fire Nation history.

The pioneer's thoughts of granduer were silence upon the sight of a screaming half-naked man leaping out if the vegetation and falling on the muddy ground before the explorer and his men, rolling back and forth while yelling and contorting his body in various poses.

"It's one of the swamp cannibals!" The front-most member of the personel announced, readying his trusty sword.

"Hold on!" Chun Tou stopped him, grabbing the handle of the soldier's weapon,"Can't you see this native is under a tremendous deal of pain?" He explained. Chun Tou then turn to the screaming man, and took a good look at him; the explorer then discovered the source of his suffering: his body was covered in what appeared to be a fleet of poisonous Kaiju worms! Although Chun Tou could only assume they were indeed Kaiju worms, given that he had little knowledge of the swamp's wildlife - they could just easily've been nonpoisonous worms that merely resembled the deadly Fire Nation worm. Still, Chun Tou's judgment has never failed him before, and this savage would not be behaving so radicly if he didn't believe his life was not in danger. The ambitous andventurer could only assume the worst...

"Kaiju worms! The only way to get them off him is to burn them off!" Chun Tou announced to his army; he then turned and shot a blast of fire that hopefully was small enough not to injure the native further.

Unfortunately, the savage saw the fire and instinctively rolled out of its way.

"Hold still, man! This is only way to remove those parasites!" Chun Tou tried to assure the native as he continued to shoot fireballs at him. Unlike most so-called 'colonists', Chun Tou did not trust in fear or violence to take a village, for how can the riches and glory of the Fire Nation be wrought through death and oppression? Rather, Chun Tou sook to build up a village, improving the lives of the people; giving them better clothing, tools, medical care, and education; while endeavoring to make certian that the people were not too dependent on them; he believed that if the Fire Lord wanted the whole world, the world needed to want him first. And at this very moment, this poor primitive desperately needed the aid of a firebender. If only he would hold still...!

"Quick, Men! Burn these leeches off of this native before it's too late!" the heroic figure commanded his possy; he and other firebenders kept on shooting fire balls at the savage, who persisted to avoid their shots. Finally, the primitive ran away from them, still screaming.

But Chun Tou ran after him - his soul simply would not rest until this poor man was rescued!

"Wait! We're trying to help you!" the explorer tried to convince the stranger as he and his whole enterprise persued the screaming man, shooting volleys of fire balls at him.

The swamp echoed with his scream.

* * *

It was nighttime, the swamp was alive with dis-coordinate noises...

Huddled next to a campfire and shivering was the half-naked Vegeta, only he was not shivering out of want for warmth, but out of pure anger. The Saiyan could not believe he could be brought down so low by sheer bad luck. Of course the real bad luck truly started when he left Ee-arth in the first place, kind of made the prince regret having that argument with Bulm- NO! He is NOT taking that back! There was not one thing in the whole multiverse that would EVER coerce him to reverse his resolution! Not the cave, not the loss of his armor, not that crazy king, _nothing..._

If that woman wants to go ahead and turn a Saiyan prince into a damn pencil-pusher, Vegeta will have no part of it! Tch, that planet was probably better off without the Saiyan anyhow, they do have their precious _half-breed_ to look after them after all...

 _"Hmf, no use even thinking about it..."_ thought the prince, deciding to get some sleep; he had a feeling it was going to be a rough morning...

* * *

Strangely, that rough morning never came; his trek through the swamp was so far a favorably quiet one. Indeed, the Saiyan was currently aimlessly wandering around in a dense jungle wearing nothing but tight black spandex boxer shorts - which now kind of concentrated its tightness around his tender regions - but it was still a step up from the chaotic events of yesterday.

Vegeta had no intention of even trying to find the one tree (of course with his luck, he'll smack right into it); he simply resoluted to walk a straight path he made it out of the swamp, it wasn't as if it went on forever, right? Yes, just keep walking...

 **An hour later...**

Just keep walking...

 **An hour and a half later...**

 _Just_ keep walking...

 **An hour and forty-five minutes later...**

Just keep on walkin'...

 **Two hours lat-**

"Oh for the love of crabcakes, I BEEN WALKING IN THE SAME DIRECTION FOR OVER..." Vegeta counted..."SIX HOURS AND FIFTEEN MINUTES! HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO GET OUT OF A SWAMP!?"

" _Vegeta_..."

"Not now, Nappa, can't you shut up fo-" Vegeta paused,"Nappa!?" he whipped his head in the direction of the voice...

...seeing nothing...

Could he have just imagined that? of-Of course he did; Nappa was dead-

 _'_ " _Vegeta..."_

He snapped his eyes all over the place, still seing no one...

...that is, until he decided to reveal himself...

A plume of mist gathered it self before the Saiyan, accumulating into a wall of fog, out of which emerged what looked like a zombiefied Nappa.

"Vegeta...why did you kill me...?" the ghostly Nappa moaned.

Vegeta blinked in shock."Wha-What do you meen why? You were paralyzed! You would've done the same thing to me!" Vegeta defended himself..

 _"Vegeta..."_ called another famailiar voice from the fog.

Out emerged a zombiefied version of Raditz; this one had a gaping whole through his chest."Vegeta...why did you leave me to die...?" the lifeless Raditz moaned.

"Raditz!? I-! What was I supposed to do !? You were in an entirely different galaxy!" Vegeta responded.

 _"Vegeta..."_ yet a third voice called.

Out of the fog emerged his zombified father, the King of Saiyans, dried blood trickeling from his mouth. "My son...why did you forsake your entire race...?" moaned the deceased King.

The prince couldn't speak."Father!? There-yo-Frieza-...it-it's not like could've done anything to stop him! What's going on here!?" Vegeta deman-

 _"Vegeta..."_

"What, another one!?" Vegeta growled.

Out of the fog emerged a zombified Tarble."Brother...why didn't you stand up for me when I was exiled...?"

Vegeta stared at his younger brother incredulously."Are you serious!? It wasn't _my_ fault your power level was so unforgivably tiny! Besides, if you have such a problem with Father's decision, go ahead and tell him! He's standing right next to you..."

 _"Vegeta..."_

"Again with the voices!?" Vegeta grimaced.

Out emerged a zombified Turles."Vegeta...why wouldn't you elect me to your ranks...?"

Vegeta rolled his eyes."Look, I know you're pretty strong and all, but I just couldn't stand your endless chatter about mystical trees and... _hang on a second_ -Tarble, are you even dead...!?"

 _"Vegeta..."_

"Oh come on, who now!?" Vegeta yelled.

Out of the fog emerged the zombified form of Paragus."Why did you kill my son?"

"Well, excuse me for not wanting to be brutally killed! It was torture enough to share my energy with Kakarot! So what now, is your son going to ask me why I didn't let him destroy the galaxy? Look, if one more Saiyan ghost from my past pops out of nowhere, I'm going to-!"

 _"Father..."_

The echo of that voice utterly neutralized Vegeta's irritation, as out of the fog came someone he'd never thought he'd see again.

"Father..." Trunks breathed,"...why didn't you save me?"

Vegeta's mouth hung open - this was not right."Trunks? You...why...why are you here? we...revived you already...y-you should be in the future killing those damn androids!"

 _"Vegeta..."_ echoed another voice, one more startling than his dead son.

"no..." Vegeta gaped, as out of the fog slowly limped...Bulma, broken and burned; she bare managed to lift her face, her dead eyes at Vegeta.

"...why...why did you leave? I...I lo...loved you..."

Vegeta, his eyes trembling, his open lips quaking found himself dashing for the dying woman, before she collapsed into ash in his hands. He stared in horror as the very ashes in his hands faded into nothing.

 _"Vegeta..."_ came another voice that made his head snapped forward; it was Gohan.

 _"Vegeta..."_ then out came Piccolo.

 _"Vegeta..."_ then Krillin, then Yamcha, then Tien, then Chaotzu, Bumla's parents, Yajirobe, Korin, Master Roshi, 17 and 18 - everyone he met on earth came out of the fog, calling his name.

 _"What the hell is this!? None of these people are dead!"_

 _"Vegeta..."_

The people of Earth didn't stop there: out of the fog came Aang, Sokka, Katara, Mai, Ty Lee, Azula - all of the still living people on _this_ world.

The number kept growing, the voices grew louder, the gathering of ghosts of everyone he'd ever met, along with people he didn't even know, towering over him like a monolith of death, and atop that monolith emerged a shadow, a laughing figure with a voice he will never forget - the voice of the monster that killed Goku.

 _ **"Vegeta...You arrogant fool. You think you have nothing left to lose? I will take EVERYTHING FROM YOU!"**_

It hurled the fog of death at Vegeta. It swirled around him like a tornado. The countless screams forcing him to clutch his ears in mutual agony. He ran, he ran as fast as he could, no idea where but anywhere but here. But the fog did not stop, there was no end in sight, it began to consume him, taking him along with its victims. Vegeta yelled in desperation to escape the void, when suddenly...

* * *

He smacked right into Sokka, who smacked into Katara, who smacked into Aang, all four of them tumbling and splashing into a small murky pond.

"What do you guys think you're doing!?" Sokka arose angrily," I've been looking all over for you!"

Katara arose. "Well, I've been wandering around looking for you!"

"Yeah right. You were just looking for Vegeta!" Sokka presumed.

"WHAT THE GODDAMN HELL JUST HAPPENED!?" Vegeta shrieked as he exploded out of the water.

"Speak of the evil spirit, here he is..." Sokka pointed out.

The Saiyan prince wheezed hurricanes from his mouth, his bugged out eyes darting everywhere; were it not for already being wet, he'd certainly be sweating bullets."You! Boy! Girl! You're alive!"

"What happened to you?" Aang asked.

The prince's breathing slowed down. He gulped."I..have no effing idea..."

Aang arose."Well, I was chasing some girl."

"What girl?" Katara asked.

"I don't know. I heard laughing and I saw some girl in a fancy dress." Aang explained.

"Well, there must be a tea party here and we just didn't get our invitations!" cracked Sokka.

Katara looked down for a moment, mournfully."I thought I saw Mom."

That got Sokka's attention. "...Look, we were all just scared and hungry and our minds were playing tricks on us. That's why we all saw things out here.

Katara perked up." You saw something too?"

"Oh thank Dende it wasn't just me..." Vegeta exhaled with relief.

Sokka turned his head away." I thought I saw Yue. But, that doesn't prove anything. _(Turning back to the others)_ Look, I think about her all the time, and you saw Mom, someone you miss a lot."

"What about me? I didn't know the girl I saw. And all our visions led us right here." Aang realized.

" Okay... so where's here? Katara asked," the middle of the swamp?"

"Yeah, the center..." Aang trailed off

The four soon realize that they are standing before the most gigantic tree they had ever layed eyes on.

"My god..." Vegeta stared in awe,"It's the Tree of Might! Turles was right all along!"

Sokka turned to Vegeta in confusion,"The what and who was right all along?"

"No, it's the heart of the swamp," Aang explained, beholding the magnificent plant," it's been calling us here...I knew it." He smiled.

Vegeta blinked." Hold on a moment, are you telling me that it was _this thing_ that stranded us down here - stranded ME down here - and filled my mind with that hellish nightmare all along!?"

Katara put her hand to her chin in thought."Huh, if that's the case, maybe it was the tree that took your power away..."

"THAT'S IT! THE TREE DIES!" Vegeta blared, holding his hand out for another Little Bang Attack, before Aang zipped in front of the charging ki ball.

"Vegeta, wait! I don't think it took your bending away! I think it brought us here to tell us something!"

"To tell me what? That I'm a monster that destroys everything I love!? I've heard enough of that crap from all the people I've killed!"

"Well, in that case, maybe the tree has a point..." Sokka joked.

"Oh I'm sorry, smartass, would you like to join them?" Vegeta replied, directing the ki ball to the frightened Sokka."That's right, maggot, I'm the Prince of Saiyans! I do not answer the call of some hunk of wood! Now I suggest you run away as fast as you can before I blow this tree, this swamp, and every living thing in a hundred miles radius STRAIGHT TO-!"

"I'MBACK!" Hyu exclaimed as he exploded from the water, causing the four to scream in terror.

* * *

Later that day, the four were sitting around a campfire in the village of the Foggy Swamp Tribe, after a very big misunderstanding between them and the swamp's residents, whom it turned out were a community of waterbenders, including Hyu, who was merely bending the water in the plants to create a see-weed mobile suit to protect the giant tree. And Mai was there also, not that Vegeta cared.

"So, how you like that possum-chicken?" Due asked Sokka and Vegeta.

Sokka took another bite out of the meat."Tastes like arctic hen."

"I liken it more to space-poultry" Vegeta responded.

"So, where'd you say you were from?" Tho asked Vegeta.

"Vegeta," Vegeta responded.

"No, I know yer name, I was askin' about yer home."

"That _is_ my home, or at least it was until Frieza annihilated it..." he explained, _"Seriously, how did Nappa survive...How did RADITZ survive!?"_

"Oh..." Tho muttered awkwardly."...How in the hell did a freezer destroy yer home?"

"Not 'freezer', swamp-billy, Frieza - He was the one who destroyed my home" Vegeta explained, though he then questioned why he did to this moron.

"Ooh, was he was he one o' them firebenders?" Tho asked.

"Keh, I wish..." Vegeta lemented.

"Sorry, guys, Vegeta isn't exactly from these parts..." Katara said.

"I'm still trying to figure out where he's from," Sokka followed up.

"So how'd ya end up out here?" Hyu asked.

"That's what _I'm_ trying to figure out," Vegeta grunted,"I was traveling through the Dagobah System, when suddenly I started to lose consciousness, and my ship just shut down," he explained crosssing his arms,"Last thing I remember before passing out was a weird-looking comet..." he lamented.

This word caused Aang's eyes to grow in surprise."You saw a comet!?" Aang gasped.

"No, an omelet, what's it to you?" snapped Vegeta, surprised the primitive even knew what a comet was.

The Avatar rose to his feet."Because it sounds like you just described Sozin's Comet! It's a comet that flies around the world every hundred years; and when it does, it amplifies the power of every firebender, including the Fire Lord!"

"That's why we need to help Aang master all four elements and end the war; before the comet arrives by the end of the summer." Katara explained.

"So basically, it's like with Saiyans and a full moon?" Vegeta asked.

"You're people get stronger during a full moon? So do _my_ people! See, we have something in common!" Katara beamed.

The prince snorted, now picturing the annoying teenager turning into an Oozaru and destroying this planet for him.

"Hang on a minute..." Aang thought,"what if it was Sozin's Comet that took your power away? I mean, you did pass out right after seeing it, right?"

"You just said it makes people stronger, so why the hell would it make me weaker?" countered Vegeta.

"Trust me, Vegeta, if you're any indication, stuff only gets weirder as long as you're with us..." Sokka concluded, laking another munch out of his giant bug.

"I'll take you up on that..." Vegeta agreed. Still, as he stared at the kids, he couldn't help being reminded of seeing them as floating corpses calling out his name, along with all those other idiots on earth. What kind of madness was that? They were all dead, along with everyone he knew that were _actually_ dead. And at the crown of it all...him...

Vegeta shook his head. Whatever, he was _definitely_ dead, down to the last particle, Vegeta made sure of that. And yet, he didn't understand what that had to do with all of the clearly living people he saw. He couldn't make sense of it.

Didn't matter though: the Avatar had his mission, and the Saiyan had his: to get his power back, and get the hell off of this planet, with one question that stood in the way of both...

"How?" Vegeta vocalized.

"Actually, my name is Hyu." Hyu misunderstood.

"'Hyu' indeed..." Vegeta whispered, before taking another bite out of his possum chicken.


	5. Vegeta Day

It began as any other stupid day: after the stupid kids landed their stupid bison int the middle of a stupid clearing to camp out for the stupid night, and then he woke up to see the stupid light of the stupid sun peer into his eyelids. He turned to his stupid left to see the stupid lemur cramming its stupid arm into the stupid teen boy's throat for some reason (undoubtedly a stupid one)

"What are you doing in my mouth!?" the stupid teen warrior stupidly demanded."Momo you need to be little more sensitive to my boundries..." the stupid boy complained.

Of course, just then, the stupid sound of galloping was heard; a second later, another one of those stupid triceritops riding soldeirs leapt into view; a few stupid seconds later, a few more stupid riders emerged out of the stupid forestry, flanking him and the stupid kids around the stupid campfire.

"Give up! You're completely surrounded!" the stupid leader of the stupid riders announced stupidly.

A this, the stupid kids hastily sprung from their stupid sleeping postions as the stupid riders tried to attack them.

Vegeta yawned, slowly emerging out of his stupid sleeping sac to follow them. The stupid kids and Vegeta clumbed onto the stupid bison as the stupid Avatar commanded it to take off into the stupid sky.

"Wait, my [stupid] boomergang!" Sokka cried.

"There's no [stupid] time!" Katara replied.

"Oh I see, so there's time to get _your_ [stupid] scrolls time to get and _your_ [stupid] staff, but no [stupid] time to get _my_ [stupid] boomergang!?" he lamented sarcasticly.

"That's correct, [stupid]" was the waterbender's stupid response.

At this point Vegeta lost all interest in listening to the stupid kids, simply substututing the word 'stupid' for everything they said.

* * *

So the stupid kids continued their path on stupid foot, heading to a small stupid shack to get some stupid supplies.

At this point it was simple to deduce the Saiyans mood: he clearly wasn't all too happy about still being stuck with the children, although he wasn't really upset enough for it to genuinely vex him. At this point, Vegeta was maintaining pure indifference, not allowing anything to disturb him as before. For now, the Saiyan atleast had the comfort of a new set of armor to where: another one of Sokka outfits padded on the shoulders, chest, back and, chins with a special type of wood offered by the swamp dwellers (the skinny one insisted the wood was fireproof); and perhaps he could take a little pleasure in knowing that the goth girl Mai was experiencing a situation similar to his own, as she still was without outdoor clothing, aside from a brown cloak Vegeta allowed her to wear for modesty's sake. Of course that proved to be a rather difficult task, as the girl's expression was so void of emotion one might say she did not mind it at all.

"Sorry about your boomerang, Sokka..." the Avatar brought up.

"I feel like I've lost part of my identity," Sokka moped ,"Imagine if you lost your arrow, or if Katara lost her hair loopies..."

"Oh my, _none_ of us has ever experienced such a loss..." the unpowered Saiyan reminded.

The teen glared."Like I said, I lost the thing I actually _had_..." Sokka corrected himself.

" _I_ had clothes once..." the underwear-clad mai lamented.

The merchant at the vendor handed Katara the basket of food she requested. Sokka come forth to pay.

"Here's your produce, Pony-tail guy..." he thanked bubbily.

That only worsened Sokka depression."I used to be 'Boomerang Guy..."

"Never in all the days I have been with you have I ever heard anyone refer to you as that," Vegeta replied sternly.

"Well how do you know? You've only been here for like, what, a week!?" Sokka defended.

And then the merchant went on about how Katara payed with "Water Tribe money" and just accepted it as regular currency (why on earth would he do that? How does he know that coin isn't made of ice!?)

Honestly, Vegeta no longer cared, he was abstaining from caring, every time he inquired something of these nimrods, it _always_ resulted into somekind of heated dispute to which Vegeta either screams at the top of his lungs, or gets badly hurt, usually both in that order. Well not _this_ time, Vegeta thought as he walked away from the shack - no sirree, there was absolutley not _one thing_ that could come out of this random pidestrians mouth that could grasp the Saiyans attention so deeply that he would have totally no choice but to question him in the slightest: he was just gonna walk away, and hopfully aquire no oustanding memory of this character whatsoever.

"Happy Vegeta Day!" the vendor wished.

At the very sound, the Saiyan's joints locked so tightly as if he were a painted image; he remained in that position for a few more seconds, then instantly dashed for the man pinning his body against his own shack. **"What did you just say...?"** he hissed, pushing his forehead against the clerk's

"I mean, um! Happy Holiday!" the man censored himself, making sure not offend any one of different religion.

" _Vegeta Day!?"_ Aang repeated, while still no where near as unable to proccess it as Vegeta himself.

"w-well, yeah, y-you've never heard of Vegeta Day? There gonna be a big festival and..."

"Where is this day of which you speak celebrated!?" Vegeta demanded.

His lip quivered."i-in-in chi-Chin Village of course!" she almost whined.

The Saiyan flung the man aside, he then turned to the kids with a renewed fervor."Then that's where we're going..." he announced to the them, regardless of whether or not they headed there already...

* * *

The five continued there way down the main steet of the village, passing by buzziling villigers, verious stands for food and souviners, and chilren frollecking around with green streamers. If Vegeta weren't distracted by his objective, he might have been irritated to watch Mai rather casually announcing to anyone she passed by that she was from the Fire Nation, no doubt as an attempt to coax the clearly Earth Kingdom villigers to arrest her therefore free her from the rest of the group. Strangely enough, none of the villagers seemed to be moved in the slightest upon hearing of her statment, either from disbelief or simply not caring.

"I don't believe this," Katara marveled,"A holiday that has the same name is you, Vegeta!"

"No need to remind me, woman..." the Saiyan grumbled, still focused on getting to the bottem of this.

The waterbender blinked twice, and then smiled to herself _"he called me his 'woman'..._ " she missinterpreted.

"mmmmyess, indeed, what an awful coincidence, isn't it?..." Sokka stroked his chin with a smirk.

"Are you implying something, Sokka?"asked the bald child.

"You guys don't get it, do you?" he queried."If Vegeta were from space, then why would people of _our_ world be using a supposedly _alien_ name as their holiday?"

"Well, that would be no different form asking why we speak the same language..." Aang noted.

"Exactly! It just proves that Vegeta is obviously not from outer space! Heck, this place might even be his home town!"

"You cease your nonesense, child!" the Saiyan rebuked. Although, he had to admit the stupid teen brought up a not so stupid point: how could these ignorant natives possibly have a holiday in _his_ name? According to the Avatar, he and his friends were the first in their world's recorded history to make contact with an alien lifeform, let alone anything having to do with...

"Vegeta!"

"WHAT!?" he barked in response to Katara.

"It's a float of Avatar Kyoshi!" she pointed out to for the Saiyan to see a gigantic float of some woman in green samurai-like armor and white face paint.

The Saiyan blinked." _Avatar_ Kyoshi? I thought _you_ were the Avatar, so who is that?" he pointed for Aang.

"Oh, well, technically, that was also me..." he explained sheepishly.

The prince blinked, looking back and forth between the two."...I'm not seeing it..."

"Hey, here comes Avatar Roku!" Sokka pointed out to a another large float of an old man in red.

"Looks more like Space Santa to me..." Vegeta observed, feeling the strangest urge to destroy the float. He then blinked twice."Wait, so _he's_ the Avatar as well?"

"No no, see, the Avatar reincarnates after each lifetime into a different person," Katara explained."Aang is just one of _thousands_ of past lives..." she said.

The latest Avatar rubbed the back of his head."Actually, I've been having the sinking suspicion that Roku was over exagerating about the number of avatars - like, maybe they're just barely one hundred."

"Oh like I even care how many alter-egos you have!" the prince groaned."All I want to do now is get to the bottom if this enigma, and then we can be on our marry wa-" but he paused, now beholding the latest giant float to enter into his view, and apparently, the rest of the group (and maaayyyybe Mai if you looked hard enough) were also at a loss for words upon the sight of it.

"no...no...that-that can't be possible..." Vegeta breathed.

As the large shadow passed over them, they gawked at the sight of a gigantic float of one who was very much so not of this world, but very much so of Vegeta's - the king of it in fact.

"It...it's you..." Katara whispered in astonishment."...with a beard..." she added.

"That's not me, you naive peasant, that's my _father!_ " Vegeta blurted out of both ange and shock.

Indeed, it was nonother then King Vegeta, clothed in his brilliant armor with blood red shoulder pad and black spandex, even that little flower thing he wore around his neck, all captured within the display of paper and wood.

Sokka nudged his chin."Welp, I guess that settles it: if Vegeta's _dad_ is from this planet, then so is he." he declared.

But Vegeta could not hear him - he was too engrossed in utter shock of seeing his father, the King of Saiyans, being used as decoration for celebration for these primitive natives! How is this possible!? Was his father on this planet before!? And why would they be _commemorating him!?_

As they beheld the float, they caught sight of a random shirtless man in the distance, dashing toward the float of his father with a lit torch.

"What's that guy doing?" Katara wondered.

Her answer was realized as the four witnessed the man leap into the base of the King Vegeta float, popping out the other side while yelling, the torch's fire spreading all around the float.

Vegeta's mouth hung open"WHAT!?"

He watched as the same man dashed through the other two floats, setting them ablaze as well.

But what shook them the most, was the sound of the crowd cheering even harder than they did before.

"DOWN WITH THE AVATAR! DOWN WITH THE SAYAJINS!"

"d-d...down...with the _'Saiyijins'!?_ " Aang repeated in paralyzing shock.

"What's a Sayajin?" Mai wondered.

"Waaaaiit, isn't that what Vegeta said he was?" Sokka queried."Or, was is something different?"

"HOW DARE THEY DO THAT TO MY FATHER!" Vegeta exclaimed, charging ahead through he crowd, toppling citizens over seamlessly. He eventually made it to the torch guy, and punched him in the face so hard, he was sent flying away while the torch momentarily floated in the air.

The crowd kept on cheering regardless.

"Hey! That's not part pf the festival!"

Having heard this, crowd stopped cheering and went "oh" in unison...they then started haggling Vegeta.

Aang quickly leapt to Vegeta defense, landing beside him and using powerful airblast to blow away the fires off of the floats."What's going on here!?" Aang demanded.

"Took the words right out of my mouth, boy," Vegeta agreed.

"Who do you people think you are!?" whined a whiny-voiced man with a weird tall hat."You think you can just rush in here with with your disorder and violence!? Don't you know that running up to people and punching them in the face comes _after_ the customary dancing portion of the festival?" he inquired, speaking of the festivities.

"You pathetic worms think I care about your little customs!?" Vegeta roared."That's my FATHER you're desecrating!" he vocalized for all to hear.

The haggling crowd stopped...all was silent.

The tall hat man blinked, then leaned forward and took a good look at Vegeta. He then balked away in fear."nno _noooooooo..._ It cannot be...!" he whined in inner terror.

At this, the princes grimace morphed into a sinister smirk."Yes, I think you know precisely who I am..."

"A complete lunatic..." Sokka noted.

Vegeta then jumped into the air and landed atop the platform which the Roku floated stood on."That's right, humans, cower in fear for Vegeta, the son of Vegeta is upon you!" he announced to the gasping crowd.

They all cringed in horror.

"So...Vegeta Jr.?" Mai queried Sokka, who shrugged.

Katara immediately rushed in front of the crowd with raised hands."WAIT! What's the matter with you people!?"

"Didn't I kinda just ask that?" Aang asked.

"You fools!" the whiny man began,"have you no idea of whom that is!?" he pointed to Vegeta."It's a Saiyajin!"

"A Saiyajin!" a random man screamed.

"They've returned!" a woman added.

"Doooooom to us alllll!" Whaled an old man hysterically.

While Vegeta was enjoying their fear of him, he was slightly annoyed by their mispronunciation; no that it mattered - for the first time in such a long while, he was finally getting the recognition he deserved."Yes, the prince of 'Saiyajins' has come to claim revenge for the mockery of the king! I shall start with the youngest!"

Mothers feafully huddled their children.

"Then the oldest!"

Elders than pulled their children in front of them.

"Alright! ALRIGHT! THAT' ENOUGH! Sokka tried to quiet the crowd down."Now, could SOMEBODY TELL ME what the fuzz is all about!? It's just one guy!"

"No, not a 'guy' - an inhuman monster!" the whiny mayor exclaimed."Have you not heard the tales!? The Saiyajins were a race of ravenous savages that plagued the world with their evil! Three hundred years ago, they came and they annihilated homes, slaughtered hundreds of thousands, and laid waste to the entire continent! Nothing could stop them! their power was unlike even the strongest firebender - not even the great Ba Sing Se was spared from their wrath!" he dramatized.

Sokka stroked his chin contemplatively."sooo...you're saying that these 'saiyajins' were a race on earth?" he asked for clarification, completely oblivious to the horrific details of the man's tale.

"You mean...Vegeta's _people_ did this?" Aang exhaled in shock.

"How could you say that about Vegeta!?" Katara cried."He would never do that! In fact, I' confidant that _no_ Saiyan would, right Vegeta?" she asked softly.

"uuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhh..." Was all the Saiyan could say to the naive youth as he looked away.

"But wait a minute," Aang began,"If this holiday is supposed to be against the Saiyans, then why are you burning floats for Kyoshi and Roku?"

"Well, why not!? it was Avatar Kyoshi's duty to protect us in our time of need, but she failed! So we come together every year to spit on her grave for failing us!" the whiny man explained.

A deep-voiced man behind the mayor scratched his temple"'Course Avatar Kyoshi's grave's on a whole'nuther island, and those people won't let us have our festival there, so we just settle for spitting on everything having to with her, including this float," he demonstrated by spitting on it himself.

The mayor complement this by spitting on it as well.

Soon, the whole crowd was spitting at the Avatar floats, sending a rain of loogie upon the group.

 **"WILL YOU STOP IT ALREADY!?** " Vegeta howled, flailing his arms wildly. As a response an additional loogie landed on his forehead."WHO DID THAT!?"

Sokka sneakily wiped his spit from his lip.

"Look, can't we just have a chance to clear Vegeta's name?" Aang asked.

"The only way to prove whether or not he's a Saiyajin is to stand trial" the mayor said, putting his wide sleeves together."Until then, he will have to stay in the town prison."

"BAH! As if I would humble myself to you lowly humans!" Vegeta naturally objected."There is no way any of you will put me in a cage - you're _not_ going to arrest me, and you are most _certainly_ not going to take away my clothes,"he concluded, crossing his arms defiantly.

 **Two minutes later...**

The prince chuckled."You see? I've been standing in this same spot for over two minutes and you cowards haven't done a thing!" he gloated, right before he was hit in the head with a flying rock, knocking him off the platform.

* * *

The Saiyan, once again stripped to his underwear, was currently restrain via wooden stock and behing a row of metal bars."I really hate this planet..."

"Really sorry, Vegeta, but they wouldn't take Water Tribe money..." Aang apologized, standing just outside the bars.

"Maybe if you didn't breath on it, the money wouldn't have melted," Mai speculated."Also, I'm Fire Nation, can I be arrested too?" she asked the guard, who shook his head.

"What I don't get is why they think Vegeta's people invaded the earth," Katara wondered.

"Yeah, you're right," Aang nodded," I mean, if it was that significant and happened three hundred years ago, it should be common history by now."

"And if it was that long ago, there's _no_ way that was supposed to be Vegeta's father..." the waterbender added.

Sokka once again stroked his chin contemplatively."hhhhhhhhhmmmmmm...Aang, are you sure there are only _four_ elements?"

The Avatar blinked."Of course, why?"

"Because..." the teen began cooly, slowly putting on an odd hat with a revolving spectacle."It looks like someone's _bending the truth."_

 ***cue CSI Miami theme***

* * *

Mixing things up a bit, we shall now move on to the other characters at this point, so as not to give the reader the impression that their very purpose is simply to serve as mediums for the main protagonist's torment.

They were now following the mayor of the village to a small temple near the cliff-side with a statue of an unknown man covered in some ancient military attire.

"This is the crime scene..." Mayor Tong (we are doing this from the Gaang's perspective, so the subjective nicknames shall subside for now) announced to the group.

At this, Sokka blinked."Hang on, 'crime scene'? I thought this was supposed to be some kind of long forgotten war, not a homicide case..." he reminded.

The mayor crossed his arms."Well, excuse me for not using the perfectly appropriate jargon! Crime, war crime, what's the difference!?" he flung his hands in the air."anyway, This is the footprint of the killer, Vegeta Sr," he announced, pointing to a certain foot print imprinted in the stone ground." It was at sunset three hundred and seventy years ago today that he descended from the sky with his forces to begin their invasion of the Earth Kingdom." He gestured up the aforementioned statue."Our beloved Chin the Great did all he could to hold off the Saiyajins' horde of ferocious little green people while the town was evacuated. Chin and his men fought hard; much blood was spilled on either end: legends say that the earthbenders began to bend together to hurl whole chunks of the island at the enemy, thus making the island much smaller, and one of the gargantuan mountains missed and landed in another part of the world, becoming known as Kyoshi Island..." he narrated theatrically.

The Avatar stared at the statue."So, they came from the sky?"

Katara gazed up at the clouds."I knew it! Vegeta must be from space!

"Waywaitwaitwait..." Sokka rapidly swayed his hands for the mayor to stop for a moment,"Little green people? I thought you were invaded by Saiyans, so what's with those things?" he asked.

"Well, obviously they were demons that the first Vegeta summoned to overtake the kingdom..." the mayor explained (speculated, honestly).

"What did they look like?" Aang asked.

"How would I know that!? I wasn't there!..." the mayor defended

"Then how do you know all this stuff about the green people and the island throwing even happened?" Mai drolled.

"What do you mean 'how'? The same way all members of the village know of it!" the mayor continued."It was passed down from our ancestors!"

"Did your ancestors pass down any actual evidence?" Mai asked.

The mayor began to perspire profusely."Ugh, w-well um...we have no evidence as I know of uh-but surely there must be some relics from the invasion on Kyoshi Island!" he defended."After all, it was her who fled to that make-shift island to escape the utter shame of failing to save us from the Saiyajins!"

The goth shrugged."Then I guess it's off to Kyoshi Island..."

"Aang, do you think Vegeta's dad really did all this?" Katara whispered to the Avatar.

"I dunno..." he shrugged."But I guess it would make sense why these people would even know about the Saiyans in the first place..." he explained. Just then, his pondering expression was shrouded by an epiphany."aw dangit! I thought we were the first humans to ever meet space people!" he lamented woefully.

"By the time I'm through, you're all gonna feel like idiots for even believing in space people..." Sokka boasted edgily.

Aang sighed."I hope our Vegeta's doing well..."

* * *

And, once more, the day went on like the previous:

Vegeta was minding his own business with the stupid kids, then they end up in a new place where they confront some senile characters; and right when things appear as though the Saiyan is about to come across something useful...he loses his clothes and is trapped/separated from the kids.

The prince would have grudgingly blamed the Avatar for this, but he reconciled the idea as mere petty squabble at this point. And speaking of this point...

There are apparently a few things that Vegeta's father was hiding from him, from the conquest of an unknown world to battling the Avatar to evidently being a _lot_ older than even the prince estimated. Really, it wasn't the fact that the Saiyan's conquest or his father's staggering age that surprised him: it was the fact that this planet and its population had somehow managed to survive a full blown Saiyan invasion. There should a not be a single rock left of this planet, let alone, well, this planet! Obviously, that mayor was lying to him...unless...

...unless the Saiyans of the past suffered the same ki-crippling ailment as himself? But how? Did Avatar Kyoshi do it? Was there just something about this planet that naturally drains the ki of ki-wielding warriors?

"hm...no bald head...no tattoos..." ominously began a voice from the shadows on the other end of the tiny prison yard; before Vegeta walked into the light a lean, intimidating-looking man with no shirt and a serpentine tatto running along his chest; there appeared to be a metal brace around his neck. Without warning, the man madly charged for the Saiyan while screaming, but before he could make it to him, the chain attached to the brace runs out of length, snapping straight an stopping the man just a few feet short of the Saiyan."You're not gonna fit real well in here..." he finished forebodingly.

Not that it needed to be said, but Vegeta's expression was as dull as Mai's."In what dimension do you think you will honestly frighten me?" he inquired as Mai would.

"What's that supposed to mean? You sayin you ain't afraid of me?" the inmate growled.

"I am simply lamenting the fact that the little elephant shrew that scurried by a few seconds ago offered a more potent jumpscare than your pathetic display..." Vegeta lamented.

"oooooooh, So THAT'S how it's gonna be, huh?" the man grunted,"You just wait til I get this dang chain offa me, then we'll see who the pathetic one is!"

At this, the Saiyan broke out of his wooden restraint, arose, and tore the metal collar off of the man neck.

"'m waiting..." Vegeta said, crossing his arms expectantly.

The now free to move inmate gazed at the shorter male in shock, drips of sweat sliding down his temples."uuuuuuuuhhh..."

"That's what I thought you said..." the prince replied before punching the man in the gut, sending him flying back to the other end of the yard.

"Whoah! That was awesome!" one other inmate marveled.

"Do it again!" a larger inmate arose and picked up the tattooed inmate, only to shove him back toward the prince.

"Sure..." Vegeta obliged, punching the man straight back to the end of the yard a second time."Now then, unless you wish for me to do the same to you, you will answer me a few questions..."

"duh, sure, spiky dude; whaddya wanna know?" a fourth inmate asked.

"What do you people know of...The Saiyajins? He inquired dramatically.

An awkward silence fell.

The inmates looked between eachother.

"...Well...?" Vegeta quired impatiently.

One inmate shrugged."Well, I'm pretty sure 'saiyajin' is another way of saying 'vegetable man' but other than that..."

That was as far as he got, before the "vegetable man" seized him by the throat."Wrong answer, human..." hissed with narrowed eyes.

"Whoah! Calm down, man," the fat inmate tried."What he meant to say was we don't no nothin' about the Saiya-people or whatever."

"What are you talking about!?" Vegeta demanded as the inmate in his grasp silently bagged for air."The Saiyan's invaded your planet and ravaged the continent - this should be common history!"

"Well, either it never happened, or there were no survivors to record it, 'cause I got nothin'" another inmate concluded.

The man still being choked, Vegeta stroked his chin with his free hand - the latter was most likely the truth; however, if that were the case, there would be no life left on this planet to even hold this conversation with. Still, that continued to beg the question as to why and how this particular race still knew of the Saiyans.

This was going to require some serious investigation; but first, he had to get out of here to do that investigating...

"Alright then, here's the deal: I shall help free you degenerates, and in return, you will assist me in securing the town hall," Vegeta announced.

"huh? Why the hall?" another inmate asked.

"Just say yes! Please say yes...!" the inmate being choked begged them.

"Well, obviously, if there were any evidence of an alien invasion, it would be hidden somewhere within the central governments building," Vegeta explained.

The fat inmate blinked."You think the government would hide something like that? Why would they keep secrets about cataclysmic events from their own people?"

The Saiyan rolled his eyes."If you ever make it to Space-America, you'll understand..." he dropped the previous inmate to the ground."Now, we are going to have to plan this carefully; the guards can easily outnumber us, and given that you are all nonbenders, you will not be able to defend yourself..."

"hang on a second," one inmate interupted,"What gave you the idea that we're nonbenders? I'm an earthbender."

"me too," added another inmate.

"And so is he," another pointed to another.

"Heck, that guy you were choking is a firebender," said the bald, tattooed one.

The prince looked among the inmates in disbelief."What!? What are you talking about? You can't be earthbenders; if you were, then why would they place you all an a cell carved from stone?"

The prisoners stared at Vegeta, not sure what he was leading to.

"...That you can bend!" he finally added in frustration.

The fat one shrugged sheepishly."Well, most of us figured since these guards went through all the trouble to lock us up, we'd come off as rude if we tried to bend our way out..."

Silence...

Vegeta's brow twitched - he wasn't too miffed, though, being used to this sort of thing..."Sometimes, I wonder if I'll ever be free from the fog of eternal idiocy that ever seeks to consume me..." with that, he raised his palm to the bars of the entrance."LITTLE BANG ATTACK!"

In a flash, the cage was blown to ashes, blasting the nearby guards off their feet.

As the inmates gazed in wonder at the smoldering edges of the entrance, Vegeta could only smirk."Like Arlia all over again..."

* * *

Needless to say, the citizens of Kyoshi Island were elated to see the Avatar's bison descending down on their land once more. Of course one of them was a bit too elated, the young lad once again earning his infamous title of "Foamy". And since the Avatar was actually there, there was no need for any awkward embarrassment.

"Is he okay...?" Mai quered.

"Dah, he's fine..." the village leader blew it away with a hand.

"Oyagi, our friend is in jail. The town of Chin says his father wiped out their village." Katara explained.

"And everything else, allegedly..." Sokka added.

"hm, Sounds unfortunate, but in what way does this require our help?" the not so whiny leader asked.

The Avatar shrugged."Well, it kinda' has to do with him being part of an extraterrestrial race of super warriors."

The leader was stumped."...extra-whatnow?"

"He's from space..." Mai explained.

The leader gawked." You mean to tell me that the people of Chin Village claim that their people and the Earth Kingdom were ravaged by Spacemen!? That is preposterous!"

"Well, it's nice to know I can relate to someone in the sense department..." Sokka gratified.

The leader chuckled while crossing his arms."Everyone knows that the Earth Kingdom was ravaged by an army of giant fire-breathing monkeys - it's common history!" stated factually.

Silence...

At this, Sokka's very pony tail drooped lower."Sometimes, I wonder if I'll ever be free from the fog of eternal idiocy that ever seeks to consume me..." he lamented.

Even the Avatar found this a tough swallow."umm, so, anyway, the leader of Chin said you might have some relics from that...event..."

The leader knodded."Ah, yes, we keep them within the shrine dedicated to Avatar Kyoshi that was built to commemorate her legendary victory over the giant monkeys!" he said."Follow me," he walked away and gestured for them to follow.

Katara and Aang looked at eachother.

"Victory?" Aang repeated.

"But the other guy said Kyoshi could never defeat the Saiyans..."

"He also didn't mention any giant monkeys..." Mai noted

Sokka eyed the goth."I'm sorry, since when did you get a voice in our discussions?"

"Since your big buff body guard from space vanished..." Mai replied.

"HE'S NOT FROM SPACE!" Sokka defended.

"Guys, we're getting off the subject!" Aang reminded."We might actually have proof that it wasn't the Saiyans who terrorized the Earth Kingdom!"

"Hey, you prove what you want; all I'm here for is to prove to you two that there is no such thing as space people!" Sokka concluded, storming off to follow the village leader to the temple.

Mai and Aang followed suit.

Katara, now alone, was provoked into momentarily fantasizing about Vegeta as her own personal body guard."mmm..."

* * *

Meanwhile back at Chin Vili-

 ***BOOOOOM***

Villagers ran for their lives as Vegeta and he newly formed gang of benders terrorized the village.

Various carts , animals, and and people were launched into the sky with upshooting columns of earth. Buildings were bashed with boulders that reaped large damage to the interior.

The authorities tried their best to hold off the troupe, but their efforts were in vain, and they their failure was sealed with Vegeta, proudly riding atop an ostrichhorse and firing ki balls from his hand.

"AHAHAHHAHHAHAH! Flee! Fleee from Vegeta!" the Saiyan practically cheered over the the screams of the villagers.

Yes, this was it: the feeling of complete domination the prince had been denied for so long! First, it all started with that miserable clown of a Saiyan Kakarot, and everything went down hill from there. But now, as he rode this suddenly magnificent bird-equine hybrid, he new felt his prestige returning to him!

"THERE! The town hall is before us!" Vegeta pointed to the larger building in the distance.

The former inmates roared happily as a response.

Suddenly, the whiny mayor popped into view from the open window."Hey! I'll have you know that happy roaring is outlawed!" he then gasped at the sight of the group's leader.

"CHAAAARRGE!" Vegeta ordered the inmates, as he and they bashed through the remaining forces like a flashflood.

* * *

Meanwhile, in Kyoshi's shrine...

"This piece is called 'The Birth of Kyoshi'" the leader explained to the group, gesturing to the large mural on the wall ."It was painted three hundred and seventy years ago this day, on the day of the Avatar's victory against the giant monkeys."

The mural was a depiction of a vague replica of the very cliffside they stood on, with a crown of cheering citizens in the right, the shrine in the middle, and (most strikingly) what looked like Avatar Kyoshi standing victoriously on top the bloody corpse of one of the alleged giant monkeys.

"I just don't get it..." Aang contemplated."what do these giant monkeys have to do with the Saiyans?"

"Beats me; I'm still on the 'this is all a bunch of hippocow leavings' platform..." Sokka reminded.

"I believe I can assist you..." the leader reassured.. He paced over to a chest on the side of the room. opened it, and pulled out what looked like an aged set of blood red upper body armor.

"Hey! That looks like what Vegeta's dad was wearing!" Aang realized.

"Apparently, the monkeys were guided by somekind of leader, but the leader was never seen with the monkeys at the same time," the village leader said.

"So, there is no connection?" Katara wondered.

Just then, a disturbing thought came upon the Avatar."Unless...the Saiyans...turned into the monkeys...?"

"can't...even...comprehend..." Sokka muttered, august at his friend's imagination.

"I cannot answer that...but, that is not the only relic we have kept..." the leader paused, reaching back into the chest and producing an equally aged wooden case."Behold..." he flipped the case open for the kids to see"... the tail of the very giant monkey in the painting!"

An awkward silence fell...

"...What...?"

Peculiarly, the tail itself was not nearly as large as the youths expected.

Sokka blinked."Well, judging from the length of this thing, those firebending monkeys couldn't been all that big."

"Heck, that could be from any monkey. And how'd it even last this long without decaying?" Mai quired.

"Probably not even real..." added Sokka.

The leader huffed."Well, it might appear that way to any outsider, but any resident shall tell you that this tail, upon being cut off, shrunk down this size - it's longevity is undeniable proof that it came from a supernatural monkey."

Aang stroked his chin."I don't understand. I all this stuff between what the mayor and you told us doesn't add up."

"No kidding," Katara agreed," I mean, on one hand there was Vegeta's dad - a space man - with an army of green demon's that defeated Kyoshi; but then they're are these giant monkey spirits that may have been led by Vegeta's dad who might not have been from space that Kyoshi did defeat."

Aang nodded."Alright, so that leaves is us with either green people or giant monkeys and whether or not Kyoshi defeated them..."

"Guys, we're missing an important part of the story!" Sokka announced, gathering the others' attention."This painting was made on the _same date_ the mayor of Chin claimed the invasion itself began: if Vegeta's dad was already defeated on that day, he couldn't have attacked Chin village or the Earth Kingdom!"

The Avatar smiled."So not only did Kyoshi defeat the Saiyans, the fact that she did it on that day would make Vegeta Sr. innocent!" he beamed."Vegeta's gonna be so happy when we get back...!"

* * *

Later that night, as the Gaang flew back toward Chin Village, they could see the flames, ruins, and utter chaos resonating across the village.

"0.0" Aang gawked.

"O0O" Katara sputtered.

"o_0!?" Sokka demanded.

"-_-..." Mai shrieked.

* * *

Rocks and ki balls flew from their respective ends of the hall; the whiny mayor was cowering behind his desk as the guards on the other side of the door fought with all that had, gnawing on his stupid hat in fear.

Just then, the door was blown off its hinges by a flash of light, scaring the mayor out of his hiding spot and forcing him to hesitantly peal over the desk; the smoke cleared to reveal the triumphant Saiyan prince and his band of inmates.

"Alright then, mayor..." Vegeta began venomously,"You locked me up without a word and left me to rot, but now, it's time to answer a few questions..."

The inmates rooted for their new leader.

As the Saiyan progressed for forward, the mayor stammered into the right corner with hands spread."n-Now l-listen to me, you brutish ruffian! I'll have you know that I will not tolerate this behavior in my village! You believe you can stomp in here on my fine rugs imported from Gaoling and intimidate me into giving you a pardon, but I am more stern than I look...!"

At this Vegeta stopped." A 'pardon'? A 'pardon'!?" His laughter humiliated the mayor. Vegeta turned to his henchmen."You hear that, boys? He's considering giving me a pardon!"

The inmates cheered victoriously.

The Saiyan deadpanned. No time to rebuke, he turned back to the mayor."The only 'pardon' I'm looking for is to pardon your skin from being attached to your miserable body," he spat, before leaning down and seizing the cowardly mayor by the collar."Unless of course...you can fulfill this one request..."

"Please tell me it doesn't involve dying!?" the mayor begged.

"Oh no, you're still going to die, but if you tell me the truth about my father's coming, I'll make it quick and painless," Vegeta explained.

"What!? I already told you what happened! The Saiyajins came and the Avatar failed and...!"

"NO! THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH!" the prince lurched into the mayor's face."How did your people survive that encounter!? What happened to the Saiyans that made them lose their ki!?"

"VEGETA!" the voice of Aang cried as he and his friends rushed into the office."What are you doing!?"

"What's it look like I'm doing, boy? I'm showing this fool never to mess with a Saiyan regardless of what state he's in," Vegeta replied.

"But you don't understand!" Sokka tried."We actually pieced together an alibi to prove your people's innocence!"

"Basically, we figured out the whole thing is a load of komodo-crap..." Mai elaborated.

"I don't care about proving anything!" Vegeta objected."In fact, I agree with just about everything this man had told me!"

"You WHAT!?" Sokka gaped.

"HAH! So you confess!" The mayor vocalized, flinging his finger at the Saiyan.

Once again, Vegeta pulled him closer, this time with a sneer."Ohohoh, not only do I confess..." he paused, charging a ki ball in his free hand,"I'm going to prove to you and this village the utter brutality of the Saiyan race!"

"YEEEEAAAAAH! KILL'EM!" the inmate cheered on.

"Vegeta, don't!" Aang yelled.

"There's another way to do this!" Sokka exclaimed.

"You're gonna get us all executed..." Mai said.

"Vegeta, if you love me, you won't hurt him!" Katara begged.

...silence...

All eyes were on the sheepish waterbender, who twiddled her thumbs."...um, too soon?"

Taking advantage of the prince's bewildered gaze, the mayor pulled a dart from out of his sleeve and jammed it into the Saiyan's wrist; Vegeta's whole body convulsed and plopped to the floor. His mouth guzzled with suds.

The mayor arose triumphantly to his feet, folding his fingers inside his sleeves once more."Shirshu dart: works every time..."

* * *

The next morning, the prince found himself shackled within a metal stock, sitting at the center of an assembly of the village citizens before the village shrine.

So many profane and shameful words the Saiyan wanted to blurt out, but the combination of pointlessness and the fact that his lip muscles were still a bit numb from the toxin deterred the idea. The prince had also wasted a great portion of his already skim supply of ki, so any physical resistance was out of the option; at least if he was to be hanged, he wouldn't die alone, as the other inmates who assisted Vegeta in the rebellion (as in all of them) were arranged around him in similar restraints, glaring at him with all the hatred that they could muster.

The oh-so whiny mayor paced dramatically between the crowd and the shackled Saiyan, shooting a finger at him."Last night, this heresy of a human being stormed into your mayor's town hall and assaulted on his very life!"

"You're already assaulting your life with that outfit; I was only helping..." Vegeta retorted.

"ooooooh, Burn!" one inmate encouraged, much to the disdain of the others.

"Clearly this, from his great ferocity to his strange ability to shoot sunlight from his hands, which may I remind you is what was told the first Vegata could do, this man is undoubtedly a descendant of the Saiyajins - a fact to which he openly confessed to me - and must be destroyed from the face of existence!"

The villagers screamed in approval.

Sokka leaned to Vegeta's left."Okay, look, I've read over the laws of this crazy village, and there actually is no penalty for physical assault- it all depends on the mayor's verdict, and nothing else; all we have to do is convince him to left you off the hook..."

"So how are you going to do that? Is the goth going to seduce him?" Vegeta retorted irritably.

The teen shrugged."We thought of that, but then I thought of something that could do the trick in a more moderately ethical way: just wait for it..."

"Mayor!" Katara suddenly called, hand raised."We call a surprise witness to the stands!"

"A witness!?" Whiny Mcmayorface repeated."We have no need for witness in our court system!"

The Saiyan's jaw hung, though his lips did not part."You don't use witnesses?"

"Pah! We don't waste out time with such things as 'witnesses' or 'evidence' - that's why we call it 'justice', because it's just-us!" he laughed at his own wit.

His right cheek twitch."How do people even remember how to eat?..."

"Oh but this witness is a very special witness - one who witnessed the Saiyan invasion with her own eyes: Avatar Kyoshi!"

The crowd, the inmates, the mayor, and even Vegeta himself was shocked to hear this revelation. Of course then, common sense kicked in, prompting the Saiyan to smirk."Now I get it: they found some actress and payed her off to play the role of the deceased avatar-ess; and here I thought these kids were stupid..."

As he finished the thought, he saw who apparently was the actress walking into view before the whole assembly concealing her face with a pair of golden fans; strange how diminutive she was - in fact, she looked to be around the same height as...

The prince's eyes widened.

No...

The "actress" pulled the fans away, revealing the face of the current Avatar, his mug covered in white make and lipstick and his body adorned with the clearly loose-fitting replica armor of the aforementioned female avatar."teehee, hey, everybody, Avatar Kyoshi here!" he greeted while feigning a mature feminine voice.

One could even see the crown of the Saiyan's spiky hair dipping a tad lower than usual. "You...you inept...idiotic... braindead, worthless, INSIPID MORON!" his voice echo throughout the village."BY DENDE, I ALWAYS KNEW YOU WEREN'T FULLY CAPABLE OF ANY COGNITIVE REFLECTION, BUT WHAT POISONOUS GAS FUMES ACTUALLY POSSESSED YOU TO THINK-!"

In that very instant, the Avatar was swallowed by a mass of swirling dust; the ground, surroundings, and sky were darkened by a beige hue; the boy's silhouette in the twister vanished, and was replaced with he shadow of a much taller individual. The twister dispersed to reveal a tall, steel-eyed grown woman, wearing the very same kamino armor and make up the boy was wearing, only these clothes fit her perfectly.

"I killed Chin the Conqueror..." Avatar Kyoshi began abruptly,"A horrible tyrant, he attempted to gather control over the continent. When he came to the penisula where we lived, he demanded our immediate surrender. I told him that I would not sit passively while he takes away our home, but he would not back down. On that day, we split from the mainland. I created Kyoshi Island so my people could be safe from invaders."

"Question..."

Kyoshi paused, turning to the raised finger of Mai.

"What's any of that stuff got to do with Vegeta?" the goth inquired.

" 'Vegeta'?" Kyoshi repeated. It was then the former Avatar took notice of the half-naked Saiyan prince in question. The tall woman blinked in surprise."Vegeta!?"

"Miss..." he greeted glibly, waved his restrained hand.

The entire village was frozen, all anxiously waiting for the past avatar's reaction. Would she be afraid of Vegeta? Sorrowful? Indifferent? Would she lament her victory? Or wallowed in the shame of her defeat?

"Please be the last two besides the fifth one, please be the last two besides the fifth one..." Sokka prayed mentally.

However, it turned out to be none of those predicted emotions; instead, if one was able to look closely enough, he might very well see that beneath the cloak of thick white make up were a pair of red flushed cheeks.

As far as her expression was concerned, a sudden heir of indignation played out on the woman's face."...yoouuu Bloated pig!"

"eh?" Was all Vegeta could utter, before the former Avatar smacked the Saiyan across his face.

The village gasped.

The space warrior was flabbergasted"wwuhwhat What was that for-!?"

"Don't you give me that, you back-stabbing serpent! You know full well what you did to me!" Kyoshi berated the confused Saiyan, furiously leaning above his face.

"Bu-But I did nothi-!" Vegeta started.

"I saved you, nurtured you, gave you find a home..." she went on.

"I don't even know you-" Vegeta tried again.

Closing her eyes, she placed her hands upon her heart," and for while, I honestly thought that night at the Misty Palms Oasis actually meant something..." she reopened them, glaring at the prince,"Oh, but only then did I finally see you for the cruel monster Yangchen tried to convince me you are..."

"Yangwha-?" he repeated

"You know, one would have thought that after what she did to you and your people, you would have been humbled in your weakness, especially considering that vessel we tirelessly built together!"

At this point, the entire crowd was captivated by the the previous Avatar sudden emotional breakdown, afraid to speak a word that would disturb her in the slightest; even Sokka found himself sitting in the stalls, eagerly munching on salted earth flakes in fasination.

"Vessel!? Look, you're not making any sense-!"

She wiped a single tear from her eye as she sniffed."You told me you would show me the universe in a way I could've never imagined...well, you certainly showed me something: a universe's worth of HEARTBREAK!" she waled, her voice crumpled by her forlorn demeanor.

"Granted, this is starting to sound awfully familiar, but I'm pretty sure..."

"I Don't know why you've returned, Saiyan, but I am honestly glad you are helpless again: I can assure you will receive no sympathy from this avatar...!" she concluded, turning and stomping away from the crowd.

At this point Vegeta's jaw was threatening to fall off."WAIT! Where are you going!? What weakness!? What's a Yangchen!? WHAT HAPPEN TO THE SAIYANS!?" he practically begged her as she ignored him. As she did so, the little twister from before consumed her, ,making her vanish; the hue of reality returned to normal, and the twister dissipated, revealing the current avatar who fell to the ground unconscious.

His two blue-clad friends ran to him and helped him up; Aang arose to awareness."ugh...what happened...?" he asked weakly, and blinked in confusion,"And why do I have the weird sensation that the air between me and Vegeta will never be the same again...?"

Sokka didn't quite know how to relate this information to the boy, so settled with how it related to the subject,"ugh, well, the good news is, Vegeta Sr. never killed Chin the Great..."

Katara grimaced."But, the bad news is..."

" _YOU_ DID IT!" the mayor finished, furiously pointing his finger at the young Avatar," It was Avatar Kyoshi who murdered our beloved Chin the Great! I, Mayor Tong, hereby find Avatar Aang guilty! Bring out the wheel of punishment!"

But, just then, a random explosion caught the attention of the crowd; they all trun dramatically to see the Rough Rhinos halting into view.

"We've come to claim this village in the name of our Fire Lord!" the stupid leader announced,"Now show be your leader so that I may..." one of his men sliced a stature in half with a halberd "...dethrone him..."

Said mayor was frozen solid in fear."ummmmm..." he meekly points to Vegeta "...He's the leader..."

Colonel Mongke's subordinates looked to him for an answer; the leader shrugged. The Yu Yan archer drew his bow and arrow and shot at Vegeta, who quickly jerked his body and the stock to the left, causing the arrow to strike and break off the lock holding the stock in place. The Saiyan broke free and immediately cupped his hands forward, blast a large ki shot that knocked Mongke off his Rhino.

"Avatars! Assemble!" Sokka cried out at the spur of the moment as he, his sister, his friend, and even the goth charged into battle.

* * *

The enemy having been subdued, the village now resumed its celebration, only now with the group as their guests of honor.

"Let it be remembered this day that the Prince of Saiyans and the Avatar redeemed themselves by saving our home from the Rough Rhinos!" the mayor announced the crown, who cheered in agreement.

"Well, this was quite the turn-around..." Sokka noted.

"I'm just glad it turned out okay..." Katara lamented.

"I can't believe Mai killed members of her own nation..." Aang recalled with a very sober expression, staring into nowhere,"they might have been here to rescue her!"

The goth shrugged."Meh, I'm a self-hater..."

The waterbender blinked as she recalled something."What about all that stuff Kyoshi said? Did she and Vegeta Sr. have somekind of...relationship?

"It they did..." Sokka began," it just points further to the fact that this Vegeta is from this world..."

"You think you could drop that for five seconds!?" said Vegeta growled."However, you three are beginning to make a point: the woman mentioned something about a person named 'Yangchen' and that she apparently did something to my father that made him 'weak'..."

"So maybe what ever this Yangchen person did to your dad and the Saiyans, it's affecting you!" Aang vocalized.

"Indeed..." Vegeta nodded,"Now all we need to figure out is who this Yangchen was and just how she accomplished this feat..."

Sokka blinked."I'm sorry, 'we'? Maybe that's your mission to figure out who you are, but our mission is to train Aang to master all four elements and defeat the Fire Lord, and I am confidently certain there is and will never be any other matter more pressing than the matter I have just spoken of..." Sokka settled, inserting another mass of unfried dough into his mouth. After a few chews he muttered,"worst. village. ever..."

Meanwhile, Azula and Ty Lee were riding into a another Fire Nation encampment.

* * *

The princess was quite annoyed, having sent multiples letters announcing her arrival, and yet, not only was there not a single reply received, but it appeared as though not a single soldier had exited one of the tents to greet them.

In fact, as far and she and Ty Lee could tell, the camp itself appeared empty, devoid of any person whatsoever, as if a great predator had come and devoured them all. Absence - yet a second example of impudence.

"Oh, this is unforgivable!" Azula complained." These have to be the most disgraceful warriors in all the Fire Nation! Why have none of them replied to us!?"

At this, Ty Lee tapped her chin tentatively."Well...it could be because they're all dead..." she noted.

Azula noticed this as well, the whole camp covered with the bodies; some tent were torn open, cart hauled over, stains of blood here and there, and even a few tanks with wholes ripped into them."Hm...they are dead..."

Of course, this promoted another irritated thought:

"Why are they dead!?" the princess demanded.

The gymnast then cartwheeled off her giant gecko and bent over to scan one of the bodies."hmmm...Hey! This armor is empty!" she point to it with her big toe.

"Empty?" At this, Azula scanned the rest of the "corpses" herself: as far as she could tell, there were no dead bodies at all, just bits and pieces of armor and clothing sprawled across the encampment."What is this?"

Ty Lee scratched her hair."Maybe they all went skinny-dipping at the same time?"

Unknown to the two, they were being watched from above...a small smirk appeared on the figure's face.

"Then they would have taken their clothes with them instead of just leaving them in the camp, not that that would have accounted for the destruction..."

"If I may, you highness..."

The two girls jolted in surprise.

"...I may be able to assist you with this conundrum of yours..."

They attempted to follow the voice, but found themselves turning their heads to the sky, their lips parting in shock. Their eye followed the figure as it slowly descended, carrying the last surviver of the camp with him.

"However, I would have to answer your question...with another question..."

A pair of yellow and black boot-like feet made contact with the ground, dropping the man to the ground.

The pale face smirked even wider.

"Wanna see me drink this guy?"


	6. Banditwoman V Saiyaman: Dawn of Rumble

"PULL!"

Mai pulled the lever.

A dish was launched into the sky, getting blown to bits by a small ki blast.

"PULL!" Vegeta shouted again.

This time, Mai launched three dishes into the air at once, which were each blasted with ki balls almost as fast as for the single one.

"PULL!" a third time Vegeta exclaimed.

For this one, Mai launched in sequence several plates, bowls, cups, chopsticks, birds, and money, all of of which the Saiyan blasted out of the sky without discretion.

A short time after departing from that psychotic village, the group had landed in a clearing near the wealthy town of Goaling, which was evidently the Space Palm Springs of the Earth Kingdom. The stupid kids went into town to shop for supplies (and apparently a new bag, as Sokka had complained about not having one), thus leaving finally leaving Saiyan prince to his lonesome without him ending up in somekind of cartoonish escapade.

For once in his life, Vegeta had to be thankful to the great little Namekian in the sky: since he lost the bulk of his ki to whatever unseen force, he's had precious few moments such as these to get some decent training done, albeit at the children's expense (whatever, they went to the market, they can buy some more stuff...oh wait, did I just blast the money...?).

Regardless, it gave him time to brood on important matters: now according his father's alleged lover, Vegeta Sr. along with a whole host of other Saiyans had invaded this earth centuries and ago but had something "done to them" by a woman named Yangchen - a sorceress perhaps? Whatever was done to them, it was clearly affecting him as well; what Vegeta's current objective appeared to be was to find out the identity of Yangchen, and perhaps then he could discover this power draining anomaly that seems to envelope this planet and destroy it.

The prince couldn't help but revel in the idea of his power returning; he could imagine the Avatar, his dumb friends, that princess, her dumb friends, and maybe even that "Zuko" person Sokka mentioned, all present to witness the return of the universe's last remaining Super Saiyan (full blooded Super Saiyan anyway...), and how they would abandon there war and come together to worship him as somekind of great god, a god of might, a god of power...

"A Purple Cat!" Vegeta vocalized in momentum of the thought. But then he paused in confusion: for some reason, his mind unconsciously associated a purple cat with the phrase "god of destruction"; he shook the perplexing thought out of his head.

Anyway, yes he would have his full power back, and then he would show these humans what real power is. Of course, the Saiyan found another thought popping in his head: what if, somehow, the massive amount of ki irradiating from his Super Saiyan form would rear an adverse effect on these benders? Perhaps his ki would actually have a special quality that would amplify their control over the elements to unbelievable proportions, giving the indigenous people a level of power they were not ready to have or never even meant to comprehend, thus contaminating the world with his very presence and throwing the entire civilization out of balance, resulting in the people converting into a xenophobic warrior race and eventually evolving into the universe's next celestial conqueror's?

He allowed the gravity of that thought to echo in his mind for a moment...

"naahhhh..." he shrugged it off; like he even cared what happens to the universe that far into the future...

"Hey, Vegeta!"

Another mental grunt from the Saiyan: you know, one would've thought the prince would ceased to hear those words in that giddy tone with both Nappa and Kakarot having been blown to bits, but since the aforementioned little Nemekian clearly didn't like Vegeta very much, now he had an overly affectionate teenage girl to greet him with those very choice words, along with the other stupid kids; hell, even Sokka had a big smile on his face (looks like he got his bag...)

"What is it, space peasants?" Vegeta groaned as he stretched; honestly, he never thought that the goth would end up giving him better company...

"You're not gonna believe what we found down in Goaling...!" Aang beamed.

"If it doesn't have anything thing to do with someone named Yangchen, I'm nowhere near interested..." he replied immediately, having the feeling this was going to lead into another cloth-stealing deboggle. Honestly, though, he was inclined to believe ANYTHING at this point...

Sokka's new-found smile persisted."Well, it just so happens that while we were shopping for my new bag..." he patted the thing with contentment,"we found out that this place is holding an underground tournament tonight - the greatest champions in the world are coming together for an earthshaking brawl..." he cited as if he were making an online endorsement.

"riight, this world anyway..." Vegeta rolled his eyes, "And I care because...?" Vegeta vocalized.

"Well," Aang began,"Originally, we were going to go there and look for my earthbending teacher, but then Sokka had this great idea...!"

"What? bet on on the champion of choice and use airbending to cheat? Pretty sure they'd see you hanged for that..." the Saiyan mused, tempted to smile from the thought.

"Actually, it's funny you mentioned the 'champion of choice...'" Sokka noted,"See, I just figured that, if Aang was going to find a strong enough master, well, he'd have to be able to beat a super-strong warrior like you."

At this, Vegeta spat his drink(yes he was drinking something - what is was is up to you...seriously, leave it in the reviews on what you would've wanted Vegeta to be drinking)."I knew you were up to something, you dweeb of a male - you expect me to sign up for some tournament? I don't have the time for such nonsense: I must find the answer to this mystery that befalls me!" he re-re-resoluted for, like, the fithe time.

"Oh, come on, Vegeta..." Katara encouraged,"I thought you were a great fighter and stuff; wouldn't you enjoy something like this?"

"N.O." was his response, jutting his finger at the Avatar,"You want me to fight on your behalf," then he pointed to the waterbender,"You want me to take my shirt off in public again..." then finally to the teen,"and you just want to see me get the Krillin beaten out of me while you sit back and eat popcorn," he said,"I am not going to cater to your needs while you do nothing to help me with my own problems..." he finished, turning around and pouring another glass of his mystery drink.

"I don't know what this 'popcorn' is, but it reminds me of fireflakes..." Mai lamented.

Sokka shrugged."I just thought it'd be a good exercise for you is all. Buut if you really think a guy like you wouldn't stand a chance against those other guys - I mean, don't get wrong, they are greatest earthbenders in the world, I don't blame you..."

Before he could start to down the drink, the prince immediately put in down on a rock and spun back to Sokka."Now hold on minute! I never said I was in any way afraid of those champions you spoke of! I just don't feel like wasting the effort..."

Sokka's smirked increased."oh, I'm sure that's what you meant; it's just the way you've been mentioning that one guy - ya know, the one that was always a step ahead of you - that I'm starting to think you might lose your touch if you don't get a good fight soon..."

His grip on the cup tightened."That's fine of you...but I'm...not...interested..." Vegeta emphasized.

Sokka shook his hands."No, no, really, I trust you when you say you're not afraid; I just thought, as a the great space warrior we know you to undeniably be, your reputation might get a little tainted once word gets out that the Prince of Saiyans backed out of fighting a bunch of inferior earthbenders - I mean, what would Kakarot think?"

The area was silenced by the sound of a glass shattering betwixt Vegeta's fingers. He slowly stepped to Sokka, Who partially wished he had not uttered the foreign name.

Never the less, Vegeta seized the teen by the collar and raised him off his feet, glaring into his eyes with a flaming tenacity."You can tell Kakarot not to feel lonely, because he's about to get some company from Goaling!"

* * *

Yes, yes indeed, the Saiyan prince had been talked into going along with Sokka's idea, as he was currently in the line for registration for Earth Rumble VI. He knew this was a total waste of time, but he couldn't get over that weaklings suggestion that he was "losing his touch" - sure, his throne, his family, his race, his ki, but his touch!? He thought not! He'd show that punk what a real warrior he was with this tournament.

Unfortunately, by the time the Saiyan had reached the registration booth, the woman was walking away.

"HEY! Where do you think you're going!?" Vegeta demanded.

The woman, a robust female in her mid forties. turned back to Vegeta"Sorry, pal, all the slots've been taken."

At this, his eye widened in stupor."WHAT!?" He knew there was a reason he was the last in line!"You're not serious, are you!? Surely there's one opening just look on your list there!"

"I just did look it over, that's how I know; sorry, maybe this fall you can come back in time..."

"I don't have until fall - I need to enter NOW!" he growled furiously. He couldn't leave here, there's no way Sokka would believe him, and then the boy would never let it down!

The woman sighed."Look, maybe if you'd come yesterday and pay for a reserved slot like the the other guys, maybe you'd make it; but even then, they tend to pay months in advance..."

Hie brow raised." 'other guys'?"

"Yeah, those guys..." she gestured to a much smaller line of earthbenders to his immediate left; he watched as each one merely plucked a golden ticket out of a box and continued into the lobby.

Vegeta slapped his forehead."Look, there simply must be an opening somewhere!" he said desperately.

She tapped her chin."Well, It doesn't look like The Boulder's here yet; I suppose if he doesn't make it in time, you could take his spot..."

Before the Saiyan could fully embrace hi relief, he saw another Earth Kingdom man run up to the VIP booth.

"SON OF A..." Vegeta groaned "...You better not be The Boulder, or I'll kill you here and now!"

The befuddled scrawny man quickly raised a dismissive hand."Doh-uh, No, I'm not The Boulder; I've here to a deliver a message that he will not be able to participate in the competition."

"What for?" Asked the Saiyan.

The messenger rubbed the back of his hair."Well, to start...he's dead."

The room was so quiet, one could've been scared by a fart.

"Dead!?" the ticket lady repeated in shock.

"Dead!?" as did the VIP booth lady.

"DEAD!? !? !?" along with the VIP wrestlers.

The Hippo farted, scaring everyone.

"And exactly how did he die?" Vegeta queried, worried that he was lying so that The Boulder could make a more dramatic entrance.

"Well, I wasn't there, but I was informed by a man who was known to be a one of a few privately hired escorts for the Boulder; according to him, they were attacked in the middle of the night by some kind of giant insect, which presumably ate the Boulder. Either that, or a tall guy dress as a bug killed him - it was definitely one of the two. I'm delivering a message from the only survivor."

"Interesting...well, cruel universe: I supposed that leaves his slot open then?" the prince changed the subject.

The stunned ticket woman slowly nodded."Y-yeeaah, sure..." she shook it out of her head."Anyway, your going to need a name..."

"Right, haven't given that yet: it's Vegeta..."

"No, see I don't real name; I mean mean a name..."

"Is thing going to be another 'only one tree' word game again...?" he growled, his brow twitching.

"Well, what I mean is, each of these fighter always has their own stage name - a title that people will remember you by..."

"A title..." Thought Vegeta,"Does it have to be earth-related?"

She shrugged."Technically no, but it's a silent tradition; it does have to be original..."

He let that roll for a sec: he could just simply use "Super Saiyan" or "Prince of Saiyans" as his title, as obviously no one in the history of this world since his father could've possible used either of those; but then again, he had this odd feeling that if his name were to be too well known on this planet, some alien with a grudge for Saiyans will hear of it and reap revenge; in his current state, that would not be very good for him - he thought it best to settle for a more obscure title to curtail suspicion...

The prince snapped his fingers and smiled."I know just the one!"

* * *

After a quick workout in the exercise room, Vegeta was standing in the room to await his announcement.

According to the regulations, Vegeta was not permitted to wear armor, even though it was made of wood; he also figured Sokka would throw a hissy fit if his clothes were torn up again, so Vegeta grudgingly decided (once again) to remove his clothes, leaving him in his tight black space undies; though he could still wear his Rock Lee-esque white arm straps, so he wasn't naked in the worst places.

He had a smirk on his face, knowing that he was one of the first fighters on the list, taking the spot of the late Boulder, and his new nick name was sure to be a hit the with the crowd...

"ugh, Vegeta...?"

In his surprise, he turned to see the young Avatar walking up to him; strangely, his usual upbeat smile was replaced with a somber frown, the boy's eye seemed as though they did not want to make contact with Vegeta's.

"Something bothering you?" Vegeta asked against his better judgement.

He rubbed the back of his head."It...well...When the mayor of Chin Village said all those things about you-I mean, your people, and how they attacked the Earth Kingdom...you accepted it as truth even though we knew it wasn't: why did you do that?" he stared into the man's eyes in suspense.

This took Vegeta back a bit: he never expected such a profound question - at least by this boy's standards - to come out of his mouth of all people; he wasn't sure how to answer it...well, that was a lie, he knew precisely what the answer was. But should he answer?

He looked away."Listen, boy...can't we discuss this later? I'm preparing for combat here..." Vegeta deflected the query.

Aang blinked, and turned away in disappointment.

* * *

As Aang made his way back down the hall, he couldn't help but stop walking for a moment to think of that answer Vegeta gave him: it seems like he was always preparing for combat, like that was all he knew how to do well. Is that what all Saiyans were like?

"hey..."

A voice startled Aang, he turned to see someone he probably would not have noticed if he kept walking, leaning against the wall and checking her fingernails.

Aang's heartbeat caught up with him."umm...hey?"

"What's up, baldy? Didn't see you at the registration booth..." the little girl noted,"You planning on signing up for a rumble?"

The airbender could only blink at first."whuuuh, no...are you?" he felt like counter asking to ease the sheepishness off of him.

"Maybe, maybe not..." was the girl's response. She stood up and walked up to Aang."Name's Toph." she held her hand out for a shake.

He took the hand, which offered a surprisingly strong grip."I'm, umm...Kataang," he fibbed, somehow finding that name both convenient and inevitable.

"I can tell that's not your real name..." she said, taking Aang off guard."But It'll do for now. So, what're you here for?"

"I was just talking to a friend of mine; he's a fighter in the competition. What about you?"

"The same, more or less," Toph replied,"You look off for some reason - did that talk not go well?"

The Avatar sighed."I guess I'm just starting to really get to know him; and I'm not sure if he's the person I thought he was..."

"Yeah, well, it happens - it's probably the tournament fever gettin' to his head, it'll wear off when he loses."

"Maybe so," Aang considered, though he knew she was simply speculating,"but, as far as 'losing' is concerned, I don't think you know who you're talking about..." he added with a sheepish smile.

For some reason, that simply added to the length of the girl's smirk."Trust me, it doesn't matter who this guy is: he's going to lose."

* * *

Aang and Toph continued to the spot in the rock stand where Aang's friends sat.

"Hey, Aang, you sure took your time! Where were you!? I've been holding your seat this whole time!" Sokka complained over the cheering crowd.

"Oh yeah, because all those giant rocks couldn't wait to fly right onto it..." Mai deadpanned.

"You let Mai come to?" Aang blinked in confusion.

Sokka shrugged."It's not like we could've left her alone; besides, we get a discount for bringing in slaves..." he explained randomly."Who's your new friend by the way?"

Aang gestured to the girl."This is Toph: she says she's the Blind Bandit's niece."

Sokka blinked in surprise."Oh, well, nice to meet you..." he greeted as politely as he could.

The two took a seat on the stone ledge between the Water Tribe siblings. Aang was rather surprised to see the elated expression on Katara's face.

"Katara? Why are you smiling? I thought you hated this sort of thing..."

She pouted."I'm allowed to smile, aren't I, Aang?" she turned her attention back to the crowd."When's Vegeta coming out? I wanna see him win!"

Toph blinked."His names 'Vegeta'?" She tapped her shin."That name sounds familiar for some reason..."

Then came a loud thundering crash; his look at the ring to see a muscular, long haired man rise to his feet."WELCOME TO EARTH RUMBLE SIX!"

The crowd up-roared in reaction.

"I am your host! Xin Fu! The rules are simple: just knock the other guy out of the ring, and you win!"

"oooohhh, this is gonna be great!" Katara squealed."I think Vegeta's in the first round!"

Xin Fu chuckled mentally, that new guy, the spiky haired one, specifically asked him to announce him after his opponent, the Hippo, for full dramatic effect, and Fu knew everything about drama...

"Fresh off the bat, we've got an interesting match to start off! In one corner, we have a returning giant: The Big Bad Hippo!"

The crowd cheers as the dimwitted behemoth stomped up to the stage, bearing his signature four teeth.

"In the next corner, we have a quite unique opponent: turns out this one's a nonbender! And we all know how that goes...!"

The audience booed out of disappointment.

"Not to worry, ladies and gentlemen, this guy's so tough, the ability to bend would've been downright unfair for the rest of the contenders!" Xin Fu assured them, though he knew he was merely talking out of his finely sculpted ass."In the next corner we have a man who can rock the ground with his bare hands alone! In the next corner, I give you, the strong, fast, the tenacious, the relentless: The Mighty Ozaru!"

Toph blinked."What kinda' stupid name is that? He might as well call himself ' The Giant Monkey' ."

"Why did you have to put that image in my head?" Sokka lamented, feeling more emasculated than ever

Vegeta pridefully stomped on to the ring, strips of emerald light gleaming off of his well-oiled body. (a tad too oiled, actually...)

Though Katara didn't seem to mind the excessive use of oil; in fact, she had now acquired a new-found appreciation for the non-aquatic lipid.

"Okay, I'm not gonna lie, that is pretty hot..." Mai admitted.

All three of these caused the physically inferior Sokka and Aang to slump further down their seats.

"Hear me, Hippo!" Vegeta called, pointing his shiny finger at the giant."If you think your size is going to win you this day, you are sorely mistaken! The Mighty Ozaru is going to take this round in a landslide!"

"Hippo MAD!" the fat man bellowed in response.

With a yell, Vegeta dashed for the large man with superhuman speed, cutting the gap in mere seconds as he quickly rammed his fist into the man's enormous gut...which actually did nothing.

There was an awkward pause between Vegeta and the Hippo...

Vegeta gave a round of punches that rattled the man's giant belly but did nothing further, his grand blubber absorbing the blows like water. Hippo eventually got tired of this and pushed Vegeta on his back with one hand.

"Hippo SMASH!" the giant roared, using what Vegeta hoped was just earthbending to lift a huge slab of rock out of the ring ground and throwing it at the Saiyan, who flipped out of the way for it to smash onto the floor. Vegeta spin-kicked the man in his knee cap, causing him to fall halfway to the ground, bring his face level with the Saiyan's; Vegeta punched Hippo in the face and jaw consecutively before Hippo caught the next fist in his mouth. Hippo swung Vegeta by the jaw, launching him ten feet across the ring. Hippo began to jump up and down, each landing rocking the very ring itself, causing Vegeta to struggle to get to his feet. The Hippo charge Vegeta and rammed his forearm into Vegeta's face, knocking him to the ground once more.

"Oh no! He's gonna lose!" Aang worried.

"Yeeaah he is...!" Sokka reveled.

"Come one, Vegeta!" Katara called.

" 'Vegeta', that definitely sounds familiar..." Toph muttered.

This time, Hippo plant his foot on Vegeta's chest, hindering him from arising. From this stand point, the Hippo took moment to scan his opponent."Puny Ozaru..."

Vegeta smiled, and glared up at the fat man."And now, I shall have my fun...!" he said before ki blasting him in the eyes, forcing him off the Saiyan and allowing him to immediately jump up and roundhouse kick the Hippo in the jaw. In a Fist of the North Star kind of manner, Vegeta began to pummel the Hippo with a relentless stream of punches and kicks, all directed against his large belly, forcing him to gradually stumble backwards across the stage. As they neared the end, the Hippos belly, true to form, began to form a small fleshy crater as the fat was pushed apart by the blows, leaving a portion of skin with no blubber in to protect it. Vegeta quickly took advantage of this, by gunning his fist into the Hippos abdomen, causing the giant to double over in pain, enabling Vegeta to give him a black-flip kick to the jaw, knocking the Hippo off the Ring completely, out cold before he even hit the ground.

At this, the crowd happily exploded in awe of the victory.

Xin Fu in particular was stunned by the unexpected win."Duh, the Mighty Ozaru wins!" he lazily flung his hand in the prince's direction.

"YEAAAAAYYY!" Katara whaled in pure glee.

"He won...he won!?" Sokka couldn't believe what he saw.

Toph nodded."Well, I will admit, this Ozaru guy's got the moves; there's just something about his name that reminds me of something; I can't remember what it is..."

"Next, the Ozaru vs...Fire...Nation...MAN!"

Vegeta raised an eyebrow at his next opponent: a smaller but still fat man dress in a gold and black cape, yellow boots, and red brown trousers, waving a large Fire Nation flag for the booing audience to see.

"Well well, am I actually going to take on a firebender?" Vegeta wondered aloud, as the evidence was painfully obvious.

"Please rise for Fire Nation National Anthem!" Fire Nation Man announced, confusing Vegeta with his overly-thick Space-Russian accent.

Mai mechanically rose off her seat, her hand extended to the west.

Fire Nation Man knelt in the same fashion.

 _Fire Lord!_

 _My Flame Burns for thee!_

A split-second later, the flag staff in his hand was blown in half by a ki shot, startling him out of his song.

"I've had about enough singing, thank you!" Vegeta protested.

Fire Nation Man's jaw dropped."How DARE you interrupt me!" he rose to his feet."I know who you are! You are the Bad Fire Bender who terrorized New Ozai and attacked our beloved Princess Azula!"

"Princess? Yes. Beloved? No." Mai answered silently.

"Then why did you stand for the anthem?" Sokka inquired.

She shrugged."Years of boarding school; it's practically involuntary..."

"That's right, that was me!" Vegeta replied."And I hope your flame is burning even brighter now that you have something against me!"

"Taste my sand, heathen!" Fire Nation Man pulled back and launch a missile of sand at the Saiyan, which Vegeta blocked with both arms.

He had to spit some out and rub his eyes after that."Sandbending!? Is that all I get!?" he rolled his eyes; he couldn't have everything he wanted."Very well, Sandman, let's see what you've got!" he blasted two ki balls at Fire Nation Man; Fire Nation Man blocked them with sand that Fire Nation Man then launched at Vegeta, who rolled under the sand and shot some more ki at Fire Nation Man; Fire Nation Man spun to avoid the ki balls, using his momentum to hurl more sand at Vegeta, who matched the sand in mid air with another ki blast.

Vegeta and Fire Nation Man glared into eachother's eyes...

With two yells, they both charged for eachother, Vegeta cocked his fist while Fire Nation Man encased his in sand; they both nailed eachother in the face. They then began a fierce exchange of blows. The force of Fire Nation Man's sand packed punches were matched by the speed of Vegeta's blows; eventually, Vegeta's speed won, buffeting Fire Nation Man's face with punch after punch, a knee to the stomach, a swing to the temple, topped off by an uppercut that sent Fire Nation Man screaming off the ring.

"The Mighty Ozaru wins!"

The audience cheered even louder than before, including Katara.

Vegeta stretched his shoulder in triumph."hmhmhmhmhm, Now, who's next?"

* * *

"The Mighty Ozaru vs The Gopher!"

A line or earth snaked its way across the ring as a bald man with a strange headdress emerged like a shark; he lunged out of the ground and tackled the Saiyan. They both rolled along the ground before Vageta pinned the Gopher by his neck, and pulled his fist back to punch him sorry. The frightened Gopher sunk back into the ground before Vegeta's fist collided with just the stone, making a crack in the rock and forcing Vegeta to wag his hand in pain. He realized the Gohper was at the trick again, this time with a rock in hand. As the Gopker again launched himself at Vegeta, the prince spun around and kicked him in the stomach, making him fall to the floor in agony; Vegeta went to down and wrapped his limbs around the Gopher's leg UFC style; he twisted the leg to the point where a cracking noise could be heard, making the Gopher scream like a girl. Vegeta then got up and grabbed the Gopher's ankles; he spun around and around and around, faster and faster before finally letting go, sending the Gopher flying off the ring.

* * *

"The Mighty Ozaru vs the Gecko!"

Vegeta ducked out of the way of three spherical rocks and shot some ki blasts, but the Gecko weaved, rolled, and crawled out of the way. Eventually, the Gecko pounced and wrapped his limbs around Vegeta's upper half, somehow getting the Saiyan in a choke hold with just his right leg. Vegeta's response was to jump forward and hit the ground, letting the Gecko brake his fall. Vegeta got up and jumped thirty feet in the air, and slammed his elbow into the Gecko's back, putting him out for the count.

* * *

"The Mighty Ozaru vs the Wild Man!"

At first Vegeta had no idea where his opponent was, up until he heard a feral cry above him; he looked up to see said wild man flying down at him on a rope.

The Saiyan snorted, raising his hand and shoot the wire, snapping it and causing the wild man to sail over him and hit the ground. The rope landed before Vegeta's feet giving him an idea...

The Wild Man struggled to get up, right when a lasso suddenly fell around his neck; the stunned Wild Man turned to see the smirking Vegeta holding the other end of the rope with both hands.

The Wild Man shook his head rapidly.

"GET OVER HERE!" Vegeta commanded, yanking the wire with all his might and causing the Wild Man to fly toward his raised fist.

The Gaang had to look away from the bone breaking beating that echoed throughout the ring, then all was silent.

"Flawless Victory!" Xin Fu cried.

* * *

"OZARU! OZARU! OZARU!" the audience cheered endlessly. The audience didn't seem to care about his strange lightbending, but perhaps they saw it a reason to cheer harder.

Aang was clapping in excitement, even Sokka found himself cheering for him, Toph stroked her chin interested; Mai had downed her latest helping of earthflakes, And Katara had long torn off her tunic, waving it madly as she screamed like she was in a rock concert.

And at the center of all this praise was Vegeta, basking in to the fullest extent, laughing loudly and making various poses ( a few he even stole from the Ginyu Force).

Yes, this was it: the moment he had missed in the decades of his life, let alone his bout without his power. For once in what seemd like such a long time the people were recognizing him for his might, as even in his weak state we was CHAMPION!

"I AM THE EARTH KINGDOM'S CHAMPION!" He vocalized, the crowd roaring in agreement.

"Oh, hold on for a moment, Titan!" Xin Fu interjected, causing the Saiyan to look up at him."While it's hard to object after this show you put on, I'm afraid we all know what comes next...!" he began in an over exaggerated foreboding tone.

"OOOOOOOOOOOHHHH..." muttered the elated audience."BANDIT! BANDIT! BANDIT!"

The smirk in Toph's face returned."Oh sweet earthen glory, this is gonna be good..." she said, cracking her knuckles.

His smile deflating, the prince whipped his head to and fro to to see that the whole stadium was cheering for someone else?"What is this!? Who is this 'bandit' they speak of!?"

"Oh man, I forgot! I guess it's time for your uncle to come out now, huh Toph?" Aang recalled.

Sokka blinked."um, Toph, this uncle of yours isn't really 'blind', is he? I mean, it has to be some sort of alliteratory gimmick?"

The smirking Toph didn't answer, simply rising off the seat and stretching.

"He probably is..." Mai supposed.

"He probably is AGOIN' DOOOWWWN...!" Katara finished.

"My apology, Mister Ozaru, but if you wanna be the champ, ya gotta BEAT the champ!" Xin Fu announced to the Saiyan.

"Champ? Where is this champ!? I'll tear him apart!" Vegeta growled in self-projected fury."BANDIT! SHOW YOURSELF! ! !"

"Where is he? I don't see anyone in the entrance..." Sokka searched.

Toph was just about done stretching."Oh, don't worry...I'm ready to tangle..."

"You whahuh?"

"Ladies and gentlemen, the moment you've all been waiting for: The Mighty Ozaru vs...!"

Just then Toph used a column of earth to launch herself into the air and onto the other end of the ring.

"...The BLIND BANDIT! ! !"

"It's time to rumble!" Toph announced, stomping into a fighting stance.

The Avatar's eye threaten to fire out of his head." _SHE'S_ THE BLIND BANDIT!?"

Sokka's jaw hung low."...welp, you sure can make some friends, Aang..."

And for the first time in a while, Vegeta was compelled to do a trademark anime gawk at the discovery, with the important addition of his left eye squinting, his arms dangling."Hang on second: you mean to tell me the greatest champion in this tournament is a little blind girl?" the prince asked Xin Fu, who nodded. Normally, this sort of thing would throw the Saiyan into a fit of rage, but he was in so good a mood that he actually burst into laughter, again indicative of tough anime people."HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, a little GIRL is the champion!? What's that say about the rest of those guys I beat up!?"

"It's says you're such a wimp, you can't even take on real men, let alone a little girl!" Toph replied.

Vegeta rolled his eyes."How adorable, a comeback: have you just been defeating you opponents by annoying them out of the ring?"

"I'd rather be annoying than a wimp, wimp!" was Toph response.

The prince chuckled."I bet you think I'm going to hold back on you like everyone else, don't you? I kneed a six year old in the stomach once and I can tell you're about twice that age, so don't think I'll give you any mercy!" he warned, sinking ito his own fighting pose.

"Whatever you say, just sounds like you're so scared you're stalling the fight as long as possible; but hey, just my opinion. Bring on, Mighty Monkey!"

Vegeta twitched at the name, been called that by too many races all his life."So I'm a monkey, huh? That's I guess it's appropriate for me to go APE SHIT!" he roared, sprinting for the girl at high speed.

Toph never stopped smiling...

Vegeta's fist sailed for Toph's face...but missed.

"Wha?" breathed the Saiyan, as Toph's head was now leaning to the left, Vegeta's fist occupying the previous spot.

"Something the matter, monkey?" Toph teased.

"Not for long!"

Vegeta attempted another punch, which Toph also dodged. He then, swung another fist that Toph ducked under, a kick that Toph side-stepped, and an uppercut that Toph balked away from.

The Saiyan paused..."Okay, no..."

Vegeta shot a volley of fists and feet at the girl, who managed to avoid them as they passed.

Aang couldn't believe her speed! it was if she knew where they where coming from before they were thrown, like she was just...waiting for them...and listening...

"Oh boy..." something clicked in the boy's mind.

"How...are...YOU...DODGING...THIS!?" Vegeta yelled it frustration before swinging his shin for Toph's head; she almost instantly blocked it with a thin stone slab just centimeters from her face.

The shin and stone struggled for a moment...

Vegeta backflipped away from Toph, breathing heavily...

"Aw, come one, you're tired already? Man, they sure don't make Giant Monkeys like they used to..." Toph mocked, shaking her head.

"Just...getting...situated..." breathed Vegeta."How the hell are you so fast!?"

She shrugged."Well, aside from you yelling 'yah, hiyah' every time you throw a punch, and your moves being, like, uber-predictable, you might say I just got a good reaction time. Besides, no need to flatter yourself over your speed - it ain't like you can move at the speed of sound, ya know..." she cracked.

"She's just toying with me!" Vegeta realized. Unbelievable, never did Vegeta think he'd ever experience this again, being played with by a so-called stronger opponent - and a girl of all things! Well not this time, he will not be underestimating this one...!

The next thing Vegeta did was fire a ki blast from both hands. Toph was shocked for an instant, but blocked the blast with the stone slab just in time for it to impact on it.

The slab descended."What kinda weird bending is that, anyway?"

"That's for me to know and you eat it!" Vegeta shouted before launching a volley of ki balls at Toph, who brought up another slab to block them.

Vegeta strafed in a cirlce while maintaining his ki barrage with one hand in order to ger around the stone sheild; Toph mere pulled the slab to her left to mirror Vegeta's light missiles. Toph got tired of that and shove the slab straight for Vegeta, who leapt over the slab and flung a large ki ball with both hands, which Toph already matched with a big rock; they both collided in a mixture of explosion and dust.

The Gaang watched as ki balls and rocks flew across the arena; like watching two groups of catapults launching their artillery at eachother from a long distance.

"Commoooon, Vegeta, I believe in you!" Katara hope he heard him, pumping her fist upwards.

"Is it me or is that little girl actually holding her own against a crazy space warrior?" Mai just realized.

"Oh, come on, don't tell me YOU believe that nonsense too!" Sokka groaned.

"That's her..." Aang realized. He smiled "That's my new earthbending teacher!"

"TAKE THIS!" Vegeta yelled, shooting another large blast of ki at Toph, who once again blocked it.

"You are aware you're basically announcing you attacks before you do them whenever you say 'take this' or 'eat that', right?" Toph reminded, annoyed when things get too easy.

"DIE! DIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIIIEEE!" Vegeta persisted, shooting more and more ki at the girl; she managed to block every one. In fact, in an attempt to get a bit of a challenge out of it, she blocked groups of blasts at a time rather than one big block for all of them.

"Aww, forget this! If you can't do better than that, I'll just end this now!" Toph complain before stomping her foot, causing a column to launch Vegeta high into the air, hair tinglingly close to the edge of the diamond lamp in the ceiling, and tumbling down to the ring crotch first onto a column, coincidentally on the end in front of the Gaang: they all cringed.

"OOOOOOOH! That's what I call a LOW BLOW!" Xin Fu chuckling at his dad joke, despite not being a dad (or at least not knowing his actually is)

Vegeta fell to the ground, curled up like an armadillo, wheezing, tentatively holding his manhood.

"Sorry, didn't mean to do that!" Toph apologized, still mockingly.

His breath was like sucking in molasses threw a straw; he was expending all this valuable energy and it wasn't even hitting her! If he could just have a little more of his full power back, then _she_ would be the one on the floor!

Regardless of the pain, he rose to his feet."Incase you people have forgotten, this is a tournament! Shouldn't that kind of move be against the rules!?"

"Sorry, monkey, but _this_ tournament only has one rule: I win!" Toph announced before performing some more earthbending movements.

A bunch of stone rectangles sprung from the ground, surrounding Vegeta.

"You think this will hold me back!?" Vegeta yelled, punching one of the slabs, which caused it to spin around and smack him in the face, knocking him into a another slab that also spun and smacked him, setting off a chain reaction of spinning slabs that relentlessly hit him in the face.

"Oh no!" Aang exclaimed,"It's just like the spinning gates airbenders use to train! Quick, Vegeta! Stop moving against the gates! Float around them like a leaf in the wind! Be the leaf, Vegeta!"

Unfortunately, Vegeta couldn't hear Aang over the sound of the slabs smacking into his face, until he was eventually smacked out of the maze of spinning slabs, spinning to the ground drooling.

A small hand lightly slapped Vegeta's cheek; He woke up and groggily arose to see a genuinely concerned look on the blind girl's face."You sure you don't want a time out or something?"

The Saiyan sprung, looming over the girl, fist cocked."I'll tell you when I'm finished, you-!" he was cut off a slab that nailed him in the chin."-scrawny little-!" he was hit in the stomach with another slab."- snot-nose barefoot-!" he was hit by a slab from his left."-topknot wearing-!" then from his right."-shrill-voiced-!" another slab in the spleen."-obnoxious tiny-!" about eight slabs to the face."-stupid-faced..." then knocked back with a front slab, knocked forward with another slab, smashed between two slabs, and brought to the ground by a from above."WILL YOU STOP HITTING ME WITH SLABS!?"

"'mkay..." Toph agreed, than promptly lauched a collumn into his abs, sending him flying into a wall in the arena.

Vegeta arose just in time to see a volley of boulders raining upon him."...mother...

The Gaang simply could look at the stone-cold pummeling that was dished out on the Saiyan.

"Dang, overkill much?" Mai observed.

"He's getting the jelly beaten out of him!" Sokka gaped.

"And I thought my fight with the Fire Lord was gonna be bad!" Aang marveled.

"She keeps earthbending him in the dick! Why!? Why does she keep earthbending him in the dick!?" Katara clutched her head.

Finally, Toph, bashed Vegeta away with a slab, sending his bruised body rolling to the end of the ring where the Gaang sat.

"Whoops, another slab, sorry'bout that!" Toph apologized, this time with no sincerity whatsoever.

"NononononoNOO! What's happening!? She MUST be cheating!" Katara grumbled.

"Looks like your friend is spent; he might well walk off that ring." Mai noted.

"Oh no, we have do something! Sokka, do something!" Aang said randomly.

"What? What am I supposed to do? Fight for him?" he squealed, as that sho'ain't neva goh' happen.

"I dunno, yell something inspirational!" Aang suggested.

"Why would I do that? I'm the guy that wants him to lose, remember?"

"Yes, we remember..." Mai began "...and so will Vegeta, after he loses to a girl, and how you were the one who talked him into entering this tournament in the first place..."

Sokka gulped. He jumped up to the edge of the stands and screamed."Vegeta You have to beat this girl!"

"I...can't..." he exhaled.

"You have to! Because if you don't...because...um..." he paused. after a second a _ding_ went off in his head."Because if you don't beat her, then Kakarot will!"

Vegeta's eye shot wide open, as if being injected with pure adrenaline.

Toph shot a finishing rock for his face at extreme velocity, which Vegeta grabbed with one hand, crushing it.

Then, the Saiyan clenched his fist, and started yelling, powering up. A faint white arua appeared around the prince, as his yell intensified.

Toph paused for second. The vibrations given off from this person was astounding! It was unlike any bending move she'd ever encounter in her young life! And that yell...the Yell! The yell she'd been hearing on and off for like a week now, This was the one who was doing it all along!

The powered up Vegeta raised his hand at Toph."NOT SO LITTLE BANG ATTAAAAACK! ! !" A slightly larger Little Bang Attack ki burst out of Vegeta's hand, roaring across the ring and bathing the flabbergasted Toph in its intense light.

* * *

As Lao and Poppy sipped on their tea, they were disturbed by a small tremor; dust fell from the ceiling and sprinkle into their tea.

Lao frowned."Darn tremors..."

* * *

As the smoke cleared, Silence reigned... the audience, Xin Fu, and the Gaang peered into the smoke to see the results of the attack.

When it was gone, they could see that the end of the ring Toph was standing on had been completely blown away, a gigantic molten gap in the platform that spanned the width of the ring denoting the missing chunk.

Vegeta breath gentle,"did...Did I win...?" he mumbled.

Just then, Toph popped up through the ground behind Vegeta."Not so much..."

"WHA-!?" was all Vegeta could say as he spun around to face her, just in time for her to jutt out three thin earth columns that sent the prince flying across the ring and face-first into the wall on the otherside. He slipped off and fell to the ground, his limp body echoing throughout the stadium.

 **Darkness...**

* * *

"Vegeta..."

...

"Vegeta...!"

...

"Vege-oh for the love of-WAKE UP, JACKASS!"

Vegeta's eye shot open, he sprawled up to a sitting position."WHA-WHAT HAPPENED!?"

He whipped around in all directions: he was in his sleeping bag back at the clearing where they landed earlier, the Gaang sitting around him."Wha...I..It was all a dream?" Vegeta began to laugh out loud."HAHAHAHAH! It was all a dream!"

"yeaah, This 'dream' you had? Did it have anything t do with fighting a little blind girl?" Sokka asked nervously.

Vegeta paused."... ... ...It wasn't a dream, was it...?"

"There's good news..." Katara began..."

The prince rubbed his sinus."Don't tell me: Kakarot defeated her?"

Aang rubbed the back of his head."Actually...I did."

* * *

"WHERE'S THE BANDIT!?" Vegeta thundered, pinning the teen to the wall.

"I DON"T KNOW! I SWEAR TO HEI BAI!"

"SWEAR TO ME! !" the prince yelled before punching the bully in the gut.

"Vegeta, stop it! You're gonna get us thrown in jail!" Sokka begged.

The very second Vegeta heard where the stupid children gathered the news of the tournament from, his immediate response was to drag Sokka all the way into town by his pony tail to guide him straight to the academy.

"I told you! the Bandit's a mystery: she shows up to fight and then she disappears!" The terrified student reassured Vegeta.

"You're not telling us everything!" Katara barked, having the other student in an ice-covered choke hold.

"That's all I know! No one knows who she really is...! Please don't kill me!" the teen begged, streams of tears leaking from his eyes.

"I think we're asking for the wrong person..." Aang realized."In my vision, I saw a girl with white dress and a pet flying boar: Know anyone like that?"

"Well, uh, I, the flying boar is the symbol of the Bei Fong family-"

"WHERE!?"Vegeta growled inhumanly.

"In a big mansion north of here! Ya can't miss it!"

"WHY!?" He asked again.

The boy blinked."duh-d-cause, ya' know, there-there rich and stuff-?"

"DO I LOOK LIKE A COP!?"

Vegeta then flung the teen backward, his head slamming into a clay pot. Turned and left the plaza.

Katara threw her victim to the floor, while giving him the "I'm watchin you" gesture, following Vegeta along with Aang and Sokka.

"I can't BELIEVE I lost to a blind girl! Me, the Prince of Saiyans, defeated by a HUMAN GIRL!" Vegeta yelled.

"Don't worry, Vegeta, she had to've been cheating!" Katara defended vehemently.

"How do you figure that? You can't just fake earthbending!" Sokka said.

"Aang did for me! So...maybe someone airbended for her!"

At this, the teen's upper half hung forward."Katara, please, why do you insist on bringing shame upon our family?" Sokka drooped.

"I don't care where that bending came from! Both her and possibly the secret help are going to pay with their lives!" Vegeta reminded. He felt his forehead."Gah, my brain is still throbbing! I can't even remember what made me enter that tournament in the first place!"

"Oh, thank Hei Bei!" Sokka breathed in relief.

"Don't rough her up too bad, Vegeta: She's fated to be my earthbending teacher ya know..." Aang reminded.

"If she can teach without her eyes, she can teach without the rest of her body..." replied the Saiyan.

"There's the flying boar!" Aang announced as he pointed to an image of a winged boar from their vantage point.

They beheld a huge beautiful mansion surrounded by a vast yard and a huge stone wall, with the symbol above the gateway, flanked by a pair of guards.

"I'm going in..." Vegeta announced, arise from the hillside.

Sokka pulled him back down."What're you doing!?"

"Take your hand off me, worm!" the Saiyan shoved Sokka off.

The teen rubbed his temples."Look, I know you're still mad about the fight, but we're talking about Aang's earthbending master, okay? Can we at least just get in there quietly without the guards noticing!?" he yell/whispered.

Angry as he was, Vegeta saw his point, 'specially considering the last time he tried to get past a couple guards; he spent an awful lot of ki during that fight, which was recently slow to recover."Fine, lead the way..."

* * *

They slid down a wall on the right of the estate and sped across the field and behind a large bush.

They peered sneakily around the bush.

"Alright, here's the plan..." started Vegeta,"Sokka and the Avatar kill of the guards while me and Katara storm the mansion."

"Sounds like a good plan," the waterbender agreed, her mind exploding from the sound of Vegeta calling her by name.

Sokka slowly inhaled and exhaled." _oooor_ , we could _all_ sneak into the mansion and have a nice calm conversation with the Blind Bandit who is, once again, fated to be Aang earthbending master..." he suggested.

"As I said before: you stick to your own objectives, while I tend to mine..." the Saiyan replied. He knew full well how much Yangchen time he was wasting, but it would all be worth it after he put that loudmouth brat in her place...

Just then, the ground below them erupted outward, launching the four into the air and landing somewhere else, Katara and Aang atop a couple bushes, while Vegeta and Sokka flat on the ground.

On his back, Vegeta reopened his eyes to see the Blind Bandit hanging over him. She smirked."How's it hangin, monkey boy?"

"YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SH-!" Vegeta shot up and pulled back his fist before Sokka wrapped his arms around Vegeta's; thanks to his further depleted ki, Sokka managed to hold him off.

"What're you doin here, Kataang?" Toph asked, as the two continued to wrestle.

"Um, that's the thing, Toph..." Aang began.

"If that's your real name, cheater!" Katara pointed an accusing finger at the blind girl.

Aang sweatdropped."um...anyway, See, my real name is Aang, and I'm actually the Avatar, and I wanted you teach me earthbending."

At this, Toph's eye-lids raised."...that...was actually the truth..." she noted. Her brow regressed."Still not my problem. Now get out before I call the guards!" she warned.

Vegeta elbowed Sokka in the side,("OWmykidney..!" yelped Sokka) picked him up and threw him into the hedge behind them."Oh, well, that's a shame, I guess she's not going to train you after all...!" he began, stomping over to Toph."Now I believe you owe be some retribution..."

Toph gave a flat expression, then it morphed into one of fear."Guards! Guards! Help!" she called in weak pitiful tone.

"Nice try, Bei Fong, but I'm not going anywhere!" Vegeta declared, right before the tattered leaf-covered Sokka angrily swung his foot up Vegeta's dick from behind, pulling the immobilized Saiyan away with him.

From his hiding place nehind the bush, Sokka watched the guards run up to Toph; they asked what was wrong, but she said she only heard something and got scared; the guards corrected her for walking around the garden alone.

Vegeta groaned in pain."uhggg...stupid girl must've bent a up a rock into my dick when I wasn't looking..."

"Duh, yeah sure, that's what happened..." Sokka took advantage of, re-realizing he could not hold him off like this once he regains that lightbending power.

Katara raised an eyebrow."That's wasn't her, it was-"

Sokka quickly covered her mouth."Nahnahnah, we need to let him recover...!"

As the guards escorted Toph by the hand back into the house, Aang stealthily landed next to the team.

"I just got the perfect idea to get past the guards!"

"What? Ask them to let you pass?" Vegeta cracked.

Aang smiled shrewdly."Yes."

* * *

Evidently, the group had just plain forgot one of them was this world's messiah, and that merely asking the Earth Kingdom guards to enter was no different from a god asking for a free hot dog.

It was told them that Lao Bei Fong, Toph's father, had obviously been informed and had immediately ordered for a great meal to be set of in the dinning room.

Vegeta was legitimately surprised to see that the banquet was virtually finished by the time they walked into the room (he forgot how money can make time speed up).

Lao Bei Fong walked up the Avatar and bowed."My goodness, it is such an honor!"

"Oh no, the honor's mine!" Aang bowed back.

"Come, take a seat." Lao led them to the right end of the table.

Of course before Vegeta sat down, he noticed three people at the end of the table. On the left was a middle aged scrawny man with long hair and a white and green robe, who greet Vegeta with a casual wave of the hand; to the left of that man was a younger woman in a beige robe large poofy hair that disturbingly reminded him of Mrs. Briefs, and like Mrs. Briefs, she gave Vegeta a rather provocative glare as she stroked the surface of her tea with her spoon; and to her right was sitting his latest nemesis: the Blind Bandit herself. She smirked and subtly bucked her chin up as a greeting.

Vegeta's eye's squinted slightly, his lips tightened, his fist clenched; he quickly took the seat Aang was about to take, wrapping the napkin around his neck slowly and taking a bowl of bean pudding and sticking his spoon into it, all the while watching the girl like a hawk.

But before he could put the spoon in his mouth...

"Pardon me, Mr. Vegeta is it?" Lao began.

"Yes, it's Vegeta - Prince Vegeta." he responded naturally.

"mmmm, A prince..." Mrs. Bei Fong mused.

"It's a family custom to pray at the table before eating, if you don't mind of course...?" The man explained politely.

"Oh, of course..." Aang nodded as he and Katara knelt hand held their hands together, awaiting said prayer.

"In fact, I do mind," replied the Saiyan."The Prince of Saiyans caters to no man or deity."

" _Vgta_..." Sokka grunted, brandishing his club.

The prince rolled his eyes."Fine, go ahead and pray..." he consigned, getting into the usual Frieza saluting position and closing his eyes, as that was the only reverent gesture he was familiar with. Honestly, how could this man see a necessity for religion with all this money? Of course, given the vast wealth, he was probably going to pray to himself...

"Oh, great and mighty Vetega..." the Saiyan's right eye _boinked_ open and after a second creaked in Lao's direction," we thank you once again for saving the Earth Kingdom from the unearthly evils of the past so that we may live to take part in this wonderful wonderful banquet we have set up in gratitude of your deeds - as it has been, as it is..."

"As it is" Toph, Poppy, and Master Yu echoed.

As they began their feast, Vegeta stared at the rich man in bewilderment. Was it just him, or did the name of that god he was praying to sound an awful lot like the _female equivalent_ of his own name?

He shook his head, it was probably a coincidence (everyone in the universe seems to speak the same language, for Freiza's sake); and if it were important, it'd likely be brought up somewhere else...Better to focus on one source of anxiety at a time. In this case, **her...**

He lipped to the girl "Your mine..."

Toph managed to sense the gesture, and lipped "Come at me, bro..." in response, making the spoon warp in Vegeta's fingers (that is, Vegeta bent the the spoon with his fingers; sorry, LOK fans, no metalbending just yet)

Vegeta turned his eyes back and forth to see Lao and Aang discussing his destiny to defeat the Fire Lord and save the world like it were just stocks and bonds to them; suddenly an invisible force shocked his chair, making him lurch forward and yelp, gaining everyone's attention. Vegeta turned back to Toph to see her smirk then return to her soup like nothing happened. His cheeks flexed at the realization. She was actually taunting him, in front of everyone! But he had to keep it together, just a little longer after this dinner, maybe until tonight when his power would recharge further, then he would have his revenge.

Just then, he felt a bizarre sensation prodding his leg; turned over a little to see his lap being patted by a floating pebble; his face whipped back at Toph, who had her left hand under the table, and was likely controlling the small piece of earth to agitate him further, which was totally working.

 _"She doesn't fear me at, all does she? Not even Freiza was this cavalier around Saiyans! Oh how she will rue the day she messed with me! RUE IT! ! !"_

It was then that the blind girl did the exact opposite of ruing by making another shock that somehow caused Vegeta face to whiplash into his bowl of bean pudding, causing everyone to stare at the Saiyan like he was batshit crazy.

Vegeta slowly place his hands on the table to push himself back up, revealing a pudding covered face flushed with rage, his fingers digging into the stone table.

Noting the tense air, Mrs Bei Fong decided to step in."Well...shall we move to the living room for dessert then...?"

The room temperature dropped as an eerie chuckled spewed from Vegeta's throat.

"Yes...dessert...do you want to know what my faaaavorite dessert is, Mrs. Bei Fong...?" Vegeta asked venomously, rising from the table.

"Oh no..." Sokka moped.

"Do tell..." Mrs. Bei Fong encouraged, thinking this conversation was going a whole different direction.

The Saiyan's eye's narrowed as he continued "...A churro..."

An awkward pause ensued, but the tension vastly deflated...

Vegeta then leapt on top of the table."AS I SIT AMONG THE MUTILATED CORPSES OF MY ENEMIES! ! !"

His voice sent echoes of shock throughout the room; for a second no one could even breath; even Toph didn't see that coming...

Just then, Mrs. Bei Fong broke the silence."You too?" she smiled.

At this one, the Saiyan's lips lowered."What the f-OH TO HELL WITH THIS...!" he cried before charging a ki ball in Toph's face.

The yelping Toph sunk beneath the ground as the ki went through the rest of the chair, shocking Mrs. Bei Fong.

Lao, Sokka, and Yu shrieked at this."TOPH! !"

Toph popped out behind where she was sitting and took a battle stance."Okay, spiky, I tried to be friendly, but if you insist...!"

Suddenly, Yu slid in font of Toph and took a stance of his own."Do not worry, mistress Toph, I will protect-!"

"NOTHING!" Vegeta said as he seized Yu's collar and threw his head into the ceiling, his head stuck. Vegeta lunged at Toph with his fist which was blocked by a slab; Vegeta weaved around the slab and threw a punch that Toph ducked under, bending the slab into his jaw and making him spin in the air and onto Sokka's soup.

"VEGETA WHAT'RE Y-!"

"MEAT SHIELD!" Vegeta announced before seizing Sokka up and using his body to block multiple incoming rocks from Toph in the abs, chest and forehead. The Saiyan hurled Sokka straight at Toph, who raised a tall slab that bent over in order to safely catch Sokka, only to fling him back at Vegeta like a calapult; Vegeta round house kicked Sokka flying into the door making his upper half go through it.

With a yell, Vegeta leapt in the air and swung his heel down on Toph, who again dodged as the heel smashed a small crater into the ground, and jutted another column that launched Vegeta into the wall behind Lao (blowing his hair) and making the stone crack.

Vegeta plopped to his knee and got back up, charging Toph before four slabs of stone surrounded the Saiyan."What the!? Oh hell no! Not this again!"

It actually came from four earthbending guards who arrived just in time."Don't worry, sir, we have the culprit neutralized!" one said.

"Yeah, we kinda heard some yelling, and saw Master Yu's head come up through the floor upstairs, and we put two and two together..." another explained.

"How DARE you! This is my fight!" Vegeta's muffled voice objected.

"Who is this madman!? He will pay for this!" Lao announced.

Aang landed infront of Lao."No! Just listen! You're daughter is more than you think she is! She and Vegeta dueled eachother last night and she beat him with no effort! She's amazing!"

"That's the most insane thing I've ever heard of!" Lao responded.

"It IS, because she cheated!" Katara butted in."I'll bet it was her master that was helping her!"

"I don't care how she was involved: anyone who dares to attack my Toph won't even see a death sentence! I will personally sever his head!" Lao replied.

At this, his wife hummed."mmm, You'd do that won't you, you _dark_ bloody maniac, you...?" she teased her husband, which actually made him smile from approval.

Aang only stared at Lao with a 'what's with her?' expression for an explanation.

Lao, shrugged."Omashu women; you know how they are..."

Suddenly, the slab around Vegeta sunk to the floor again, and the guards were catapulted into the door with Sokka.

All eyes turned to Toph, who shrugged her teeny shoulders."Sorry, Dad, but now that the catdog's out of the bag, It's on, Ozaru!"

The Saiyan was taken back by the convenience, but then chuckled."What a shame: the only reasonable human in the room is the one to die!"

"The only 'dying' that's happening here is me dying the back yard with your FACE!" Toph announced before launching the dinner table to the other end of the room. She summoned a hail of rocks up from the ground; and then made them envelope her body tightly from head to toe, creating a set of stone armor with enlarged stone gauntlets.

Vegeta tore his (Sokka's) tunic off and and powered up slightly.

 ***cue One Punch Man Battle music***

The two dashed for eachother; Vegeta tackled Toph in midair, sending them both crashing though the stone wall right of the door Sokka and the other guards were stuck in; they watched the two tumble into the hallway. They both jumped to their feet and swung both fist at eachother, stone gauntlets colliding with strapped gauntlets, their fist struggling for a moment. Vegeta thrusted his other fist at Toph's abs, only for Toph to weave to the side and pin the fist between her stone hand and his midsection; she uppercutted Vegeta's chin with her other fist; Vegeta punt kicked Toph in the face, grabbed her left leg with both hands, spun around and sling shotted Toph down the hallway. As Toph broke her momentum by cleaving her stone fingers into the ground, Vegeta cupped his hands together.

"GALLICK GUN!"

The hallway was lit with an intense purple hew as a thick beam of ki roared straight for Toph, who brought up a slab of stone for extra protection; a wise decision as the beam collided with so much for that it pushed the slab at Toph, who forced both rock fist into the slab, adding her own bending strength to fend off the purple beam; both the slab and the armored Toph slid down the hallway, eventually getting pressed against the wall at the end, making a Toph-sized imression, when the beam finally subsided.

Toph allowed the slab to fall away from her, thudding to the floor."Oh, I'm sorry, were you finished? Cause I could've held on way longer..."

"HOLD THIS, BITCH!" The Saiyan thundered as he glided down the hallway, his fist cocked and his body bursting with an aura of blue ki. The punch forced them both through the wall and into Lao's library.

"My library!" Lao lamented.

Toph gaurded against a volley of ki balls from Vegeta, but the blows were reaping cracks in her armor. The girsl sighed."Sorry, Dad..." she swung her left fist to the right, tipping the gigantic stone book shelf to Vegeta's right over; she slid out of the way before it came crashing down on the prince, the shelf splitting into pieces and destroying years worth of scholarships in one fell swoop.

The Blind Bandit took a breather, thankful for the swift end to the battle...before another set of vibrations gained her attention. A blue ki beam vertically burst from the stone, a very angry Saiyan rising to his feet.

"What the-Hey! What's with you!? Stop not losing!" Toph complained, never having to deal with an opponent this long before.

"Only after you stop LIVING!" Vegeta replied, powering up again and dashing for Toph, who countered by dipping to the side and grabbing Vegeta swung fist, using his momentum to launch him into and though the stone wall behind her.

As the two disappeared in the destruction, the sounds of battle echoing on, the rest of the company could only stand in the hall way, gaping at the ruin of the house.

Sokka (successfully removed from the door with only a few cuts and scratches) blinked twice."Um...is it just me...or Vegeta getting stronger...?"

Aang and Katara shared equally shocked looks."His bending is coming back..." Aang said.

"I'm sorry? doesn't he already have his bending?" Lao quired."Whatever bending it's supposed to be..."

"No," Katara paused."He means back back, as in making mountains disappear back..."

The armored Toph and glowing Vegeta burst out side the west wall on the mansion, rolling across the grass and flipping to their feet to exchange another hyper-fast set of blows.

"DADADADADADADADADADADADADADADADADA!" Vegeta cried as he continued punched and kicking

"Will you stop making those stupid noises!?" Toph demanded before she rock head-butted Vegeta in the dick and slid fifteen feet from him; Toph unhinged the rock armor from her body to relieve herself of the added stress, and bent two beach ball-sized boulders out of the ground and hurled them at the stunned Saiyan, who managed to duck under the first and catch the second, but before her could throw it back he was crushed under a tank-sized boulder; Toph lifted it off of Vegeta, who struggled to get up, before Toph swung the boulder into Vegeta's side, launching him down the yard like an angry muscular golf ball; he toppled though various trees and statues before rolling to a halt.

The company ran out of the hole just in time to see Toph launch her self in the air along with the boulder; with a yell, she slammed the boulder back down on Vegeta, the grass rippling from the force.

"My goodness! Toph's going to kill him!" Mrs Bei Fong cried.

"Somehow, I don't think that's going to be possible for long..." Sokka responded forebodingly.

Toph landed on the ground with an earthshockwave, and lifted the boulder off of Vegeta just to slam it back down on him, then she did it again, and again, and again, every time Vegeta let out a grunt of pain, which became more faint over time; once Vegeta stopped making any sounds, Toph slammed the boulder back on him on more time...then slammed it on him again for good measure.

The blind girl heaved breaths out of her mouth, wiping the sweat of her exhausted forehead with the sleeve of her once beautiful and priceless but now dirty and tattered white dress."uuugghhh finally...thought he had me there for the sec..." she lamented, turning around and walking back for the house.

Needless to say, the company stared at the girl with open mouths that varied in length, albeit for mixed reasons.

"She...beat him...?" Katara whimpered.

"I had no idea she was capable of this..." Mrs. Bei Fong admitted.

"She...I don't believe it..." Lao mumbled.

"Whew...I'll admit, you guys have some friend; too bad he's never gonna walk again after that - alas, he forced my hand..." Toph shook her head as she walked up to her friends and family, stretching.

"Welp', that settles it: Aang, meet your new earthbending master," Sokka announced flatly; Aang weakly waved to Toph in response.

At the sound of this Lao instantly snapped to attention."What!? That's absolutely out of the question!"

Sokka groaned."Oh come on, man, did you not see what your offspring just did? She's a master among masters!"

"No, she's an unruly wild animal!" Lao objected." I cannot believe you hid this side of you from me, Toph! You've have deceived me and this entire household for I don't know how long!"

Just then, a strange moaning sound caught Toph attention.

"Well what did you expect her to be like?" Aang inquired."As far as I can tell, you've tried to lock her up in this house her whole life! People don't even know you _have_ a daughter!"

That groaning turned out to be an elongated growl that slowly grew in volume...

"And with good reason!" Lao justified."This is my daughter we're talking about! She's blind and fragile! And now apparently she's gone totally insane!"

"Yeah sure, if you define 'insane' as 'unbeatable bending champion'!" retorted Sokka." You've actually wronged the world for not allowing her to take on the Fire Nation! I don't even know why we're wasting our time training Aang, she could beat the Fire Lord on her own!"

That growl morphed into a yell.

"Honey, don't you think you're being a bit obtuse?" Mrs Bei Fong asked."Our daughter is quite clearly capable of handling herself; I don't even think Yu has any more teach her..."

"Have you gone mad on me too, Poppy!?" Lao defended."You say I haven't given Toph enough freedom, but it is evident to that she's received far too much! From now on, Toph will be guarded and cared for twenty four hours a day! We're doing this for her own good!"

Just then, the boulder was blown to bits by a vertical burst of golden energy, the city resonating with a loud enraged scream; a gust of wind cased trees to bent away, leaves and grass to fly in all directions, a few windows of the mansion cracked and some shattered, all eyes focused on the shimmering yellow aurora on the other end of the yard.

Within it was a very very angry Vegeta, his breath slow, veins pulsating all of over his upper body, his muscles crackled with brief yellow sparks of electricity, his teal pupils honed in on his target, but what stood apart from it all, was his new head of brilliantly glowing golden head of hair.

The group were struck breathless at the sight of the form, but not as much as Lao Bei Fong.

"Impossible..." he thought,"He...that hair...it makes him look so much like..."

Toph groaned in frustration."Aww. come one, man, how many times do I have to kick the same butt!?" she gathered a another hail of rocks into another set of stone armor; she pulled back to charge, but in a flash of gold, a glowing hand was clamped around her cocked stone fist.

The group almost stumbled over to see Vegeta now standing before them, his back to them, his eyes boring down in the girl like an owl, his hand gripping the rock fist.

"w-what...?" Toph muttered in confusion, out of disbelief that someone had managed to outrun her seismic sense.

"I'm going...to crunch you..." the Super Saiyan growled inhumanly.

"...w...what...?" Was all Toph could say before Vegeta grip tightened, making her body lurch in pain, spreading cracks around the stone wrist.

"...like a Vlossic pickle..."

In the next instance, Vegeta swung his fist into the armored Toph's face, sending the girl screaming into the air. The Super Saiyan blasted off after her, blowing the group off their feet.

Toph spiraled through the air, screaming helplessly, her only thought being "What!?"

Vegeta intercepted, flying parrel to the tumbling rock armor; his sent another superpunch to the face, launching her screaming in the other direction, he blasted off after her once more.

The petrified Toph quickly reformed her armor into a rock sphere to better shield herself from the next attack, which proved wise, as the Super Saiyan kicked the boulder into higher into the air, soaring after it and punching it in a different direction; Vegeta continued the cycle of punching the buolder in various directions, intercepting it, and striking it somewhere else; citizens below looked up in surprise to see a golden streak of light rapidly dart across the sky, ramming into a dark blur relentlessly.

Sokka's jaw threaten to snap off."Okay! Last time I checked, only AANG could do those crazy glowed-up frenzies!"

"I see it now..." Aang muttered."This is Vegeta's true power!"

"Still don't think he's an alien, Sokka?" Katara managed to remind.

The boulder containing the screaming Toph flew helplessly higher into the sky, only for Vegeta to appear above it, clasp his fists together, and with a yell, bashed the boulder downward, making it plummet down for the city if Gaoling like a meteor.

The boulder slammed through a small bridge, splattering water and debris all over the street and people.

Another impact resulted from the Super Saiyan crashing foo and fist first onto the ground in front of the boulder.

"What's the matter, Blind Bandit!? You were doing SOOO well a second ago! Come on! Come outta there and kick my ass like before!" the prince (so blinded by rage that he didn't even notice that he had transformed) grilled the girl, before his dashed forth, and punched the boulder into the edge of the made man river, sending it rolling into the air above the streets before Vegeta punched it into the nearest building, citizens fleeing in terror from the spectacle.

"We have to do something! Vegeta's gonna kill her if he doesn't stop!" Sokka voice out.

"How?" Katara asked.

Sokka flung up a finger to elaborate, but that that he in fact could not.

Multiple rooftops were split apart as the screaming boulder plowed through them in the wake of Vegeta's furious strikes.

"SOME...BODY...MAKE...IT...STOOOOOP! ! !" Toph pleaded with each strike.

Unfortunately, Vegeta heard that."I'll make it stop alright, you blind piece of crap!" he announced before swinging his foot into the boulder so hard that it flew clear out of city limits.

* * *

Mai was just minding her own business filing her nails with her knife before a screaming boulder whooshed passed her head, blowing her hair, followed by a screaming gold streak; after a thunderous thud, the same screaming boulder whizzed by her in the opposite direction, followed by the yelling streak.

* * *

Back into the city, the boulder flew int a large market, crashing though the ceiling and plowing through any shelves and item in the way, ending in a crater that destroyed part of the meat deli, as well as some of the meat itself.

As people fled, the golden aura of the manic Super Saiyan blew dirt and debris aside as he landed before the boulder.

"I think it's about time I cracked open this pistachio...!" Vegeta announced before hover over the rock and angling himself so that his next strike would not send the boulder flying again, delivering a vicious volley of punches and kicks upon the boulder, spreading cracks all over it, rattling the whole thing and the person inside.

As he continued, Aang glided through the hole Vegeta made, landing behind the Super Saiyan.

"VEGETA! You need to stop this! You proved your point; you're stronger than Toph!" the Avatar begged.

"SHUT UP, GHOST OF NAPPA! !" Vegeta exclaimed irrationally, blasting a beam of yellow ki in Aang direction; it barely missed, but the explosion behind him was enough to blow Aang off his feet.

With Nappa dealt with, Vegeta gave the boulder one good elbow on the top, making a clarge crack that spread evenly around the whole boulder, splitting it in two and revealing the petrified Toph.

The girl crawled on her back away from the advancing Super Saiyan."Okay, I admit it! I'm sorry, you're the champion! I'm a loser and I'm sorry I ever challenged you! I promise I'll never fight you again, Just don't kill me alright!?"

Vegeta chuckled evilly."Oh, I can assure you, Bei Fong, you'll never be fighting anything when I'm through with you...!"

Vegeta raised his hand up to the girl's face, glowing a blue ball in his palm, preparing for a true Big Bang Attack."...unless of course you plan on contending IN HELL ! ! !"

The manager of the market skidded to a hault, gawking at the sight of the Super Saiyan."WHAT IN SPIRIT'S NAME OF GOING ON!?"

"I dunno, sir...!" the wimpy clerk to his right began,"...but that yellow-haired guy's about to vaporize that little girl!"

At the sound of this, Vegeta's ki ball dissipated.

The clerk practically soiled himself, realizing the man heard him.

Vegeta turned and looked at him."What did you just say?"

The manager gulped."He...He said that you were about to vaporize that girl there-"

"No! No! I mean before that!" Vegeta corrected.

The clerk stammered."w-well, my bossed walked in and-"

"NO! Damnit I mean my hair - what did you just say about my hair!?" Vegeta elaborated.

"th-that...it's yellow...?"

The prince blinked twice."yellow...?" he immediately noticed something he took for granted seconds before: both Toph and the general area around them were shaded in a faint golden light; he then looked at his hand, which he realized were covered in a hint of a gold aura; he also realized that for the last couple minutes, he'd been fighting as he normally would, flying through the air and bashing his opponent though things, which given his current predicament could only result from a sudden drastic increase in his power level...

"... ... ..I ...I'm... a super saiyan..." his golden bathed lips uttered as he stared into nothingness...

...after a long awkward pause, he exploded once again, not out of rage but of excitement."I'M A SUPER SAIIIIYAAAAN ! ! ! ! !" he screamed to the world, laughing and hopping up and down sporadically; he started making all sorts of poses and babbling victorious jargon to no one in particular. He then dashed up to Toph and picked her up by the midsection, swinging the terrified girl around merrily."THANK YOU! THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOOOOOUUUUUU! You gave me just the push I needed to bring me back! I'm BACK!, My powers are BAAAAACK! AAAAAAHAHAHHAHHAHAAAAHH!"

With that, Vegeta dashed up through the ceiling, creating another hole, as he continues into the sky.

As he cheered, he began to twirl and looptyloop in the sky, using the golden streak to write "Vegeta" in the sky.

Master Yu, a large chunk of earth still around his neck, walked out of the building to see his client and their guests watching a cheering golden light criss cross across the sky, the area echoing with _"Weeeee! YEAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHAAAAAA"_ and singing a few verses from _Dangerzone_.

His expression totally neutral, he calmly turn to Lao and asked."Could somebody tell me what the hell is happening?"

Sokka blinked."Well, given Vegeta's new mood, I'd say the Bei Fongs are officially childless..."

The middle-aged master simply huffed."Well, there goes a reliable source of income..."

"Riiiiiidiiiiin throuuuugh theeeeee DANGERZZZOOOOOOOONAAAAAAH!" he sung to the heavens before blasting off even higher into the sky, bolting through clouds, the wind brazing against his body, all the way up to a height only Appa could reach, where her slowed down, taking a moment to behold the sea of clouds composing his new perspective of the horizon.

"Beautiful..." He marveled, for the first time in a while appreciating the utter grandeur of the firmament. Then he pumped his fist into space and shouted with all him might. "SUPER VEGETA HAS RETUUUUURRRRRNED! ! ! ! ! ! "

* * *

Zuko yelped, shooting up from his sleeping position.

The prince rubbed his head: he had that that strange dream again in which he was some kind of bounty hunter with large poofy hair and a bizarre dialect. He wondered if the dream meant something, but he shook the thought away, not in the mood for pondering this only Uncle would dwell on...

Speaking of Uncle, he had regain the rather regretted memory of separating from Uncle a about a week ago,, and things have not been going as smoothly as he had hoped, which is saying something since after being recently branded a traitor and fugitive by his own father, his own was long dead and buried.

He was now stuck in the middle of the dry, rocky, treeless wasteland of the south eastern Earth Kingdom. Due to the heat and lack of water, he'd been forced to mostly rest during the day time, only moving to avoid predators or worse.

He never thought even after all this time he would actual miss that rusty old boat he was sentence to; at least then he retained some semblance of respect and reverence from some people.

Zuko sighed: sometimes, he wondered if he should just fall on his own sword and end his destiny right there.

Just then, a sudden swift breeze snapped the firebender out of brooding, causing him to whip around in many directions. His stolen ostrich horse just then appeared to be in a state of uneasiness, moaning in an anxious tone. This was all Zuko needed to know that something was off.

Suddenly, the air was chilled by a wicked chuckle.

Zuko wheeled around to see the source of the chuckle...and needless to say, he didn't know exactly whetther it was the creappiest or the wierdest sight he'd ever seen, just standing there ontop of a rock with his pale face and insect like armor.

"Well, now, what a small world! You must be Prince Zuko, banished prince of the Fire Nation! What a pleasure..."

At this Zuko snorted spitefully, swiftly yanking his hat off kung fu-style."I guess there's no use denying it; and you are...?

"Trust me on this one: my identity is nigh incomprehensible to the likes of you, and I don't care to explain the details..." the figure replied, unfolding his arms."Of course that doesn't stop me from getting to know you, now does it? You know you're not the only prince I've had the pleasure of socializing with..." he taunted forbodingly.

"If you're here to collect my bounty, There's no way you're taking me in alive..." Zuko began, getting into a firebending pose.

The smile changed in form a bit at the teen's response."Oh, don't worry now, Zu Zu, I wouldn't want a specimen such as you to lose your life prematurely; I plan on investing that precious life of yours..."

"In that case, time to claim your investment!" Zuko announced before punching a fireball at the figure, who vanished before it even had a chance to hit him.

The foe reappeared behind Zuko, arms crossed once again."Pity, not as fast as your sister was..."

The Teen roundhouse kicked a wave at the newly empty space, the figure having vanished again."What's that supposed to mean!?"

A large green blur tackle Zuko and pinned him to the ground on his back with one hand."Probably along the lines of what you think it means..." the figure gloated.

Zuko next response was using his free fist to blast a stream of fire into the villain's face...which to his shock did nothing to him.

"Kind of a shame when you think about it: your biggest problem swiftly dealt with and yet you were given no opportunity to revel in the freedom..."

"WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY SISTER, YOU FREAK!?" Zuko demanded.

"Here's a rough idea..."

As if the situation could be more reminiscent of a ghost story, what looked like a giant stinger emerged from the figure's back, directing its point straight at the petrified prince's face.

"The worst part: this hurts waaay worse than it looks like it will..." the man-no-monster hissed at Zuko.

"Well, at least I actually feel like dying right not anyway...w Zuko mentally consoled himself, thought he was disturbed at the prospect of Azula joining him.

The chuckling menace raised the stinger up, and thrust downward; but suddenly, the needle stopped a centimeter from Zuko's heart.

The creature, now having a surprised expression, turn his head in to the left as if to look behind him."I'm sorry, did you say something?"

Zuko blinked."I...I didn't say any-"

"Quit, boy, I'm listening..." the creature waved for him to silence."You mean you? Him? Why him?" he asked.

Zuko curiously glanced in the direction the creature was looking, and saw no one expect his ostrich horse: there was no one except Zuko to talk to...unless...he was talking to the horse...?

The creature shrugged."Oh right, I forgot about that; suppose it's just fitting for you and him. It's a shame, you were one of the more rational ones I've had the pleasure of talking to - scores more rational than your brother..." the creature rolled his eyes; his attention slipped back down to his prey."Well now, it appears you been given an extra life, boy - lucky you..." he lamented with a smirk, before jabbing his stinger into Zuko's abdomen, instantly incurring the aforementioned pain which made Zuko scream and writhe in agony.

At this point, one might expect some kind of mass ascending up the tail of the stinger into the creature's back; but oddly enough, the ripple were trailing out of the creature's body and into the firebender's body, clearly injecting something into Zuko. After a second, the ripples ceased, the stinger pulled painfully out of Zuko body.

The creature released his hold and rose fully erect; Zuko immediate clawed away from the creature, gasping for air and clutching his point of inoculation."Waht...What did you just put inside me!?"

The creature laughed."As I said: I have given you an extra life: you can figure out what that means on your own..." With that, the creature levitated off the dry ground and ten feet into the air."I'll see you 'round..." he took off into the sky, his laughter becoming still fainter, but somehow echoing in Zuko's brain as the entity disappeared into the clouds.

* * *

Later that night, the rest of the day somehow went on rather peacefully. Earthbenders repaired the damage to the building, as well as the Bei Fongs' servants sealing the holes in the walls and undoing the collateral damage as if nothing happened.

The company had their dessert, played some pai sho, and viewed Lao's art private collection, as was planned upon the avatar's arrival. The whole time, Vegeta was eyed stress-fully by Lao himself, who barely spoke the rest of the day, and was so disturbed by Vegeta's transformation that one would say he was familiar with it. For the most unknown of reasons, Lao had long abandoned his objection to Toph becoming Aang's earthbending master; likely it also had something to to with the newly realized Super Saiyan in his presence.

Aang had called Appa to land in the repaired front yard, carrying Mai with him.

"Well, I guess that was one interesting day..." Sokka recalled, the first to climb Appa.

"I'm just glad I don't have to go thought it again..." Toph lamented flatly."One fight I won't forget, I'll tell ya..."

Katara helped her onto the bison."Don't worry, Toph, you're gonna have a great time flying with us; I'm sure we'll all get along great... " she beamed, obviously concealing her inner manic joy of Vegeta beating her.

"Thanks for seeing our point of view, Mr. Bei Fong!" Aang thanked after hopping onto Appa's head and grabbing the reins.

"Hey, aren't we forgetting someone...?" Mai queried.

Aang perked up."Hey, Where'd Vegeta go?" he looked around, finally spotting the Saiyan leaning against a tree, good distance from the bison, and it didn't look like he was ready to move from the spot, not until they left without him.

"Vegeta! Aren't you coming? I warmed your spot for you...!" Katara called shamefully.

"Isn't it obvious, girl? I'm a Super Saiyan now, and I can fly; granted my powers still aren't no where near there peak, but it's more than enough to pass by, at least on this planet..." Vegeta, in his normal form, explained.

The Gaang paused, and collectively realized that now that his powers have returned, he no longer required any means of locomotion or protection, which means there was no longer any reason for him to remain with the team.

Sokka looked down."huh...I guess you're free now, huh...? Well good for you I guess..." he said, actually afraid he was capable of missing the warrior.

"Fantastic...can I be free now?" Mai asked.

"Not a chance, Baby..." Sokka replied with satisfaction.

"Where will you go now, Vegeta?" Aang inquired.

At this, a devious smirk played across the Super Saiyan's face."Oh I have a very special location in mind: if you recall, we've been their before, and I lost something very precious to me along the way..." he said, getting up from the tree trunk and charging his ki; he then hovered high above Appa and the front yard."And when I come back, I'm going to destroy a mountain right in front of your sorry faces!" he exclaimed before darting westward, flying off into the night with nothing to identify him but the faint glow among the clouds.

Somehow, Aang managed to smile."And I'll be waiting for it..."


	7. Like a Bitch

_"KAMEHAMEHAAAAA!"_

 _Pikkon was blindsided by the blue energy beam, flying out of the ring and bashing his skull against the stone wall. Everyone in the arena was completely shocked by the last minute victory, even the announcer._

 _"...oh, uh-Pikkon has landed out of the ring!" the mushroom headed green man exclaimed."And that means Goku is the winner!"_

 _The crowd cheered for the new Other World champion. This victory was broadcasted on every tv in the afterlife, on King Yemma's desk, in the trailers of a pair of red and blue oni, and in even hanging from the corner of a dark stone cave of a cell, and speaking of cells..._

 _"Well, that settles it," Perfect Cell began flatly," that carrot-headed idiot is finally the strongest being in the universe..."_

 _"Technically, the strongest mortal being anyway..." King Cold corrected him._

 _"But he's dead, so doesn't that make him immortal as well?" Burter wondered._

 _"If it worked that way, mate, we'd all be immortal," Jeice reminded._

 _"Man, I wish we had some money or cigarettes or something, cause I woulda' bet all mine on that guy..." Guldo lamented._

 _"Does anybody wanna arm wrestle yet?" Recoome asked._

 _"NO!" everyone else yelled._

 _Cell couldn't stand the irony: he held a whole tournament in which he himself lost, only to watch the same man he killed win an even greater tournament in the after life, AFTER getting his ass served to him and arrested by the dome-wearing frog man that was just defeated before his very eyes. He guessed powerlevels were bullshit afterall._

 _"What I still don't get is the point of this cage. I am already in Hell! What is this supposed to be, super-max-Hell!?" Cell complained._

 _"You should hold your tongue, Cell," King Cold warned,"Otherwise they'll throw you in solitary confinement-Hell like they did with my poor son..."_

 _"Right, my apologies, 'grandpa'..." Call snapped._

 _It's been quite a while since any of them had seen Freiza, after his recent escape attempt (as if he had somewhere else to escape to, being frickin dead and all...). King Yemma evidently banished him to Earth's Hell, damned to be exposed to some form of psychological torture, leaving them all to wonder what could be worse then being in regular Hell. He highly doubted it could be worse than sharing a cell with the deceased remnant of Freiza's empire._

 _"Hey, Cell, if you're technically related to King Cold," Burter asked,"Does that mean we serve you now?"_

 _"Bollocks to that!" Jeice protested,"The Ginyu Force answers to Freiza and none else!" the red Space-Australian crossed his arms,"shit, if it worked that way, we'd have to be serving under that giant purple prick-"_

 _"For your sake, pissant, I assume you were about to say 'Thanos'..."_

 _The deep voice made Jeice's scream like a bitch, along with the rest of the Ginyu Force. King Cold's eyes widened in disbelief. Even Cell was taken back as the huge figure, big as King Cold, landed into view, his arms crossed, his red eyes narrowed._

 _"Ah...You must be Perfect Cell."_

 _Cold's mouth hung open."...is...Is it you...my son!?"_

 _"Oh my god, guys, Freiza's back!" Recoome beamed...and then was promptly beamed cleaned through his skull by Cooler's finger._

 _"Call me anything you wish," Cooler said,"just don't call me the F word..."_

 _"You know he's already dead, right?" Burter asked._

 _Cell cocked his head."So, you're Lord Cooler? I suppose Freiza's cells were in short supply, because I do not recall you in this form..."_

 _"Actually, it's pronounced 'Coola'", Cold corrected with a raised finger."He simply allows his subjects to mispronounce his name as to further distinguish himself from Frieza."_

 _"Not now, Papa, if this creature is what I've heard him to be, it already knows," Cooler dismissed._

 _"Oh, don't worry, Uncle Cooler, every amazing thing you've heard about me doesn't even express just what an awesome being I am." Cell smirked._

 _"UnCooler!" Recoome joked...then was shot through the head again._

 _"Really now?" Cooler asked,"Because anything that is part-Frieza simply cannot be considered 'perfect'. I suppose that is how you ended up down here."_

 _"Excuse you, would you like to be shot through the head as well?" Cell warned._

 _"Only if you want your sentence extended..." Cooler replied_

 _"As if that'd make any difference," Cell rolled his eyes."In the cage, out of the cage, I'm still in Hell, just like you."_

 _"I'm glad you brought that up, Nephew," Cooler began, his knuckles on his hips,"Because after four years slumming it in Inferno, I've come up with way to bring you, me, my family, and these morons back from the dead."_

 _The rest of the cage's occupants gaped._

 _"BACK FROM THE DEAD!?" Guldo shreiked._

 _"YOU'RE KIDDING!" Jeice shouted._

 _"Of course he's kidding, morons," Cell scowled."Do you honestly think that only after the billions of years the damned have tried to escape the the underworld since the beginning of time, this one dude conveniently figured it out after only four years? Look, big guy, unless your plan involves a living person using the Dragon Balls to resurrect the most dangerous people in the history of space and time, I suggest you not waste your breath with it. And don't stare at me awkwardly because I just said 'dragon balls', I KNOW you know what I mean!"_

 _"I do," Cooler confirmed," and you're partially right: there WAS no way to come back from the dead without the Dragon Balls, or other outside means of resurrection...that is, before you arrived..."_

* * *

Zuko's hand stayed tentatively over the closed wound.

The Fire Prince was currently taking advantage of a family's offer to stay the night in their barn. He'd be a fool to refuse, given he had nowhere else to go and nothing left to eat. And quite fortunately for him, none of the Earth Kingdom townsfolk seemed to know who he was, the only perk to being a worthless failure. But maybe he actually did have something to be happy about, at least if he were willing to allow his sadistic side to indulge in such a thing.

But was it true? Did that monster really kill his sister? Or was it just lying to frighten him? Or...

 _"As I said: I have given you an extra life: you can figure out what that means on your own..."_

What if it did to Azula whatever it did do him? Inject something into his body? Some kind of "extra life"? Just what did that mean? Did it inject eggs into her body? Did it impregnate her!? Did it impregnate _him_!? But he's a man! How is he supposed to give birth to-!

Zuko shook his head. Now he's just frightening himself. He took a moment to breath; a good firebender's meditation was always fitting in situations like these, great for reminding him that things can never be as bad as he thinks they are.

 ** _"Oh, yes they can..."_**

"No they can't" Zuko disagreed. He then screamed like a bitch and fell out of his sitting position. "WHO SAID THAT!?"

"Who said what?" Lee asked as he peered through the barn door.

Zuko's heart pounded as he stared at the boy."I...uh...I thought I heard someone...an adult..."

Lee blinked."Oh...Well, don't worry, there's no one out here but me...sooooo...g'night." He shut the door.

The firebender's expression was very flat: either he was hearing things, or that kid's got a pretty damn wide vocal range.

* * *

It was a quiet night where the Gaang (and Mai) camped that night; everyone was all snug in their sleeping bags, except for Aang, whom stared at the sky with melancholy eyes.

"...Guys, I miss Vegeta..." he finally said.

"I sure don't," Toph replied immediately.

"You read my mind," followed Sokka.

"I'd say how I feel about him, but none of you would care," Mai sighed.

"This is also true," Sokka agreed.

"Why are you all so happy he's gone?" Katara asked,"He's been with us longer than Toph, and then he just left?"

"I never said I was happy he's gone..." Mai reminded.

"Your opinion doesn't matter; you are our prisoner of war," Sokka reminded."And it just figures you would miss him Katara; you've been drooling over his pectorals ever since you saw them."

"Oh, _this_ coming from the guy who makes his 'prisoner of war' walk around in her underwear?" Katara snapped.

"Did you _see_ how many knives she had under that shirt?" Sokka queried."I'm not taking any chances with this crazy ninja girl."

"Sokka, We have Toph now," Aang said,"she can tell if she's carrying weapons."

"How? By 'waiting and listening' for her to throw them? A lot o' good that did her when you blasted her off the arena..."

"I can definitely hear you talking right now..." Toph threatened.

Katara groaned."Here we go again, Mr. Skeptic who doesn't believe anything beyond what he's seen with his own eyes - 'there's no such things as other worlds, you're all crazy!' - you'd think after getting trapped in the Spirit World, ya know, that _other world_ , your imagination would have widened up a bit, but nope!"

"Why _are_ you so skeptical, anyway?" Mai wondered."Weren't you raised in the same primitive hunter/gatherer tribe as your sister? The Northern Water Tribe believes in spirits and magic, and they're _way_ more civilized than you guys."

"So what, I'm not allowed to think differently than others around me? That's like saying all the Air Nomads were air _benders_!" Sokka defended.

Aang raised his finger."Actually, believe it or not..."

"All I'm saying is, you act like you're this practical and know-it-all kind of guy and yet you're usually wrong, like, all the time," Mai observed,"It's like everything you say and do is just the setup for an ironic joke."

The teen warrior angrily leapt to his feet."Okay, really!? Is that all I am to you guys!? The setup for a punchline!?"

"Hey, be careful, Sokka, this is usually the part where the ironic punchline happens..." Aang warned.

"Oh really!? Well here's a doozy...!" Sokka pointed to the night sky."Vegeta is gone! And we are never gonna see him _or_ another one of those 'spaceships' falling from the sky EVER again!"

In the next beat, a huge fireball plummeted far in the distance behind Sokka, followed by a resonating _boom._

...The whole camp was deathly silent...

"...Are you sure _you're_ the Avatar?" Mai asked Aang.

* * *

The group ran over to the crash site. It was a massive smoldering crater in the dry rocky ground, and in the center lied - low and behold - a second spherical spaceship, only this one was significantly smaller than the first.

"Whoever's in there better be dead already, because if he's not, I'm gonna kill him!" Sokka fumed.

"Why? To destroy the evidence?" Katara taunted.

"Just do your thing..." Sokka blew his hand away.

Aang and Katara pulled water out of a nearby stream, and flung it into the crater, cooling it down along the ship. They then carefully traversed down the crater, surrounding the front of the small ship.

"Do you sense anything, Toph?" Aang asked.

"I sense a giant round thing made of something that is _definitely_ not earth; your guess is as good as mine." Toph replied.

"How do we open it?" Katara wondered.

"The way things are going, it'll probably open if we tell it to," Sokka grunted,"Hey, ship, open!" he shouted, cupping his hands around his mouth.

 _"Command recognized: Opening..."_ a synthesized female voice replied, steam spewing out the edges of the hatch.

Sokka clicked his tongue "...yeah...Yeah I'm gonna kill'em..." he drew his machete.

The group watched the hatch slowly descended to the ground, revealing the single occupant sitting inside.

"Oh my gosh: he looks just like Vegeta!," Aang gasped,"Except he's like a little Vegeta...with red shoulder pads...and a tail...what's that blue thing on his face?"

Sokka's grip tightened.

Aang walked stepped over the opened hatch, leaned into the little ship, and patted the person on the cheek."Hey, are you alright?"

The man's eyes twitched open; he groaned in pain and mumbled a little. His lazy eyes landed on Aang's face.

"...n...Nappa...? Did you shave?"

"DIE!" Roared Sokka as he raised his blade for a death blow.

The little Vegeta screamed like a bitch and shot the machete clean out of Sokka's hand with a ki ball. He then dashed out of his seat, knocking Aang and Sokka over and spinning around, hovering twenty feet above them. He stuck both his palms down at the group."None of you move! I know how to use these!"

They held their hands up.

"We mean you no harm!" Aang yelled.

"That pony-tailed man just tried to kill me!" He protested.

"Sorry about that!" Katara said,"He's still not over the last Saiyan we met. You are a Saiyan, right?"

"And what if I am!?" the man asked.

"Well, if you are, it'd be a heck of a coincidence," Toph answered,"Also, can you please stop floating? It's weird hearing people without feeling their feet on the ground..."

"I will descend as soon as you all lay down your arms!" the little Vegeta demanded.

"Calm down. Sokka is the only one with weapons, and Mai here is down to her underwear; the rest of us are benders," Aang explained.

"I don't care about your sexual orientation! Just drop your weapons!"

The group stared at him...

"...Sokka, just...just do what he says," Katara said in a confused tone.

The teen grunted, and took out his boomerang and club, throwing them both to the dirt."Happy now?"

"You just keep your hands where I can see them..." the man said, slowly coming down to earth.

Naturally, The Avatar was the first to approach him."I'm Aang. This is Katara, Sokka, Toph, and Mai." he gestured to all of them respectfully.

"My name is Taburu, but people just call me Tarble," the alien introduced himself."You said you've met a Saiyan before; did he look anything like me?"

"Yeah, he did," Katara said,"Only he was much bigger than you; bigger, taller, wider, broader, _stronger_ , _handsomer, strapping...such a nice butt..."_ Her eyes drifted.

Tarble's anime sweatdrop grew larger with each adjective."Yes...that...that's...you're describing Vegeta..."

"You know Vegeta?" Aang asked."Are you two related?"

Sokka huffed."Aang, you can't just assume two people of the same race are related, even if they look alike."

"Actually, Vegeta's my older brother," Tarble pointed out.

Sokka quickly picked up his machete and charged Tarble with a mad battlecry.

* * *

The city of New Ozai wasn't quite the same after the great escape orchestrated by the Avatar, in that it was no longer much of a city. The civilian population of the city was almost entirely Earth Kingdom, save for a few Fire Nation noblemen; and now that those Earth Kingdom people had abandoned the city once known as Omashu, well, the city once known as Omashu was all but abandoned.

Once such nobleman was standing on the balcony of the highest and largest building on the mountain of a city, the appointed governor of New Ozai and father of the most chronically depressed girl in Fire Nation history. The governor sighed as he beheld the empty city; progress on the enormous monument to Fire Lord Ozai was quickening ahead of schedule, and yet there were hardly any citizens to witness its completion. After all his hard work climbing to the top, he evidently became the ruler of the world's biggest ghost town.

And on top of that, with Prince Zuko branded a traitor, there was no person of royal Fire Nation blood left to betroth his daughter to; part of him hoped the Fire Lord was into underage girls, not that he'd dare to infer it out loud. Speaking of which, the hell was Mai anyhow?

His head slumped; things were not going well for him. As of now he could only hope more colonists would come to fill up the city; and perhaps Princess Azula would be willing to wait for Tom Tom to be of wedding age. These things he'd settle would be discussed for the future as he turned around-

"Boo," Vegeta greeted.

The governor screamed like a bitch, backing away and leaning against the rail.

Vegeta seized the governor by his collar, and raised him off his feet."Give me ya clothes, ya boots, and ya motorcycle," he requested robotically, with a thick Austrian accent.

"Why do you want my clothes!? What's a motorcycle!?" the governor yelped.

"Specifically, I'm referring to _my_ clothes and boots," Vegeta explained without an accent.

"What're you talking about!?"

"Oh, that's right, we've never met, have we?" the Saiyan grinned,"You ever of a certain 'bad firebender' that got into a squabble with your military police? The one that kidnapped your daughter?"

"My daughter's kidnapped!?" the governor gasped.

"Yes, yes she was," Vegeta replied,"That was me. Funny story: when your guards at the gate detained me, they stripped me of my suit and left me to hang next your deranged king."

 _"Is that a talking vegetable I hear!?"_ cried a feint voice somewhere else in the city.

"I'M COMING FOR YOU NEXT, OLD MAN!" Vegeta thundered,"Anyway, I'm here to reclaim my suit; so if you would so kind as to tell me where it is, I will kindly allow you to live. It's not hard to find - it's the one that _isn't_ red."

The governor's expression brightened."Oh, THOSE clothes!, Yes, I know exactly where they are!"

"Good, very good, because if you're lying..." Vegeta floated off the ground, over the balcony. The governor was now dangling over hundreds of feet of nothing "...You will never hear your son say your own name..."

The governor blinked."Permission to wet myself, soil myself, and of throw up at the same time?"

Vegeta yanked the governor's nose into his own."DENIED!"

* * *

The Gaang sat around a campfire with Tarble.

"I had picked up my brother's powerlevel somewhere in this quadrant; but when his ship came the nearest to your planet, his powerlevel and ship readings all suddenly vanished. I was afraid he was attacked in the middle of deep space, and so I set off for this planet as fast as I could, hoping he landed here. But then, well..." Tarble shrugged,"I suppose the exact same thing happened to me..."

"So it wasn't just Vegeta..." Aang realized."It happens to any Saiyan that comes here..."

Tarble blinked."I'm sorry, what happens?"

"When Vegeta first got here, he was almost completely unable to use his chi, or ki," Katara explained,"He had no idea what was going on with him; and only recently was he able to fly and shoot light out of his hands."

"Is _that_ what you call it!?" Toph raised an eyebrow."He was like a living explosion, exploding out more explosions!"

"That does sound a lot like Vegeta..." Tarble noted.

"He almost _destroyed Toph!"_ Sokka exclaimed."And when he first woke up, he tried to blow up a mountain!"

Tarble looked away."Sounds like him too..."

"Was Vegeta always like this?" Aang asked.

The little Saiyan nervously took another sip of tea."I'd rather not talk about my family..."

Aang's face frowned deeply.

Tarble looked back at Aang."But you said he was unable to control his ki? I can control mine just fine."

"So does that mean you can destroy mountains?" Mai wondered.

"DON'T ENCOURAGE HIM!" Sokka yelled.

"I'm not going to do that," Tarble reassured," but I supposed I could power up for you."

"Really?" Katara smiled."If you could show us your real power, that would be amazing!"

Tarble chuckled bashfully."Alright then, but...I'm certainly going to need some space..."

* * *

It was like a gift from the gods. An ancient, neatly folded treasure stumbled upon by a common archeologist. The Saiyan was almost afraid to touch it, lest he incur the wrath of some higher power.

One soldier leaned to the governor's ear."...so is this guy gonna put it on or what?"

The governor closed his eyes."Please just let the man take his time; he could kill us all."

Vegeta's eyes trembled at the sight of his Saiyan armor. It felt as though a lifetime had gone by since he wore it; he didn't even see himself as the same man that wore this suit - the man that became a Super Saiyan, the man that blew that fat android to pieces, the man that was at one time stronger that Kakarot, the man that nearly killed Cell...!

...then got his ass handed to him by Cell...and the Legendary Super Saiyan...and a creature created by the Tuffles...and then Cell's babies...and Cell again in a single strike...and a big green space pirate...also some other androids...and apparently same androids in an alternate timeline... and a metal cooler-Okay, so maybe that man had seen better days in previous outfits, but he was still a much much stronger man than he was at the moment! And right now he looked back and forth between his body and his suit, and something just didn't feel right...

"I can't wear it yet," Vegeta realized.

Everyone in the room fell down anime-style.

"What do you mean you CAN'T wear it!? It's right there! We're not stopping you!" the governor pleaded.

"Look at me, fool!" Vegeta gestured to his person."This armor has clearly been cleaned and lovingly pressed since I lost it! And here I am with this filthy, stinking body! I have not applied the proper training lotion in weeks!"

"Well I'm glad SOMEONE said something about this guy's odor!" another soldier complained,"you smell like you've been trampled under a thousand feet soaked in rotten onions, chewed by a sick and old komodo rhino for two days, and dragged through a hundred miles of swamp water!"

"I KNOW!" Vegeta whole-heartedly agreed."That last one actually happened! Someone promote this man, he gets it!"

The governor rubbed his face aggressively."Alright then. So what you mean is, you feel you need to take a bath before wearing the suit, is that right?"

"That's quite the understatement!" Vegeta replied."In order for me to _ever_ make physical contact with that armor again, I'm going to need the grandmother of all baths, a bath _among_ baths, a bath to surpass Metal Gear!" Vegeta announced, pointing to all the soldiers in the room."You people are my only hope of becoming worthy of putting on this magnificent suit again. ARE YOU WITH ME!?"

The soldiers cheered in agreement, pumping their fists to the sky. The governor simply sighed, finally realizing where his daughter gets that from.

The Saiyan prince clutched a loofa in his fist."Let us begin..."

* * *

Now in a clearing far from the camp, and with the group far from himself, Tarble took a deep breath, readying himself to unleash his energy.

The Gaang hid behind a shrub, wearing makeshift helmets. Sokka stood up and silently signaled for Tarble to commence.

Tarble nodded, and clenched his fists. The Saiyan prince's entire body tensed up, his teeth gritting. Tarble started growling, his eyes focused on the ground. It wasn't lost before the Gaang felt a breeze emitting from the Saiyan's position. The leaves of the shrub began to wave and rustle, the dust on the ground was disheveled. Tarble's growl grew in volume. The branches of all the trees in the area faintly wobbled, the stream rippled with energy. Toph could feel the ground vibrating under her feet, and so could everyone else.

Just then, Tarble broke into a scream, his expression becoming more intense as he pushed himself further. A pulse of kinetic energy passed through the Gaangs' bodies. The earth tremored and shook like an army of earthbenders were at their command. The energy caused small rocks to float before the Gaang's eyes. Electrical currents sparked all over Tarbles body, until finally out of his person erupted a fiery blue aura, along with him screaming at the top of his lungs.

The whole clearing was lit up with the aura; the trees danced madly, their rapid shadows cascading across the environment. The Gaang's hair and clothes yanked to and fro against their bodies as if they were caught in a typhoon.

"THIS. IS. AWESOME!" Sokka cried.

"HE'S INCREDIBLE!" Shouted Katara.

"YEP! STILL JUST AS SCARY AS LAST TIME!" Toph squealed.

"IS THIS WHAT _I_ LOOK LIKE WHEN I'M IN THE AVATAR STATE!? WHY DIDN'T ANYONE TELL ME I LOOKED THIS COOL!" Aang could not believe his eyes.

"Meh, I've seen volcanos eruptions bigger than this..." Mai muttered.

 _"WHAT!?"_ the Gaang exclaimed, unable to hear her.

But suddenly, Tarble's epic yell was cut short. His body cringed; he gripped his head in seeming pain. The aura vaporized, the area stopped shaking, and all that was left was the residual thunder of that power.

The Gaang was taken back.

Tarble plopped to the dirt, clutching his midsection as if he'd been struck in the abdomen.

"TARBLE!" Aang cried.

They ran over to the groaning Saiyan, afraid to touch him.

"Tarble, what happened!?" Katara yelled.

The Saiyan panted, sweat raining from his face."Ah...ah...I..AH!...I du...I dunno! guh...something just-GAH!"

"Relax! Let me help you!" Katara tried, whipping out some water from her pouch and spreading it over Tarble's back.

As the glow of Katara's healing water appeared, Tarble yelped again, but then his eyes opened upon the soothing sensation of the water. His panting transitioned into long, quiet breaths; his eyes closed again, as he fell asleep, the sleeping Saiyan now in sharp contrast to what he was a minute ago.

"He's gonna be okay, right?" Aang asked.

"He'll be fine, I think," Katara answered.

The Gaang looked at the motionless Tarble, then amongst eachother.

"Alright, guys, that settles it..." Sokka began."Whatever's happening to these Saiyans, it's because of here."

* * *

The Next morning, Zuko was sitting against the barn, still asleep.

 _"Azula always lies...Azula always lies..."_ Zuko muttered unconsciously.

 ** _"Frieza always blows up planets...Frieza always blows up planets..."_** The voice mocked.

Again, the firebender was stirred from his sleep, just in time to see Lee's mother riding up to him on a wagon.

"You have to help. It's Lee," the mother said, approaching Zuko," The thugs from town came back as soon as Gansu left. When they ordered us to give them food, Lee pulled a knife on them. I don't even know where he got a knife!

 _ **"...Well, I'm sure you're feeling pretty dumb now, aren't you, Zuko?"**_

"Then they took him away," She continued."They told me if he's old enough to fight, he's old enough to join the army. I know we barely know you, but..." she couldn't finish, her eyes consumed by tears.

But she didn't need to: Zuko understood. "I'll get your son back"

* * *

The labor was incredulous. After nine solid hours of cleansing, massage, acupuncture, yoga, and a hearty breakfast fit for Paul Bunyan, Vegeta's body was now in full optimum condition. His hair as fine as silk, his teeth shining like a new car, his skin as smooth as the day he blasted forth from his mother's vagina: he was ready.

The soldiers lined in rows before him. A great band played and sang the Fire Nation national anthem, replacing the words "Fire Lord" with "Vegeta".

A Fire Sage kneeled at his feet."Your suit, your grace..." he said as he presented the half naked man with his outfit.

The prince looked down at the sage."The pleasure is all mine."

With that, Vegeta finally placed his hands upon his beloved suit, and plucked it from the sage's hands.

The gathering watched in awe as the Saiyan wormed into his blue spandex, pushing each limb through their respective sleeves, shoving his head and arms through the upper body armor, gracefully slid his feet into his boots, and finally, thoroughly affixed his gloves over his hands: he was complete.

The soldiers cheered.

Vegeta raised an arm to quiet them."Please! This work of art was done not merely by myself, but by all of us! See what you can accomplish with your collective might and intuition! To find the true meaning of your lives, and wholly devote yourselves to it's full realization! Thanks to all of you, I, the Prince of Saiyans, have been restored to my former glory! Thanks to all of you, the universe can once again see the immeasurable grandness that is...SUPER VEGETA!"

The crowd roared in celebration.

 _"VE-GE-TA! VE-GE-TA! VE-GE-TA!"_

The Saiyan took off with his magnificent blue aura. The soldiers' hands followed him, each hoping a tiny portion of his greatness would fall on them.

And the governor...He just took a swig of beer. "It ain't easy runnin' a city..."

* * *

Tarble slowly opened his eyes to the morning sky. He rose to a sitting position and stretched; he then realized it was suddenly very easy to stretch, as his chest armor had been removed.

He quickly turned his head everywhere and saw that he was back at the camp. He noticed the Gaang eating breakfast.

"Sorry about your armor," the voice of Katara startled him. She was standing over him, holding his chest armor."I had to take it off to heal you properly."

Tarble blinked."Why apologize? I was practically having a seizure last night; might not be alive if you hadn't intervened." He got up and took his chest armor.

"Tarble! Glad to see your alright," Aang smiled.

"Not as much as I am, I think..." the Saiyan replied, putting on his armor.

"What was up with that anyway?" Sokka inquired."You were looking just like your brother when out of nowhere you looked like you had the worst case of diarrhea of the century."

"Usually that's what powering up tends to looks like; but in this case, I haven't the faintest idea," Tarble rubbed his sinus."My powerlevel was rising, and then...it was like it collided with something, and that something started to push back. I felt like I was being crushed from all sides."

"Yeah, about that: we think we know what's happening..." Toph said.

"I'm all ears," The Saiyan waited.

"We think that, somehow, it's our world that's crippling the powers of you and Vegeta, which is why you can barely use any of your strength," Aang explained,"We're pretty sure it has something to do with someone named 'Yangchen'."

"Yangchen...," Tarble repeated,"My father sometimes mentioned that name...whenever he did, he spoke of it with even more contempt than Frieza."

"Guess that confirms it," Sokka said,"your dad was here."

Tarble's eyes bugged out."Father was here!? When!?"

"All we know is that he was here sometime before Avatar Kyoshi, and that was over four hundred years ago" Aang responded. And at the mention of that particular Avatar, the current Avatar looked away sheepishly."We know this because...apparently...Kyoshi dated your dad..."

Tarble's eyes remained bugged out."...wut?"

"And get this: your dad dumped Kyoshi, and she's STILL not over it!" Sokka cracked,"He conned her into helping him build a spaceship so he could get out of here!"

Tarble's bugged out eyes were swapped for new pair of quizzical ones."Wait a minute...How did Father use a spaceship to escape the planet? Both my and Vegeta's ships lost all power as soon as we got too close to your planet. By that logic, Father never could built a working spaceship on this planet, so how could he have left?"

 _"That's a very interesting_ _question!"_

The flabbergasted group whipped their heads up to see the source of the voice, which was all too familiar to the Gaang...

"...w...What?" Aang trembled.

"That's...not...possible..." Katara breathed.

"ooooookay, NOW I'm surprised!" Mai gaped.

"Could _somebody_ please let the blind girl in on who the new floating person is and why it's so shocking?" Toph asked.

"I think it might be because these particular people are exhibiting abilities they did not previously have..." Tarble speculated.

"No, really! I'm _dying_ to know how one can travel to another world...!" Azula announced with her arms crossed, as she and Ty Lee hovered above them, their bodies surrounded in white auras,"But first, We need to ensure that _none of you_ will be escaping from us, from _this_ world or otherwise!"

They all stared at the two.

Sokka screamed like a bitch.


	8. The Perfect (Cell) Storm

_"What in Other World's name am I even looking at?"_

 _Vegeta had barely been in the den for a single minute until he was at a loss for words at the program streamed from the screen. It was a cartoon about a young Latino girl and her little troop of creatures and things that definitely should not be able to speak, on a pathetic excuse for an adventure, in which the girl would constantly ask the audience what do next, followed by an awkward silenced that was ended by blue mouse cursor clicking on the thing to do next, regardless of how painfully obvious it was to do next, capped off by a passing band of insects._

 _Evidently, this was what his lover had been subjecting his infant son to every morning while the rich earth woman was off doing whatever is was that rich earth women do. The prince wasn't sure of what to be more disgusted by: the show, the woman's mother forcing the baby to watch to the show, or the fact that the baby was actually enjoying the goddamn show._

 _"Oh, hi, Vegeta, I didn't see ya there!" Mrs. Briefs turned her head to the Saiyan, her ageless face beaming with the typical unnatural joy he was barely accustomed to,"How was yer trainin' today?"_

 _"Somehow far less painful than the sight before me..." Vegeta replied, glaring at the lady "Is this mindless tripe what passes for education on this planet!? What's even the point? Every obstacle the little girl encounters is simply done away with for her with no effort on her part at all! How is a my son supposed to learn how to survive alone in the cruel merciless wilderness with only a map and a backpack as his only means of survival if he isn't taught how to think for himself!?"_

 _"Hun', yer over thinkin' it a little," Mrs. Breifs stated," This cartoon is made for ages four and younger."_

 _"Four!?" Vegeta's brow furrowed," I was coordinating air strikes at that age! Gimme that module!" he barked as he snatched the remote from the surprised lady's delicate hand; he then abruptly plopped to the couch next her, turning the program off "That is the future of the royal Saiyan lineage sitting on your lap, and I if he must watch something, it will NOT be that!" He ranted as he scrolled the media app for something else. Naturally, Trunks started crying._

 _Mrs. Briefs tapped her cheek,"Well I guess we could watch Indiana Jones. Ooh! I've never seen the fourth one!" she chirped._

 _"Watch it on your own time, crone..." replied Vegeta as he kept scrolling, until he found something quite interesting to him."Here we go..." he smirked as he played the movie._

 _Mrs. Briefs eyes actually bulged wide open as Leonardo DiCaprio was mauled by a grizzly bear._

 _"You see, boy?" Vegeta smiled proudly at his offspring," **this** is what really happened to Dora..."_

 _Trunks giggled and clapped his tiny hands at the hi-resolution carnage._

* * *

A huge, round, metallic mass rose from the lake surface, groaning and creaking as it rolled closer ashore.

Once Vegeta's head breached the water, he took a deep breath of air and paused for a moment to regain some stamina. He then grunted loudly as he rolled the giant space ship out of the lake and onto the dirt. The Saiyan breathed in and out in relief for a moment, before the ship slowly rolled backwards, forcing him to push it even further from the water. With the ship rested, he too rested his hand against the ship, still breathing loudly.

Well, that was it. This was the thing he would have and should have been able to have done upon crashing onto this rock. Vegeta had to admit, a few very bad days it had been for this prince of Saiyans, but now it seemed this perfect storm of misery was steadily clearing away. No, he still didn't have his full power back, but having enough raw strength to push his spaceship onto dry land was enough to put a smile on his face. Now came what was by sheer comparison to the recent past the easy part: getting the ship operational.

He spared no time to rip the door off its hinges and enter the sopping wet craft. What a crazy thing it'd be, Vegeta mused, if this thing were to be totally fine and take off into orbit with no problem; at this point he didn't know whether that thought would jinx the ship into actually doing just that or jinx it not to. Of course, when he reached the deck, and pushed the ignition...

...not a sound.

 _"That's what I figured,"_ figured Vegeta. He then cracked his knuckles. _"Time to get to work..."_

* * *

The arid landscape echoed with a scream, though not the same elongated scream as before.

Aang and Katara stood there, agape at the two floating, glowing girls. Mai was totally speechless. Toph was still visibly miffed, since her question. had still yet to be answered.

Azula simply up floated there with a smirk on her face, taking in the vocal terror emanating from the Water Tribe teen, while Ty Lee's attention was caught by a cute little humming bird floating near her.

Tarble could only stare at the still bitch-screaming Sokka. He leaned closer to Katara,"Is your brother trying to power up?"

The fed up Toph clutched her fingered around Sokka's ice cubes, reducing his scream into a shrill squeak."Now then, what are we looking at?"

"What you're looking at," Azula began," Is the crowned princess of the Fire Nation, whom has now attained a power beyond your wildest imagination!" she declared maniacally.

"And also me!" Ty Lee added."Only not a princess." she lamented. Though something else caught her attention."Oh my gosh! It's MAI!" she cried happily as she dashed downward, forcing the group to jump out of the way as she snatched the goth off the ground.

The group look up as Ty Lee gave her shocked friend a gravity defying bear-hug."We finally found you! I was so worried! What happened to your clothes? Did that mean ol' Avatar take them from you?" she beamed as she spun round and round and cuddled with her increasingly nauseated friend.

"Put me down! PUT ME DOWN!" Mai begged.

"OK!" Ty Lee peeped, letting her go.

The once emotionless but now terrified teen plummeted to the dirt rather painfully.

"How are you doing that!?" Aang demanded.

"What's the matter, Avatar? Are you upset that your title as the most powerful being on earth has officially been revoked?" taunted Azula. She shook her head, feigning sadness."Oh how awful you must feel, with the revelation that there's nothing _special_ about you anymore..."

"As if there were anything special about _you_!" Tarble interjected.

Azula eyed the Saiyan."I'm sorry, is it me or are you significantly shorter than when we first met?"

"You must be talking about my brother. And just so you two understand the gravity of the fact..." Tarble began, before dashing up to their level,"I'm _Vegeta's_ brother..."

"hm hm hm, Is that supposed to scare me?" the empowered Azula giggled,"Ty Lee over here immobilized that loudmouthed imbecile before we even attained our new power."

The Saiyan bared a smirk all the more reminiscent of his brother."Interesting tale. Well, before you prattle further about your amazing new gift, I ought to make you natives aware of two things: You had caught Vegeta at a very inconvenient time, in which he inexplicably found himself drained of nearly all of his ki, or chi as your people call it; had he even a grain of his true power, you and the general area would have been obliterated in an instant..."

"Wow, that does sound very inconvenient," Azula patronized,"and the second important thing? Which I can only assume is far more important?"

"You catch on quick," Tarble continued, clenching his fist and steadily raising his power level,"Concerning your newly attained power, the ability to harness one's ki for all kinds of feats that you would see as superhuman is in fact quite common among a startling amount of worlds throughout the universe..."

"I KNEW aliens were real!" Ty Lee cheered.

"Preach!" Katara added.

Then suddenly, their attention was snatched by the explosion of Tarble blue aura. Even Azula's facial muscles tense at the sudden influx of energy.

"In fact..." Tarble sneered,"my own people served among other races as an unstoppable force of intergalactic warriors, each of whom - and this is just my personal estimate - could wipe out all life on this planet in a single blast."

The glowing princess's confidence waned from his words.

The prince shrugged,"I mean, I myself am what you'd consider to be one of slightly less than average powerlevel, roughly 300 battle power, but I'm pretty damn certain I could annihilate your world's moon if I wanted to..."

"Leave my ex out of this!" Sokka barked.

"But you two? Making such a display of yourselves for simply being able to fly? I mean how embarrassing..." Tarble shook his head as the two girls hastily readied for combat. Instead of attacking, the Saiyan stretched his left hand downwards; his scouter flew right up into his hand, putting it on, and scanning the the pair."But what more could an interstellar traveler like myself expect from a pair of primitive teenagers with a meager respective powerlevel of nine-" Tarble's aura totally flickered away, his eyes bugged out.

Both the Gaang and the girls were taken back by his silence.

"n-nini-nine...ninenen...damn my Saiyan pride..." Tarble immediately descended to the ground faster than he ascended.

Azula blinked twice at the man's sudden shift in attitude...as if he just he'd found out something he wish he hadn't."Excuse me, Mr. Space-traveler, that little device over your eye...was that what you were using to detect my 'powerlevel' as you said?" the princess seemingly stole Tarble's smirk and wore it for herself,"I couldn't help but notice that you were going to say some number that began with 'nine' before you cut yourself off. Well, what was your reading? Was it nineteen? Ninety? Nine _hundred_?"

Everyone watched Tarble's twitchy face frown deeper as Azula deduced further, And Azula's smiled proportionally grew wider.

The equally worrisome Sokka glared at the Saiyan that was even shorter than Vegeta."...Tarble...please don't tell me that both of them have a higher powerlevel than you-"

Tarble spun around in terror. **"IT'S OVER NINE-!"**

* * *

"-thousand other planets I could have crashed onto, but it just HAD to be one with no means of long-distance communication what so goddamn ever!" Vegeta growled, slapping his forehead.

Vegeta had finally managed to get the emergency comlink receiver to activate; unfortunately, there were so far no signals at all to be received, which in turn meant there was nothing to boost his own communicator's weak signal to contact intergalactic aid. No radio towers, no telephone lines, no satellite broadcasts, not even telegrams! Seriously!? The Fire Nation has tanks, jet skis, and a gigantic friggin drill (he over heard the governor mentioning progress on it during his bath), but the simple concept of electromagnetic waves eludes them!?

Well, this was just great: a decent amount of his energy back but nobody to fight with it, a spaceship with no power to fly, and an antenna with no signal to pickup - having all this seemed more pointless than trying to set a record for how long an outdoor statue can remain free of bird droppings! Vegeta did contemplate using his ki to jump-start the engine, but the last time he tried that...let's just say he was the only survivor...even at his current level, he didn't want to risk frying the circuit board.

So in other words, he was even more screwed than he thought: still trapped on this planet, still no means of escape, and _now_ no means of contacting any entity off-world.

 _"...off-world..."_

This caused the Saiyan to have an epiphany: perhaps he was looking in the wrong direction. All things considered, this planet may still be going through its own relative steam age - and that's just one out of the other primitive civilizations on this rock - but what if, somewhere in the world, the above mentioned technologies primitive in and of themselves were bypassed in the wake of more advanced methods of signal transmission? As in, _Frieza Force_ kind of advanced? It wouldn't be so improbable, nor would it be the first planet to make such an ingenious leap.

Vegeta reconfigured the settings on the communicator, having it look for the kind of signals directly generated by scouters; if he could just find one reading even remotely similar to that of a scouter, then he could-

"ONE SCOUTER SIGNAL DETECTED" bleeped the comlink screen.

Vegeta blinked...

Sheer coincidence or ethereal punchline, it mattered not, the prince mashed the 'enter' key without a second thought."Hello!? Can anyone hear me!? This is Prince Veget-"

 _ **"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!-"**_

Vegeta jerked away from the speaker and muted it."...ooookay then..."

That random noise was either one of two things: high frequency magnetic static caused by a solar flare, or an elongated spine-chilling scream emitted by a person who'd just scanned the powerlevel of his enemy and realized it's significantly higher than his own. On a side note, it also sounded very familiar...

* * *

 **"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNND!"** Tarble finally finished.

Sokka, his hair sticking the opposite direction of Tarble's face, a thin layer of skin peeled from his own face, and blood trickling from his ears, stared at the Saiyan blankly."...yeah, you're definitely related to Vegeta..."

"...sorry..."

"Wow, nine thousand?" Ty Lee repeated far more calmly," that's like, ten times higher than yours!"

"Correction..." Azula sneered," it's thirty times higher."

Katara gulped."b-b-But wait...Tarble said he could destroy the moon..."

"And that means _they_ could destroy a total of _sixty_ moons!" Aang frightfully estimated.

"STOP PUTTING IT IN THEIR HEADS!" Sokka reminded.

"Too late, the possibilities are simply piling up," the princess remarked, descending to the ground with Ty Lee following.

Everyone cringed in fear as the two landed, and approached on foot.

"So, now that we've surmised that I and Ty Lee are essentially your gods now, how about you do the smart thing and hand yourself over to us, so that we may present you to my father and thus win us the war? I'd also dis-encourage any of you from killing your airbending friend so that the Avatar can reincarnate, otherwise we'd have to annihilate all Water Tribes - that includes the Foggy Swamp Tribe, yes, we know about it - as your new friend _explicitly_ clarified we can now do..."

The Gaang was frozen solid.

Tarble blinked."...permission to wet myself, soil myself, and vomit at the same time?"

Azula and Tylee both pointed flaming energy balls at the Saiyan."Denied..."

"ROCKALANCHE!" Toph roared stomping both feet, causing both cliffsides on either end to crumble onto the ground, creating a huge cloud of dust. This allowed the Gaang and Mai to fly away on Appa, Tarble anxiously tailing them.

Azula and Ty Lee Zoomed out of the dust cloud.

"Hurry, Azula! We gotta save Mai!" the gymnast cried.

"No promises..." glared the princess.

They blasted off after them.

* * *

Zuko slammed back-first on the dirt, lying motionless before his cruel unmerciful earthbending opponent. The crowd stood helplessly as the only man ever to stand up to Gow had been swiftly punished for his courage.

"No! Get up!" Lee cried in vain.

Gow merely laughed."You should've minded your own business, boy, instead of bringing swords to an earthbending fight."

But said boy was too daze too hear the soldier. His rattled brain drifted back into the one of the last few good memories of his life...

 _"Mom?" the y_ _oung Zuko mumbled as he saw his mother looked down at him with a forlorn gaze, as if she had done something wrong._

 _ **"** Zuko, please, my love, listen to me" Ursa breathed" Everything I've done,"she held him tight," I've done to protect you. Remember this, Zuko. No matter how things may seem to change, never forget who you are..."_

 ** _"That's right, Zuko..."_**

 _The child's eyes widened at the terrifying but familiar voice. His mother faded away like vapor."Mom? Mom! Where are you!?"_

 _" **Your mother is gone, as are you..."**_

 _The walls window, floor, and room faded as well, leaving the child alone, floating on his bed in the dark and vast cosmos._

 ** _"You've forgotten who you are, what you are, allowing these primitive brutes to defeat you. You are beyond this man, as I am beyond you..."_**

 _"What is this voice in my head!?" Zuko cried,"What are you!?"_

 _Before Zuko opened a_ _n enormous pair of red eyes._

 _ **"Why don't I show you?"** _

Gow loomed over his his downed victim, his war hammers raised to finish him off. Suddenly, Zuko's eyes shot open, and let out a thunderous roar that shook the town, blowing Gow away with a shockwave of invisible energy. Now was Gow's turn to hit the dirt on his back.

Lee and all of the townsfolk looked in shock and awe; Gow grunted off his back and cracked an eye open, both eyes then widening the source of the sudden wind gust.

There stood Zuko, or rather, _levitated_ Zuko, just a couple inches from the ground; his fists tightened, his hair and clothes waving upwards from his purple aura, and his eyes gone, replaced with the luminescent red eyes from his dream.

Gow lept to his feet and stomped two rocks out of the ground, bashing them as Zuko with his hammers, but the larges stones couldn't even penetrate the aura, bursting into dust.

Zuko raised his finger at the stunned Gow, and smirked. **"Tonight I dine on earthbender-soup."** His announced, with a new voice next to his own. A pink beam shot from the tip of his finger, blasting one hammer clean out of Gow's right hand; Gow was so surprised by this that he could anticipate Zuko dashing forth and kneeing him in the gut with tremendous force. Gow wheezed in such pain that his left hammer fell from his fingers, and fell to his knees, clutching his stomach.

Zuko turned to a certain old man in the sidelines. **"What was** **it** **you said, human?"**

Gow slowly raised his head, looking up at Zuko.

 **"Oh I remember: give'em a left!"** With a simple whip of his left back hand, Gow was sent flying into a support beam so hard that it cracked, followed by a lighting-fast slug to the stomach that snapped the wooden beam in half. Zuko took Gow by his middle and flung him into the air, the man landing painfully on the dirt ground. Zuko zipped back in his face as soon as Gow pushed his face off the ground. **"And now for a _right!_ " **Zuko followed up with a right uppercut to Gow's chin, again launching the earthbender off the ground; this time Zuko intercepted Gow in mid-flight with a kick into the abs, driving Gow across the ground with his foot.

Gow was driven all the way too the other side of the small town, right into the post next to the one Lee was tight up to. The child watched in horror as the young man he saw as a hero just minute before brutally nail his heel back into Gow's stomach even harder, caving in the man's rib cage. **"Look at you, you disgusting earthworm..."** Zuko hissed, as the soldier screamed so loud his voice was barely recognizable, **"Your will is unshakable as long as you have your 'pigs' to play with; I'd never thought I'd meet a maggot so revoltingly similar to my own rotten little brother."** The one whom was obviously no longer Zuko aimed him finger centimeters from Gow's forehead.

Lee couldn't take anymore."STOP IT!"

The entity turned his red eyes to the boy, watching the tears pour from his eyes. The scowling face twitched, his sight faded back and forth between the boy and the face of the child Zuko. He screamed and clutched his head, staggering back from Gow and the post. He lurched and spun around, crouching to his knees with his face covered.

The purple aura changed to a feint white then flickered away, leaving only the teen straining to breath. He uncovered his face, and his eyes reopened, the eyes of Zuko returned. Zuko's wide eyes whipped back and forth across the town, seeing the terrified faces of the people, the traumatized Lee, and the soldier, bleeding from the mouth."..wa...What just happened?"

"He's a freak!"

"He's possessed!"

"Get out of our town, you monster!"

The people shifted from fear to anger, all barking equally hateful things as they began to throw rocks at what they saw as their new enemy. Zuko shielded himself from the rocks and fearfully stumbled to his feet, sprinting away under the entrance arch to the town and into the horizon.

* * *

Sokka whipped Appa's reigns like a maniac, forcing the bison to fly as fast as it could through the canyon. Tarble soared just behind, volleying energy balls to fend of their pursuers. Aang swiped his staff at them, sending wave after wave of wind. Toph launched as many boulders in their general direction faster than her mind could sense them. Katara would still have been throwing water at them, but her water punch went dry in under two seconds, so she simply cowered under the blanket with Mai.

"Are they gone yet?" Katara asked, peeping through the blanket.

"WHAT THE HELL DO _YOU_ THINK!?" Sokka screamed.

Azula either dodged every projectile thrown at her, or blew it away with a fiery ki blast. Ty Lee was clearly having some fun, ignoring her ability to fly to bound off of the boulders like some kind of super-powered ninja."Weee! This is fun, dattebayo!?"

Tarble maneuvered parallel to where Sokka sat."Alright, I think we have an advantage, their powerlevels may be high, but they don't seem to be accustomed to them; otherwise, they would have wiped out out with one huge blast. We just have to keep flying and wait for them to tire out."

"They both have thirty times more chi than you!" Sokka reminded."And Appa doesn't have _any_ chi! Which one of the two do ya think'll run outtta steam first!?"

"Okay first of all, if your animal has no ki, it would be dead; and second, if they're not used to the level they're currently at, it means that their bodies aren't either - they're expending more ki than they realize just to maintain those powerlevels! This is exactly why King Cold never transforms beyond his second form! I mean, well, it's also because his second form is his tallest form and he always stays in it." Tarble giggled."I wish could you could see him in his base form, he's as short as FriezAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" He suddenly cried as his tail was grazed by a thin laser beam.

Azula stared at her finger."...Huh...I wonder why I managed to hit him that time..." she attempted the same attack at Aang, but narrowly missed.

"We don't have time for that!" Aang yelled."We need another plan!"

A conflicted look came on Tarble's face as he rubbed his chin."Well, there _is_ this one technique I learned for situations like this, but it'd be very risky for all of you!"

"We're risking our lives right now! Let's here it!" Toph demanded.

Tarble stared into the sky apprehensively."Well...There was once this brilliant scientist named Bard-"

"INCOMING!"Sokka shreiked.

In the next instant, Tarble was slammed out of Sokka's site by a green blur.

Aang gasped."What in the world was...!?"

A large ki beam grazed Appa's side, the bison lurching in pain and dangerously losing speed and altitude. Appa's belly grinded against the dirt for a hundred feet until all the occupant were flung out of the saddle. Azula and Ty Lee landed right behind the scene of the crash.

Aang painfully tumbled along the ground, finally stopping on his face.

"...So..." a new, deep male voice began.

Aang was startled by the voice.

"You must be the Avatar."

Aang pushed his chest from the dirt, breathing loudly, his heart pounding nervously tilted his eyes up to the source of the voice.

"Nice to meet you, Aang..."

Aang...blinked...there was no one standing in front of him. He then flipped on his back to see the actual source of the voice of the person, whom was far behind him, not even looking at him, instead staring at the scared but confused Sokka.

Azula slapped her forehead."Cell, you dumbass, that peasant isn't Avatar Aang, it's the kid behind you!" She spat, pointing a frustrated finger.

Perfect Cell looked up at Azula quizzically; he then turned around to see said kid."...oh...er-" Cell quickly teleported infront of Aang." _ahem_ -So, YOU must be Avatar Aang! Nice to...meet...you...Aang-goddammit, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE!? Now I just look like a moron!" he barked at Azula.

Ty Lee groaned."We DID tell you! Like, a million times!" she yelled, flinging her hands toward Aang as Azula rubbed her sinus.

"I know, but...!" Cell sighed, looking away and massaging his forehead."Every time I hear the word 'avatar', I just keep picturing a blue Native American with a pony tail..."

"What even _is_ an American?" Azula questioned.

"It's this civilization in an entirely different galaxy millions of light years away from here but somehow speaks the exact same language as all of you despite the fact that your people seem to lack any trace of Anglican/European cultur-WHATEVER!" Cell shook his head,"We're getting off track; we all know who Avatar Aang is, let's just start over..."

"Do we all _also_ know that we've been arguing for so long as to allow the Avatar to escape?" Azula point again.

Cell whipped around to see the teens far in the distance, desperately running away. His head spun back to Azula."Oh, screw BOTH of you!" Cell dashed at sonic speeds, knocking down each member of the gang with single strikes. Cell landed in the center of the painfully moaning children."Are we missing someone?"

Tarble burst back onto the scene with a cocked fist, bright aura, and a loud battle cry; only to be struck in the opposite direction by Azula's back hand, rendering him unconscious.

"We good." Ty Lee noted.

"Why...did you let him...hit _me..._?" Mai grunted.

"Hm?" Azula raised a brow."...oh, is that you, Mai? I didn't noticed you..."

"I...hate...you..." the goth seethed.

"What the hell are you!?" Toph growled, before getting kicked in the stomach.

"Watch your language, little one..." Cell teased,"otherwise you'll end up like The Boulder..."

Toph's blind eyes widened." _You_ killed the Boulder!? You bastard!" she roared, leaping up to her feet and launching a boulder at him to unconsciously pay homage to the fallen fighter.

Cell punched the incoming rock into dust."...What..." he zipped in front of Toph and slapped her back to the ground "...did I _just_ say?"

"Leave Toph alone!" Aang shouted, throwing a wind funnel that push Cell off his feet; not that it mattered, Cell was merely floating.

Cell stared at the boy awkwardly."...did...Did you just fart out of your hand?"

Aang blinked."wha-No, that was airbending."

"That's called farting," Cell replied.

"No it's not!" Aang yelled."I'm an airbender; I control air my mind."

"So, it's like a brain-fart?"

"NO! It's called AIRBENDING!" Aang shouted angrily.

"Look, if you're discharging air from your body, then it's a fart; there's no way around this." Cell crossing his arms, not budging on the matter.

"Well, what do _you_ call it when you levitate from the ground!?" Aang demanded.

"The 'air dancing technique' ," Cell answered.

"Okay, well I guess you're farting out of your legs then!" Aang cried immaturely.

"I'm using ki to levitate! That's totally different!" Cell responded in the same tone.

"Is not!" Aang argued.

"Is too!" Cell bickered.

"Is NOT!" Aang persisted.

"IS DAMN TOO! Why are you being so petty!?" Cell screamed.

Aang smirked."Just to distract you."

Cell blinked."...What-"

Cell was crushed between two huge boulders, courtesy of Toph."Slap _me_ , will ya!?" with a swing of her clasped fists, she sent the fused boulders into the cliff-side, kicking up a huge plum of dust and debris.

"Nice one!" Cheered Sokka.

In another blast of dust, Cell shot out and above them, arms crossed and seemingly unharmed."Right, a cheap shot, how impressive; unlike you, I'm respectful enough to shoot my enemies not in the back, but in the face!" he announced as he charged a ki ball in his hand.

Aang yelped, jumping out of the way of the ki ball, which blew the rest of the gang off their feet once again. The airbender leaped across the land, narrowly evading Cell's one-handed volley of energy blasts. He bounded from rock to rock as each was shattered to pieces.

"We need to help Aang!" Katara said.

"I don't see _you_ helping, 'Sifu Katara' ", Sokka replied.

"I don't have any water left; what do you expect me to do!?" Katara queried.

"Well, then don't say 'we'!" Sokka defended.

Mai stared."Can't you just, like, bend the water in that bug guy's body?" she suggested.

Katara spun to Mai with a disturbed look."What!? That the sickest thing I've heard! What's wrong with you!?"

"You're little airbender friend's gonna die; look, people are like half water, just yank the blood out of that dude and suck'em dry like a bat-mosquito."

"As horrifying as that sounds, I won't say it's a bad plan..." Sokka half-agreed.

"I am NOT doing that!" Katara affirmed, her face losing color.

Toph snorted."Well if you're not gonna fight, Sugarqueen, then I-!"

Just then, Azula and Ty Lee appeared over them with ki balls aimed at Toph's face."Will not be fighting either," Azula corrected."This is the Avatar's problem; let him sort it out for himself." She smirked.

The group scowled at her helplessly; Mai shrugged."Just saiyan..."

Aang air-scootered up the cliffside with the ki blast trailing his every move; Aang kicked off the edge of the cliff, somersaulted in Cell's direction, and sent a powerful air blast at him. Cell crossed his arms over his face and withstood the blast, and retaliated with a Kienzan; the sight of the incoming disc frightened Aang into frantically dodging it; the energy blade so thinly passing over his skull that it would have shaved his yet to exist hair. The discombobulated airbender soared right into Cell's hand, which gripped him by his collar.

Cell chuckled, glaring daggers into the boy's pupils."I'm getting the impression that, unlike me, your tiny body cannot endure as much power as it can deliver..."

"At least _I'm_ not about to be rammed by a flying bison," Aang grinned.

"Excuse me?" Cell questioned, before he was startled by a thundering roar, and look to his left to see the incoming Appa.

Aang took advantage of the distraction by jumping off of Cell's stomach right before the giant furry head slammed into Cell. Aang land smoothly as Appa tackled Cell to the ground with a loud thud, repeatedly stomping him under his massive four legs.

"GO, APPA!" Sokka pumped his fists skyward."Man! We seriously need to stop forgetting about him in these situations..." He lamented. Just then, Momo (whom the writer had honestly forgot even existed for some time) landed on the teen's shoulder.

Appa reeled back for another stomp; but before his feet could land, the livid Cell caught them with his bare hands. The Gaang's jaws dropped as Cell growled his way under the animal's belly, and lift the giant beast clear off the ground.

"Take your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ox!" Cell roared as he sent Appa flying over everyone's heads.

Tarble lazily woke up just in time to see a the furry white mass land on him with a resonating boom. His muffled moan could be heard from beneath.

"That's impossible!" Aang gaped."Appa weighs ten tons!"

"Only _ten_?" Cell heard. He looked at his hands. _"Damn, I'm even weaker then I thought..."_ "At least tell me those were metric tons?"

"How much is a metric-" Aang was cut off by a punishing fist to the stomach.

"This much..." Cell smirked.

"How unfortunate, it seems you've all just ran out of options," Azula noted with false pity,"Oh well, at least you never gave up without a fight; I'm sure the Earth Kingdom will remember you as heroes for genera-oh wait, I forgot, there won't _be_ any Earth Kingdom to celebrate you, only the supreme Fire Nation that'll celebrate your defeat." She joked as she loomed over the forlorn team.

"Told'ja you should;ve bended his blood..." Mai reminded."Oh, and thanks for 'rescuing' me by the way, Azula, incase you forgot I was there prisoner this whole time..."

"I did," Azula admitted,"and I do not apologize."

"So, now to address the shrew-elephant in the room: how did you guys those crazy superpowers?"

"Why, they were a lovely gift from our new friend," The princess gestured to none other than the pale figure that kept his feet firmly pressed on the airbender's chest."Meet Perfect Cell - the ultimate lifeform."

* * *

"I finally found you, Faker!" Sonic The Hedgehog threw his gloved finger up at his target.

"Faker?" Shadow The Hedgehog repeated quizzicly,"I think _your_ the fake hedeghog around-Arg!" suddenly yelled Shadow as he clutched his heart in agony.

"What's wrong with you?" Sonic raised his brow.

Shadow panted."I...I feel as though something precious has been robbed from me..."

Sonic glared."You mean _besides_ Maria?"

Shadow instantly pinned Sonic to the ground with his foot; savagely gripping a Kryptonite headed spear."WHY DID YOU SAY THAT NAME!?"

* * *

"Thanks to this magnificent bug-man, Ty Lee and myself have been given a tremendous portion of his chi, thus Avatar and his mastery of the four elements has been removed from the equation; frankly, I'm only taking you alive for the sport of it. Not even your Avatar State could compare with a powerlevel of over nine thousand."

"Wait, nine thousand?" Cell queried,"How do you know what your powerlevel is, let alone what power are at all?"

"That guy Appa fell on told her," Toph told him.

 _"help...me..."_ moaned Tarble, still beneath Appa.

"Ah," Cell understood."Welp', I'd listen to her if I were you, child; after all, _my_ powerlevel is immeasurable by scouters, though I'd estimate it's well within ten figures..." he smirked.

Aang look at the sky with a pensive expression."So...how many moons could _you_ destroy?"

Sokka slapped his forehead, making a mental note to hook back up with Suki if he were to survive beyond this day.

Cell pressed his foot slightly harder on Aang's chest, silencing him."That's a very good question, maggot; unfortunately, I have more important matters to attend to - you are seriously overdue for a present, my little flatulent friend..." he sneered. From behind him emerged his long yellow tail."Hope you're not scared of needles..."

As the team reeled back in horror, Azula attained a highly confused look."Wait a second. What are you doing? You're not actually going to give _him_ some of your chi!?"

"Trust me, your highness..." Cell gleemed, lowering the tip of his stinger inches over the terrified airbender's throat,"The blessing that I'm about to bestow upon him shall be his greatest curse..."

Aang's breathing intensified, sweating bullets from his head.

Cell narrowed his eyes, and whispered only the boy, _"Get ready to meet Granddad, Avatar..."_

"NO!" Sokka shrieked, leaping to save his friend as the raised stinger thrusted downward.

 ***stab***

The canyon echoed with an agonizing scream...though not the one intended...

Azula, Ty Lee, Mai, Katara, Toph, Aang, and Cell's mouths opened wide as the stinger rested into Sokka's back, pumping some mysterious fluid into his body, causing Sokka to whale and convulse at Aang's expense.

"...huh..." Cell observed,"Well this is a pickle..."

"What're you doing to him!?" Katara demanded."STOP IT!"

"I, erm, cannot actually," Cell answered sheepishly,"It's like an ejaculation - it can't be stopped once it starts..."

"...dude...ew..." Mai hissed,"He's fifteen..."

"I'm seven!" Cell barked as he casually flung Sokka off his tail; his motionless body plopping before Katara.

"Sokka!" his sister naturally cried, and held him in her arms.

"Great, that's another valuable soul wasted - can't say I'm going to miss him though..." Cell lamented.

"What the heck did you just to Sokka!?" Toph yelled, negatively reinforced by Cell to not use the other word.

"Oh, well, it shouldn't too hard for you to figure out, as friends of the mighty Avatar and all," Cell mocked,"he has a whole plethora of past lives residing in _his_ body; now, brave little Sokka has one of his own." He laughed,"What do you have to say about that, boy?" he taunted as he looked back down at said boy...only to be very, very surprised at his response.

Aang's eyes and tattoos glow bright white. Cell was suddenly engulfed in a small typhoon. **"I WILL DESTROY YOU!"**

"HELL NO!" Cell shouted, zapping Aang's head with Piccolo's eye beam attack, isntantly rendering the child asleep."I will NOT be receiving any surprise beatdowns from any more pacifistic adolescent heroes, thank you very much!" He resolved, charging a Death Beam toward Aang's head.

"AANG!" Katara cried.

"Feel free to take the bullet, kid; it turned out so well for you brother..." Cell sneered.

Azula _ahem'd_ rather loudly."Um, excuse me - what part about taking the Avatar alive was lost in translation?"

"You can go look for'em yourself in his next life, princess!" Cell sternly replied,"Who knows? Maybe it'll be a girl next time, and she'll grow up to fight terrorists, demons, occultists, and giant robots!"

"I dunno why, but I'm not lookin' forward to that second one..." Sokka hazily noted.

As Cell intensified the pink energy ball from his finger, his face consumed with a murderous grin, a sudden feint noise caught his attention, as well as everyone else's.

"The hell is that?" Cell wondered.

The louder the noise got, the clearer it became - it was not just any noise, it was a very particular _elongated scream_.

Cell's eyes grew like dinner plates."No...it can't be..."

Sokka chuckled."I never thought I'd be happy to hear that sound..."

In the next instant the canyon echoed with a supersonic boom, followed by Cell screaming in pain, he body bending over due to the gloved fist of an extremely nettled Super Saiyan.

"You..." Vegeta hissed "...are..." Vegeta followed up with a powerful uppercut to Cell's chin, send him flying into the sky. Vegeta blast up after him, pounding Cell's face and body with a lighting-fast string of punches and kicks "...SUPPOSED TO BE...!" Vegeta clasped his hands together and bashed Cell's skull, launching him like a rocket into a nearby mountain. Vegeta flung his right palm toward the crater containing Cell. **"DEEEAAAD!"** He thundered as he fired his Big Bang Attack.

The disoriented Cell opened his eyes just in time to see the incoming attack."OH SHI-!"

Both Cell and the mountain were consumed by a massive, blinding explosion, kicking up storm-like winds and causing the Gaang to shield their eyes and struggle to stay on their feet.

When the winds settled, everyone opened their eyes to see an enormous mushroom cloud of smoke where the mountain used to be.

Vegeta abruptly landed before Azula and Ty Lee, glaring pure death at them.

Azula smirked."Well well, look who finally found his precious outfit-"

"DO I LOOK LIKE I'M IN THE MOOD FOR YOUR BULLSHIT, WOMAN!?" The Super Saiyan thundered, now pointing an energy ball of death at the two.

Azula blinked."...point made..." she noted before both she and Ty Lee blasted off to find Cell.

With that, Vegeta powered down, heaving even harder than while he was pushing his ship out of the lake.

"Vegeta, you're back!" Katara cried happily.

"Yeah, I'm back," Vegeta snapped,"and I finally have my goddamn clothes on; sad for you." He threw his finger behind him."Now, could SOMEBODY tell me how those stupid girls can suddenly fly, how in the hell you found a scouter, and HOW THE F&($ CELL IS STILL ALIVE!?"

"Well, apparently, that Cell guy gave them a crap-ton of of chi," Toph answered."Also, we didn't find a scouter, a scouter found us," She point to Appa," and by 'scouter', I mean your brother."

Vegeta turned to the direction of Toph's finger seeing only the bison; he then noticed a whimpering moan emanating from underneath said bison."Oh, I see, so because you meet someone else from space with technology similar to my own, you _assume_ he and I must be related!"

 _"Save me, Onīsan..."_ Tarble sobbed.

Vegeta blinked."...Yeah, that's definitely Tarble..."

* * *

The battle over, the team had taken to the sky again on Appa.

"What the hell were you thinking!?" Vegeta asked."You should've known this planet was a dead zone after I crashed into it! New we're _both_ marooned here with no outside help!"

"Well, excuse me for wanting to see my brother that hasn't been heard of since Planet Namek exploded," Tarble looked away in frustration,"I thought for the longest time Frieza killed you!"

The older Saiyan prince snorted."I didn't exactly didn't see _you_ on Namek looking for the Dragon Balls!"

As Katara healed the last of Aang's injuries, Mai huffed."Great, now I got _two_ pairs of bickering siblings to listen to..."

Toph chuckled."Yeah, two fussy sugargueens and two handsome meatheads..."

Sokka, piloting Appa, blinked."Wait, so you think _I'm_ handsome?"

Toph's sightless eyes widened."Wha-I meant-dShut up!" she barked with blushed cheeks.

"And indecently, Frieza also died, but permanently." Vegeta went on.

Tarble looked surprised."Frieza's dead!?"

"Yup," nodded Vegeta,"also Cooler - killed that sonofabitch myself."

Questions were poping throughout Tarble's mind faster than he could process them,"Cooler!? But how did Frie-"

"My son killed him," Vegeta answered.

"You have a son!?"

"Yes, yes I do," Vegeta affirmed casually,"ought to be two years old by now..."

Tarble was utterly speechless, until he asked the only question that could be asked at that point."Are you saying Frieza was killed by a baby?"

Vegeta smirked with more pride than ever, folding his arms behind his head."My baby boy."

"Vegeta, how did you get here so fast?" Aang asked." I thought you were heading for Omashu to get your suit back?"

"I already made it there last night, incase you hadn't figured," the Saiyan replied, gesturing to his armor."The next morning, I was back at the lake where my spaceship landed; once I rolled it out of the water - thanks for _helping_ , by the way - I barely managed to get the com-system working, which is how I miraculously picked up Tarble's scouter over here," he nodded his head toward his younger brother,"and, by extension, over-heard that bastard Cell's voice..." he hissed the last part."The very next thing I did was fly directly to Tarble's coordinate's, and reunite my fist with Cell's abdomen," He smirked."I guess he wasn't ready for the _warm-up..._ "

Tarble stared quizzically at his brother's last remark."...Okay, I feel like you're referencing something, and I don't get it..."

"Hang on a sec," Toph interjected,"Are you telling us that, starting from the moment you heard the green guy talking, you basically flew halfway from Omashu to _here_ in time it took for him to beat us all up!?

Vegeta rolled his eyes."Oh, calm down, I was only a hundred miles away, at best."

All non-Saiyans in the saddle were speechless.

Aang coughed."Well, it's just good to have you back Vegeta..."

"Then don't worry about me leaving any time soon: between my totaled ship, Tarble's totaled ship, and still-living Cell hunting you down for some reason, I have sufficient reason to stay affixed to your precious little ass."

"Dude...you're an adult..." Mai cringed.

"And _he's_ over a century old, so get your knife throwing head out of the gutter!" Vegeta barked.

"She can throw blades with her mind?" Tarble asked.

Vegeta and Mai fell down anime style.

"I am _this_ close to missing the other Earth right now..." Vegeta groaned.

Just then, a thought popped in the airbender's head that caused him to giggle.

"Yes, we fell over, how funny..." Vegeta rolled his eyes.

"Oh, it wasn't that..." Aang replied,"It's, well...you kept your promise."

"My what?" Vegeta raised a brow.

"When you were fighting that guy...you blew up a whole mountain right in front of our sorry faces, just like you said before you left." the airbender explained with that sweet little lambpuppy smile of his.

Vegeta's scowl vanished at the realization. A smile grew across his cheeks."I take it there're no more doubts about who and what I am anymore?"

"Not from here on, oh Prince of Saiyans," Aang knelt before the alien.

"You people are aware I also am the Prince of Saiyans?" Tarble interjected irritably.

"Our apologies," Katara said; then she herself knelt to Vegeta,"All hail the _crowned_ Prince of Saiyans."

"Ouch." snorted Toph.

Aang, Katara, Toph, and Vegeta burst into laughter, the older Saiyan sticking out his finger at his deadpanning brother.

Sokka would have joined in on the roast, but as he held Appa's reins, his right hand let go, slowly descending to his person, and carefully pressed his palm upon the spot where Cell stabbed him: the wound was gone before Katara even healed it.


	9. Maximum Gains

_"ninety-nine million nine hundred ninety-nine thousand nine hundred ninety-eight..._ _ninety-nine million nine hundred ninety-nine thousand nine hundred ninety-nine_ _..." Vegeta grunted with each push-up._

 _Suddenly, the ship's monitor flashed on."YOU LET TRUNK'S WATCH AN R-RATED MOVIE!?"_

 _The scream broke Vegeta's concentration, making him plop to the floor, which was a very very hard fall, given the 500 gs."Dammit, woman! I was just short of one hundred million push-ups! You know how important my regiment is!_

 _Bulma rolled her eyes."I know: one hundred_ _million push-ups, one hundred million sit-ups, etc - where do you even go to do a 10 million kilometer run?"_

 _"I run around in the space ship really really fast." Vegeta explained._

 _"Good for you-Why the hell did you show Trunk's The Revenant!?"_

 _"Is that the one with..."_

 _"THE FREAKING BEAR, YES!" Bulma answered."You sat an 18 month old baby down to see a blood-stained man crawl through the woods, gut a dead horse, and hack Tom Hardy's fingers off!?"_

 _"No, I sat him down to see an Oscar-worthy actor go out of his way to finally earn an Oscar," Vegeta explained."In all honesty, though, that bear should have won an Oscar as well..."_

 _Bulma clawed her face."Oh my god, I can't believe this, I can't believe you actually have to be TOLD that a goddamn baby shouldn't watch violent movies..."_

 _"Well what then, Breifs?" Vegeta inquired."Should I allow him to see an insipid cartoon about a brainless little girl who teaches that all our problems can be solved by constantly asking what to do next?"_

 _"YES!" she shook her fists," That is VERY good advice for a baby to be taught!"_

 _The prince huffed."For a human baby perhaps. On my world, babies were customarily deployed to indigenous planets so that they can conquer them before they even know their own name."_

 _"THIS ISN'T YOUR WORLD!" Bulma fumed._

 _"But HE is MY baby," Vegeta reminded."When will it get into your skull, woman? Trunks isn't one of them, he could destroy this entire planet just by having a tantrum; he's stronger than I was at his age, you can't ignore his heritage forever!"_

 _"Trunks isn't only Saiyan, your highness," Bulma hissed,"maybe YOU should stop ignoring his human heritage! Trunks IS one of us! He was born on Earth, raised on Earth - thanks for never spending time with him by the way - and only understands how Earth works, not Planet Vegeta! His Saiyan genes make him strong, but at least his human genes give him a heart! His future self saved the world! You think he would have cared about saving the world if he were a pure Saiyan!?"_

 _Vegeta looked away snarkilly."Well, if Kakarot were any indication, I guess so; but then again, he had severe brain damage, so what's that say about being a good person? Even so, his human genes are irrelevant, and at best, hold him back!" he barked._

 _"From what, Vegeta!? From being a monster like you!?"_

 _"Face the facts, Bulma! Our child IS a monster! He's the monster that grew up to kill Freiza! And that was WITHOUT my guidance!" Vegeta exclaimed,"And I assure you, woman, now that I survived the androids, I will see to it that our son will be the strongest being in the universe!"_

 _"THE HELL YOU WILL!" Bulma thundered, immediately cutting off the screen._

 _The training room was now left with a deafening silence, during which Vegeta was left with no words and none to share them with._

 _He simply snorted."Whatever, I'll just skip to the sit-ups..."_

* * *

"Today's the day!"Aang cried excitedly." Can you believe it? After all that time searching for a teacher, I'm finally starting earthbending! And this place..." he scanned the rocky terrain," i-it's perfect! Don't you think, Sokka?"

The warrior teen responded with an annoyed moan.

The Avatar blinked."Oh, you're still sleeping, huh? _sorry..."_ he whispered, making sure his friend could peacefully resume his rest.

 **"DAMN RIGHT YOU'RE SORRY!"**

The area was shocked with a surge of ki that frightened every member of the team to their feet, including Toph, whom was annoyed she'd been beaten to getting a dramatic entrance.

The glowing Vegeta gritted his teeth."As in 'sorry' for thinking you were still going to be wasting your time learning how to move rocks with your mind!"

"But, Vegeta, Aang has to," Katara reminded,"he needs to master all four elements and defeat the Fire Lor-"

"Have you just spontaneously forgotten the shit that went down the other day!?" The Saiyan growled."Cell is ALIVE, and for whatever reason wants to absorb you! Who gives a crap about your little weeaboo Darth Vader with the literal killing machine on your planet doing Kai know's what!?"

Mai blinked."I dunno who 'Dark Vader' is, but I still find it ironic for you compare him to Fire Lord Ozai..."

Tarble held his chin."My brother has a point: I highly doubt control over the elements alone will suffice against Cell, or the Princess for that matter."

"What kinda' stupid stuff is that?" Sokka demanded."That's all the more reason for Aang to master the elements. What more can we do?"

The taller Saiyan glared at Sokka with an unbearably sarcastic expression."Oh, I don't know, great warrior, if only there were some _other_ kind of power we could use to destroy Cell, maybe something along the lines of-" he interrupted himself by shooting a ki blast in the air without looking; after the noise of the explosion, a smoking bird corpse plopped to the dirt behind him.

All non-Saiyan heads stared at Vegeta in surprise.

"OOoookay, hold on!" Toph raised her hands toward Vegeta as if to signal to halt."You want Aang to just forget about his balance-restoring destiny, and try to learn how to use chi like you guys do!?"

"I guess you really _are_ great at listening to things, aren't you?" Vegeta confirmed.

"But that's never gonna work!" Sokka yelled."Aang's just s regular human being who has _chi_ and not whatever 'ki' is! He can't fly without a glider and shoot light from his body!"

"So I take it those two Fire Nation war-lollies aren't human either?" Vegeta reminded." _Anyone_ can harness their ki into energy attacks regardless of species; just some can do it better than others is all."

"Well, alright then, Prince of Racism." Mai responded.

Vegeta's bitter eyes locked onto Mai's."My people have literally been referred to as ' filthy monkeys' for eons; compared to me, you don't get a pass, space-Jap."

Tarble meekly stared down at his monkey tail."...I mean...they're not entirely wrong..."

"Off-topic!" Sokka interjected."Listen, I have no idea how Princess Azula figured it out, but we haven't, okay? Again, we didn't even know it was possible until we met you guys!"

Vegeta crossed his arms,"Well I think the 'how' is painfully obvious: It must have been Cell that taught them; as you said, neither you or they haven't seen anything like what we can do before I arrived, so the only logical conclusion is that it's Cell's doing. If _they_ can do it, so can he!" he pointed to the airbender.

Sokka pointed at the same child."You can't just expect Aang to just forget everything he's been taught his whole life and replace it with you crazy space-laser stuff!"

"That's along the line of what I thought before I became a Super Saiyan." he replied, earning a WTF stare from his brother."At first it seemed impossible; but then I was lying there thinking to myself how I really really wanted to be a Super Saiyan, and then _boom,_ Super Saiyan."

"Like I said, we're not Saiyans," Sokka reminded,"Aang has learned to bend three out of the four elements already, it's too late to teach him anything else other than that, or at least _before_ he learns all four elements."

"Well, good luck trying to find a firebendeing teacher; 'cause last time I checked, they all want his head." Vegeta also reminded

Aang raised a finger."Actually, there was this guy name Jeong Jeong..."

"And when was the last time you've heard of 'Jeong Jeong'?"

Aang's finger dropped."Point made."

"It doesn't matter!" Sokka dismissed." The point is Aang is the Avatar, and it's his destiny to master all four elements; and if Chin Village's crazy history holds any validity, that's all Avatar Kyoshi needed to defeat your dad."

"Because his power was weakened, same as ours are at the moment," Vegeta replied."If it were any other planet in the universe, she wouldn't have stood a chance."

"Says you!" Sokka flung his finger in Vegeta's face."Give us one good reason why ki in and of itself is a better option than a fully realized Avatar!"

At this, Vegeta's face couldn't have been more dull."To start, I can give you _four_ reason's..." with that, Vegeta raised his hand again, but this time it was as a fist. He flicked up his index finger."Water..." not a moment later, a glob of aqua from the nearby pond shot over to behind Vegeta, morphing into a liquid sphere. He flicked his middle finger open."Earth..." a circular crack formed in the plateau to his right, and out flew a large stone next to the water."Fire..." a sudden plume of flame burst out of the tip of his ring finger, curling back into a ball. He silently summoned a swirling orb of wind with his pinky, and stood before the bewildered teens with his other hand on his hip just to drive even further how hilariously easy it was for him to do so."You truly do have a way with ironic punchlines, boy."

The Avatar's eyes were on the verge of exploding, and likely his brain along with them."h...he...hu...hhhghhh...HOW!?"

"With my KI, you numskull!" Vegeta barked, waving the elements away."Bending the elements to one's will is nothing unique to the universe; ki can be used for just about everything, from healing, telekinesis, mind reading, transformation, to making clothes! It would take a people just as primitive as yours to not be using it!"

The stunned, borderline traumatized Katara stared at Vegeta."Are you saying that...there's nothing special about Aang? _Anyone_ can master all four elements? For the past century, millions of innocent people have fought, killed, and died due to sheer ignorance!?" She looked down at her once precious waterbending hands."I've been living a lie..." she breathed.

"HOOhoho, your people haven't even scratched the surface of that asteroid, girl..." Vegeta rolled his eyes.

"So why the hell haven't WE figured it out yet!?" demanded Toph."As far as our history can tell us, none of our people have ever actually flown without airbending or shot chi or ki or whatever out of their hands, not even in myth! Let alone bend any more than one element!"

"Once again..." in a flash, Vegeta's hair turned gold"...Super Saiyan..." he point his thumb to his hair.

"I'VE BEEN LIVING A LIE!" Tarble shrieked, clutching his head.

Mai tapped her chin."So from I'm gathering from this, is that you guys're in no way spiritually justified in stopping the Fire Nation from ruling the world?"

"What can I say?" Vegeta shrugged,"Sometimes the truth hurts, sometimes the truth helps, almost always both."

"HEY! We are NOT going to spend all day trying to rationalize that!" Sokka put his foot down," It doesn't matter who knows what, the Water Tribe and Earth Kingdom are still at war with the Fire Nation, and it's up to us to put an end to it! So seeing as how none of us can even _begin_ to understand how to master the elements _or_ master chi-bending, I vote we go with the cup that's already three quarters full: help Aang master all four elements!" he announced while raising Aang's hand like boxing champion.

"Hooray for being relatively special!" Aang agreed.

"Except that defeating the Fire Nation now involves your savor having to take on two Fire Nation girls that are _objectively_ more special the he is." Vegeta reminded.

Aang's hand dropped from Sokka's grip.

"...And not to mention Perfect-goddamn-Cell, whom it took the destruction of a literal mountain just to neutralize, want's to drink you alive?"

The airbender was frozen. He blinked...then instantly zipped towards Vegeta, bowing before the Saiyan's feet."Please accept me as your pupil, Sifu Vegeta."

"WHAT!?" Toph gaped."What happened to Sifu Toph!?"

"Forget Sifu Toph," Katara added,"What happened to Master Katara!? We might not be like you, but we're still masters of our arts, Aang! How could you turn on us like this!?"

Aang, still bowing..."Look, guys, I'm not doubting you, it's such that things got a lot different after Vegeta beat Toph."

"YOU SAID WE WOULD NEVER MENTION THAT AGAIN!" Toph cried, as if stabbed through the heart.

"I'm sorry! But if what Vegeta says about chi is true, then all I need to master all four elements is to master chi itself! Do you see any other masters of chi!?"

Tarble scoffed."And what exactly am I?"

"A lower class disappoint that can't even take on a single human," Answered Vegeta.

"Oh, so that's it then!?" Katara fumed."We by default aren't masters anymore? You just expect me and Toph to revoke the titles we rightfully earned through years of training, trials, and mortal combat, and bend a knee to someone else!?"

"My apologies," Vegeta apologized but not really,"If you two honestly feel this strongly about your respective titles, I suppose neither of you would mind dueling to defend them..." with that, he powered back up to Super Saiyan."Who's first?"

The sweat raining water and earth benders stared at eachother...

 _"Please accept us your pupils!"_ they both zipped to and bow before his feet.

* * *

"Zuko, Zuko! Wake up!" Iroh yelled as he desperately shook his nephew's motionless body. The boy was still breathing, but he seemed caught in a heavy sleep, evidently from exhaustion. No matter how loudly Iroh yelled, the would-be Fire Lord found it to be futile. Iroh sighed - there was only one thing to remedy this."LOOK, ZUKO! IT'S THE AVATAR!"

"WHERE!?" Zuko's upper half sprung off the ground like a catapult, rapidly scanning the dry surroundings like a starving vulture. Moments later, the confused Zuko sighed."How long was I out?"

"A full day or so, it seems," the uncle said,"apparently, you had passed out after running for a very long distance; I thank the spirits I found you."

"Me too, Uncle," Zuko replied,"That village almost killed me..."

"So, you stumbled into an Earth Kingdom village I take it?" Iroh deduced.

"Yeah, I spent a night there in this family's barn; they let me sleep there after I protected their child from a bunch of soldiers that were taking advantage of them. The next morning, the same soldiers kidnapped the boy to lure me into a fight."

"...At which point you inevitably defended yourself with firebending..." Iroh inferred.

Zuko could only rub his cranium."That's the crazy part: I didn't firebend at all; I took them on with nothing but my two swords..."

"...Which you stole."

"...which I stole..." Zuko sighed,"but then I was knocked out for a moment, and when I awoke, the person I was fighting was beaten to death, and the whole town blamed me for it."

"That sounds very odd," Iroh stroked his beard."It sounds as if you killed the man in blind rage, but then how could you forget such a thing?"

"I dunno," Zuko said,"Was I really that out of it?"

"You may have a bad temper, Zuko, but certainly not _that_ bad...did this fight take place in a bar by any chance?"

"I don't drink, Uncle," Zuko glared.

"I was just speaking from experience..." the old man held up his hands innocently.

Zuko blinked."Wait, you mean you once beat a man to death in a bar-"

"Moving on..." Iroh hastily changed the subject,"I'm just happy that we're together again, Nephew. And given our current circumstances, I believe it's time to resume your training. It's only a matter of time before Azula finds us, so you and I must be fully prepared."

"But she's my sister," Zuko reminded meekly,"Shouldn't we be trying to get along?"

"Are you crazy?" Iroh retorted,"That little bitch needs to go down."

Only the deadest stare could Zuko give his uncle."...Just how recently did this bar fight take place?"

* * *

The land rocked as Vegeta powered up to the highest limit his base form currently allowed, blazing with a huge blue aura; and, naturally, he was screaming at the top of his Saiyan lungs. He abruptly ceased doing both of these things, the ground no longer shaking and the land ringing with echoes."And that's basically how you do it." He finished calmly.

The Gaang, finally unfazed by Vegeta's energized frenzies, just looked at him with placid expressions.

"...wow..." Toph not-marveled,"So you pretty much showed us...nothing we haven't already seen."

"Wouldn't that be 'felt' in your case?" Aang queried.

"My case?" Toph repeated," _both._ "

"The hell are you talking about!?" Vegeta gawked."I just illustrated to you brats step by step how to charge your ki; do I seriously have to do it again?"

"Please, Agni, not again..." Mai dreaded.

"This isn't that simple, Vegeta," Tarble explained,"You and I were raised in a civilization where ki control has been the norm for who knows how long; you can't expect them to understand just by seeing it."

"Which reels us back to my earlier question..." Vegeta began as he slowly swerved his annoyed head in Tarble's direction,"How the hell did the _princess_ figure it out!?"

"Because Cell powered them up." Mai answered.

Everyone turned to look at the goth.

"Azula and Tai Lee were able to do that because Cell gave them some of his ki; they told us themselves, remember?"

Vegeta blinked."Oh right, now I remember..."

(As did the writer just now...)

"I see..." Tarble rubbed his chin,"The reason they were able to control it so well was because, for the first time in their lives, they actually _felt_ ki, and thus giving them a natural sense of what how it works."

The older Saiyan flicked his arms up."Well, shit, if it's that simple..." Vegeta put his gloved hands together and rubbed them like defibrillator pads."Step right up, kids."

The airbender's forehead started to gain moisture."Ummm, is that _really_ a good idea?"

"Look, boy, you're clearly the strongest human on this planet; if Princess Hellfire can handle some juice from Cell, you've got nothing to worry about. Now which one of you wants some new powers? I'm sure Sokka'd love to...Sokka?" Vegeta just then realized said teen was missing from the group."Where the hell's Sokka!?"

"He got sick of your living explosion thing and went hunting," Toph explained,"I'm sure he'll be back soon..." of course, thanks to her seismic sense, she was fully aware Sokka was currently stuck in a hole somewhere all alone out in the wilderness well outside of the range of screaming for help, but she held back her smirk.

"Whatever," Vegeta snorted,"Just get over here, Avatar."

The kids looked among one another; given the information, the airbender had little to object to, and so he walked over to Vegeta.

Tarble eyed his brother carefully."Vegeta, are you sure want to do this? You do remember the last time you infused your ki into something else?"

"You know I don't have nearly enough energy to do that again..." Vegeta snapped as Aang stopped in front of him.

The Avatar closed his eyes and took a deep breath."Okay, so what exactly do I have to-"

Vegeta immediately clasped his fingers around the boy's skull."By the blessing of my royal ancestry I bestow upon you the power of **SUPER VEGETAAAAAAAA!**..." as his Bruce Faulconer Super Saiyan theme kicked in, he instantly powered up to Super Saiyan with a thunderous scream. His Saiyan ki surged through Aang's body, causing himself to be engulfed in the same golden aura as he screamed just as loud and indefinitely as Vegeta. The rest of the group watched in awe as the two lit the area with the massive wave of energy.

* * *

"HAAAAGH!" Iroh shouted as he released a gigantic current of lightning from his fingers, the sky crackling like thunder. "And that's basically how you do it." He finished calmly.

Given _their_ circumstances, Iroh felt it to be finally the time to see if Zuko were able to perform the art of lightingbending. Iroh doubted Zuko would successfully pull it off, and frankly, so did Zuko; but they were out of other options or allies. Whether or not the prince could execute the technique, what mattered was that he _needed_ to.

"I'm ready to try it!" Zuko announced, getting into position.

"Remember," Iroh cautioned his nephew,"once you separate the energy, you do not command it. You are simply its humble guide. Breathe first."

Zuko breathed in and closed his eyes. He then began to mimic the motions that Iroh performed, except that he does not create traces of lightning. Iroh was holding himself in suspense as he watched Zuko prepare a move so dangerous that he might actually explode into a huge red stain on the ground (he was now in deep regret of leaving out that part...). The both of them bracing themselves, Zuko thrusts his right fingers forward, and through them comes not fire, not lightning, not an explosion, but a purple ray of pure energy that bolted out over the horizon."I did it!" he smiled victoriously.

Iroh, on the other hand, was stunned, as if Azula had struck him right in the chest (which never happened in this continuity)."Zuko...you...definitely did something..."

"I got it on the first try!" Zuko beamed."Let's see if I can do it again!"

"Zuko, WAIT-!"

The next instant, Zuko once again shot a purple ray from his fingers, even more seamless than before."I did it, Uncle! It's so easy, I don't even think I have to charge up for it!" He said as he quickly fire another beam from his finger without nearly as much effort as the first time.

Iroh stood there, watching in amazement as his nephew repeatedly performed the move over and over, each in different stances; at some point, he was doing trick shots, on one leg, in mid jump with his legs spread wide, with his eyes covered, between his legs, all while making childish "pyew!" noises.

"Zuko! ZUKO, STOP!" Iroh grabbed Zuko's shooting hand before he could fire one while looking at a mirror."Zuko, I do not know what that is, but it _definitely_ is not lighting!"

"Who cares, Uncle!?" Zuko retorted positively,"Lightning or not, I'm even better at it than Azula! I can finally do something _better_ than her! PISHEW!" He cried as he shot finger lasers out of both hands; this time, it hit the distant ground, producing an explosion bigger than either one of them expected."I'll show her! I SHOW THEM **ALL!"** Zuko's body emitted an invisible shockwave that blew Iroh on his back, causing the old man to whale in pain, causing the teen's exited demeanor to vanish."Uncle!" he cried, rushing to his aid.

"I'm fine, Zuko..." Iroh grunted himself to sit."Just an old injury..."

Zuko looked at his hands: _he_ did that."Uncle...how am I doing this?"

"No idea," Iroh answered honestly,"It's as if you just harnessed your chi and released it; like firebending, but, well, without actually firebending at all."

"Could this be how I killed that earthbender?" Zuko wondered. The idea of having such uncontrollable power suddenly gripped his stomach with terror."I'm sorry, I'll never do that again."

"Don't be too hard on yourself, Nephew," Iroh sighed,"Clearly you discovered some..." he coughed,"latent ability after having been so close to dying yourself..." he coughed some more,"Not all that impossible..."

"But I lost control the first time," Zuko dreaded,"Can I even be trusted around you?"

"We don't really have a choice, Zuko..." Iroh calmly replied, as Zuko helped him to his feet." However you're controlling your chi directly, you'll have to learn to master it for yourself; this isn't firebending; this is your pure lifeforce, the essence of your spirit, drawn like a weapon the likes of which no human being has ever seen," he stared into the clouds prudently..."Not gonna like, it's cool..."

"Yeah..." Zuko agreed."Cooler than lightning...so much...Cooler..." he muttered mindlessly.

* * *

Aang continued to scream uncontrollably as the also still screaming Vegeta continued to pump his energy into his head.

"How has he not been obliterated yet!?" Toph covered her ears.

"For a person who's never even used his ki before, his body seems very conditioned to handle it...!" Tarble noted.

As if struck by lighting, a sudden spark of energy blasted Aang out of Vegeta's grip, cutting the music off, the airbender blowing past his friends, and right into Appa's belly, the sleeping bison totally unfazed, sliding to the ground. The group gathered around him, his eyes facing different directions and foam gurgling out of his mouth.

Tarble sighed."Well, at least only _one_ died this time..."

"Piss off, his fine!" Vegeta barked.

Aang lazily moaned, pushing himself up as he wiped the foam off his face.

"...Well? How do you feel?" Katara asked.

Aang looked at the ground thoughtfully. He raised his finger and inhaled through his mouth to answer, but then his eyes and tattoos flashed white. The group was pushed away by his swirling air dome.

"YOU TRIGGERED HIS AVATAR STATE!" Katara cried.

"Avatar-whatnow!?" Vegeta queried."What is this!? You never told me your people _also_ has some kind of legendary super form! I'm starting to think there's nothing special about _me_ either...!"

 **"WHAT DID YOU SAY, VEGETA? I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THIS WIND!"** Aang boomed. **"WAIT, WHO SAID THAT? IS THAT MY VOICE?"** He looked at his glowing tattoos. **"WOAH! GUYS, I THINK I'M IN THE AVATAR STATE!"**

"NO SHIT!" Toph cried, her senses going haywire.

"COULD EVERYBODY STOP F*#&ING YELLING FOR TWO MINUTES!?" Mai fumed.

 **"I'M NOT YELLING."** Aang's voice rocked their heads.

"Aang!" Katara called."Do you think you could queit yourself down!?"

 **"I DUNNO WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, BUT I'LL TRY..."** The mass collective of voices replied. Avatar Aang took a deep breath.

The loud winds whipped away, and the air dome vanished, but Aang remained illuminated."How about now?" He asked with his normal voice, but still retaining an ethereal after effect.

"That'll do for now..." Mai muttered.

"I don't know what the hell this is, but at least we're getting somewhere," Vegeta remarked."Tarble! What does the _scouter_ say about his _powerlevel_!?" he leaned slightly with his fists clenched

Tarble raised a brow."What just happened with your inflection just now?"

"Just post-traumatic stress; just give us a reading," he dismissed.

Tarble nodded, and activated his scouter in the glowing boy's direction. After a few beeps, Tarble was shocked."It worked! His power level's also nine thousand!"

The older prince whipped his head."WHATNINETHOUSAN-!" he shook his head."Wait, what do you mean 'also' nine thousand...?" he asked, wondering if his brother had been spying on him during his initial arrival on the other Earth.

"That's the same powerlevels those girls from before had when I scanned them." Tarble explained.

"Ah, so _that's_ why you screamed like a bitch..."

Tarble scowled.

"Anyway, let's see what you've got, boy," Vegeta commanded.

"Okay then..." the glowing Aang shrugged. He thrusted his hand in the sky, launching an enormous pillar of wind into the clouds, making a hole in them.

"Not bad, Twinkle-Toes..." Toph smirked, given that even she of all people could perceive that.

"No, bad," Vegeta disagreed," _very_ bad! You were supposed to fire a ki blast! Try again!"

And so Aang did, several times; but every time, it was still an enhanced blast of airbending.

"Oh come on!" Vegeta facepalmed,"Can you really not do anything else after all that power I just gave you!?"

"I mean, I could try firebending..."

"NOOOOOO thanks, I'm good!" Katara zipped behind Vegeta, given the last time he bent fire _without_ any help.

The older prince slunked over with a growling huff."Well, it looks like I'm still going to actually have to teach you stupid children how to properly harness your own life energy..."

"Fan-damn-tastic," Mai complained,"Let the scream-fest resume..."

 _"HEEELP!"_

They were all put off by the distance but familiar scream.

"Was that Sokka?" Katara wondered.

 _"IT'S ME! SOKKA!"_

"I wonder what he's yelling so loud for," added Aang.

 _"I'VE BEEN STUCK IN A HOLE ALL DAY AND NOW I'M ABOUT TO BE KILLED BY A LARGE APEX PREDATOR!"_

"Can he hear us?" Toph asked.

 _"I CAN! SCREW YOU, TOPH!"_

* * *

The group made there way to the clearing where Sokka had been stuck this whole time apparently, with the aforementioned beast aggressively circling him.

"What in Kai's name is that thing?" Vegeta demanded with a disturbed expression.

"It's a sabertoothed-moose-lion!" Aang panicked.

"It's a cross between a prehistoric lion and a **_moose_?**" Vegeta slowly recited, simply unable to emphasize the word "moose" hard enough."What the hell do they eat!?"

"Morons from the Southern Water Tribes, it looks like," Mai surmised.

"Sooo, who's gonna save'em?" Toph crossed her arms.

"I think YOU know who...!" Sokka growled, but cowered as the moose-lion growled back.

"Whatever, do your thing, Aang," Toph waved her hand.

"But I'm so powered up; I could kill it," Aang worried.

"As opposed to who else!?" Sokka reminded, eyeing the drooling monster.

"Well I can't do it; I left my water pouch back at camp," Katara noted.

" _After_ hearing me scream for help!?" Sokka inquired, the animal sniffing him.

"Okay, seriously, a _lion...with..._ a MOOSE!?" Vegeta reiterated, flinging each hands forward respective to each animal."They don't even live in the same environment!"

"How bizarre..." Tarble agreed."Wouldn't its moose antlers hinder its lion canines from fully wrapping around the jugular of its prey? Or weigh it down while chasing its prey in the first place?"

"Yes, we get it, this is a weird looking animal...!" Sokka dismissed, the animal nibbling his hair.

"But does it even hunt!? It's part moose!" Vegeta scratched his head."Does it graze or scavenge, or both!? Neither!? This creature makes no sense!"

"Perhaps the canines are for eating wood?" Tarble proposed.

"Then why isn't it a _beaver_ -moose!?" Vegeta reminded.

"Good point..."

"Speaking of _points_...!" Sokka gritted his teeth, watching the animal pull back its lips to reveal its huge fangs.

"You gonna save him or not?" Mai asked Toph.

"Not!" she pressed her thumb against her chest."I got up this morning to teach the Avatar how to earthbend; instead, I get told I ran away from home for nothing, and wind up spending all day listening to 'The Mighty Oozaru' scream his guts out like he's been doing since before we even met! If anyone's gonna achieve something relevant today, it's Twinkle-Toes!"

"But Toph, I've never even been conscious during the Avatar state before; I could end up hurting Sokka!"

"You know what, guys? This is fine, just lemme die; life is overrated, am I right, Foo Foo Cuddilypoops?..." Sokka referred to the baby as the adult creature scratched his cranium.

"Maybe it sustains itself on some kind of large, chewy fungus?" Tarble speculated."That would account for the need for long teeth as well as its herbivorous traits..."

"Then why is it about to bite Sokka's head off?" Katara asked, but then remembered."OHMYGODITSABOUTBITESOKKASHEADOFF!"

The massive (confirmed) carnivore pounced onto Sokka and-

 ***BOOM***

The group shielded their eyes from the sudden blast, which shattered the ground, splintered the trees, and crackled the area like a thunder bolt. The dust was blown away to reveal Sokka screaming at the tops of his lungs, not while being mauled to death by the moose-lion, but with a brilliant white aura surrounding him, quaking the earth.

"greeaaat, more screaming..." Mai drolled.

Vegeta was shocked beyond saying complete sentences."Wha!? How did!? I didn't even!? TARBLE, SCOUTER!"

"AGAIN, OVER NINE THOUSAND!" the shorter prince shouted.

Sokka's aura shrunk, leaving him panting and leaning on his knees...in the center of the crater he just made."Thanks for taking your sweet time, Toph!"

"I'd accept that thank-you, but..." Toph's blind eyes blinked,"Either you're an earthbender...or another Saiyan."

"Well given the aura, it seems either Nappa or Raditz was a very busy man..." Vegeta inferred.

"What's that supposed to mean!?" Sokka glared at the Saiyan.

"It means you just freed yourself, genius," Vegeta replied."Look at your body."

The radiant Sokka did, and nearly pissed his pants (a second time)."Holy crap, I'm in the Avatar State!"

"Not quite," Vegeta dismissed."But it seems, through this moment of crisis, you've unlocked some hidden potential. I suppose, in Saiyan terms, that'd make you an elite among your people."

The teen was breathless."...wait...You're saying I'm doing this on my own!? I can fly and light-bend just like you!?"

"Congratulations, Sokka," Vegeta smirked," you're this planet's equivalent of me."

Toph's ear's threatened to pop off."You're kidding me..."

 **"THIS IS AMAZING!"** Aang bellowed.

Sokka yelped, actually peeing again, just a little."Oh no! Aang's in the Avatar State for real!"

"Relax, Sokka!" Katara made a calming gesture,"Aang's fully in control of the Avatar State now."

Sokka broke from his cowardly stance."He is? Since when!?"

"Since my brother thought it a good idea to risk blowing him to bits by infusing an insane amount of pure destructive energy into a small child's brain on the off chance that it'd make him stronger..." Tarble answered in a tone not unlike Mai's.

"...the latter happening, which makes you're opinion worthless." Vegeta retorted.

"Well ain't this just a day of miracles..." Toph noted sarcastically," At this rate, I'll be able to see by dinner."

Vegeta blinked, and looked at his hands pensively.

"Don't even think about it!" Tarble shouted.

"I wasn't actually _gonna_...!" Vegeta barked immaturely.

"Hold on a second..." Katara's gazed swooshed between her brother and her make belief lover."If Sokka naturally has these powers...doesn't...doesn't that mean _he's_ been the more powerful sibling all this time!? I REALLY _HAVE_ BEEN LIVING A LIE!" she shrieked.

Tarble patted the poor girl's back."Welcome to my non-remarkable world..."

"I AM SPECIAL!" Sokka cheered." A future full of struggle and anguish my ass, Aunt Wu!"

"Doesn't that also mean a lot of the bad stuff that's happened to you guys is the partial result of your own negligence?" Mai raised her finger."Not to mention the death of your mother?"

The area lost a noticeable degree of temperature upon this implication.

Sokka dropped to his knees."...she was right all along..." he breathed, enveloped by by an extreme Spider-Man complex along with his aura.

"We have no time for that philosophical crap!" Vegeta interjected, zipping to Sokka and pulling him back up."The point is there's actually _someone_ on this stupid planet that actually has the same abilities as everyone else in the universe besides the rest of you for some stupid reason! Which in turn means between you, me, and Tarble, our odds against Cell and the lollies have nearly been evened!" he explained, gaining a confused stare from his weaker brother."And taking the powered up Avatar into account, the odds have been just about balanced out!"

At this monologue, Aang's lit eyes and mouth widened, an elongated gasp seeping from his throat."Then that means...I did, guys! I restored the balance! And I don't even have to fight the Fire Lord! I saved the world!"

 _"HOORAY!"_ Team Avatar pumped their fist to the sky.

 **THE END**

* * *

"No you didn't," Mai denounced."You still have to help Vegeta defeat Cell and help him leave the planet; and after that, everything goes back to normal, and you still have to master all four elements and defeat the Fire Lord."

 _"SON OF A BITCH!"_ Team Avatar growled.

Sokka shrugged."Aw well, at least since I have powers now, so it shouldn't be as hard as we thought."

"Speaking of which," Vegeta began with a foreboding tone,"Since you're assistance in the destruction of Cell is suddenly a legitimate factor..." the Saiyan stared deeply into the confused Sokka's eyes,"you will not be going into battle half-baked: as stated before, the only master of ki on this world is currently yours truly, so for your sake, I hope you're ready to start addressing me as 'Vegeta-Sensei'."

Sokka gawked."You expect me to call you my 'master'!? Over my-!"

 ***flash***

"Choose your words carefully, child," Super Saiyan Vegeta quietly stated.

Sokka's lips were sealed; his eyes turned to his friends, whom quickly nodded. As his face cringed from a mixture of fear and frustration, he knelt before the Saiyan."Please accept me as your pupil, Vegeta-Sensei..." he groaned.

Little did they know, from a distance plateau crouched Azula, whom had seen and heard everything she needed to."My my...how convenient..." she hissed. She then took off at the horizon, feeling that Cell had some explaining to do...

* * *

As his uncle sat snug in his sleeping sac, snoring up a storm, Zuko lie ten feet away, nodding off himself...

When he opened them again, he was not where he was before. The prince sprung off the metal floor, his eyes swerving all around the large, dim metallic chamber he was now in. In a beat, the chamber wasn't so dark, as his eyes caught a fiery flash of light to his right, on the other end of a window from which he saw nothing but the stars. As he approached the window, he could see the source of the light: a gigantic orb as bright as the sun, gradually pressing against what appeared to be a pinkish red planet, forming glowing cracks all around it, eventually culminating in the entire world exploding into nothing. Just before he could put a hand on the glass...

"What a waste."

Zuko's hand curled back as his head swung up to the figure.

Cooler's stoic face was lit by the explosion."Such a powerful species, such potential...and he wipes them out for his own sake; he was the one who sealed his fate...our fate..."

"Who are you?" Zuko asked again.

As if to answer, Cooler pointed to something else out in the cosmos."You see that there?"

Zuko's eyes followed, seeing a small blue light flying away from the doom world."Is that...Sozin's Comet?"

"Not a comet, a pod," Cooler spoke,"And in that pod is just another Saiyan. I could have destroyed it, but I didn't, and that Saiyan grew into the one who killed me."

" What's a Saiyan?" Zuko had to ask.

"A Saiyan is what is currently inhabiting your world; he has been weakened, but it will not last. He _will_ gain his full power back; and when he does, your world will end up just like this one."

As the teen turned back towards the fireball that was once a planet, his heart stopped for a moment."

Cooler's head turned to him, and peered his red pupils into the firebender's eyes."Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation, we need your help."


End file.
